[ SECRET POST #2466 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2466 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Late day at work, sorry.

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 010 secrets from Secret Submission Post #352.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - omgiknowthem ], [ 1 - troll ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[dinogrrl]

I don't disagree. Communication goes two (or more) ways. My point was that if someone's introverted or has anxiety issues, it is very easy for their actions and words to be misinterpreted or even outright overlooked by non-introverts. If you're used to people gushing for hours about how awesome something is, thanks a ton, let's do it again, etc., it's very easy to miss out on a simple "Thanks, this was fun." Neither version is wrong, but it can be confusing, or even rage-inducing, if you're expecting one and get the other.

[(Anonymous)]

That's certainly true.

[(Anonymous)]

I agree, to an extent. Having social anxiety sucks, because you often know that you're coming off as standoffish or selfish without really knowing how to fix the behavior. My social anxiety once got so bad that I was forced to quit university because I was refusing to talk to anybody, even in class. That's how embarrassed I was that I would say something "wrong" in front of people. :(

With that being said, it bothers me that people (not you. I mean people in general) blame rude behavior on their anxiety. Having social anxiety =/= being an asshole. And tbh, it sounds like the OP's friend was more of an asshole than anything else. They expected OP to pay their way, and never once said thank-you or offered to pay for a single meal or ticket? That's just assholeish. Even the most socially anxious people know what politeness is. They might say "thankyou" at an awkward moment, but they still know how to say it.

As far as I'm concerned, there's no excuse for a lack of politeness.

[dinogrrl]

I said in another comment elsewhere, but where I live, if someone invites you somewhere, they're the ones who pay for everything. It can be seen as insulting if you offer to help with a bill--you're insinuating that they're poor hosts. No way to know if that's what the OP's friend had in mind or if they were just being a cheap jerk though.

That being said, yeah, I agree that every effort should be made to be polite to your host no matter what.