fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2483 ]

[ SECRET POST #2483 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2483 ⌋

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ok, let's not talk about Tumblr-activism because we all know that may raise (more) awareness on some issues, may even be educative, but it hardly:

- Attracts anyone not interested in the issue in the first place.
- Does jackshit for the World Outside The Internet.

Let's talk about IRL-activism.

Allies in IRL instances are a sticky issue, and it doesn't even have to be about the LGTB. As an example, we had a couple of months ago a walk against the despenalization of abortion; and we had a lot of men coming to support the cause with us.

This is ok.

Some of them voiced their opinions and life experiences around the issue in the FB-event page.

This is also ok.

Some of them were trying to push their opinion forefront while invalidating the opinions or life-experiences of actual women who had abortions; and acting all high-and-mighty because LOOK AT ME I'M A MANNNNN BUT I CARE ABOUT THIS ISSUE YOU SHOULD BE SO V. V. GRATEFUL WE'RE INTERESTED AT ALL.

This is NOT ok, and made a lot of women who had been through the dangers of illegal abortions really upset, a lot of women who had unwanted pregnancies and couldn't abort (and now were dealing with the consequences) very angry, and the rest of us were in between uncomfortable as fuck (like myself) or "It's ok they behave this way, they've come to help!1 Doesn't matter they're being shitty, we need the numbers". It ended up in a lot of fighting and threads closing due to the wank.

Is the analogy clear enough? ^^;; It's like, if "mansplaining" is a thing, "straightspaining" should also be a thing.

That actually clears up the "line" very well, and makes a lot of sense. What you're saying is true. Support the cause, yeah, talk about experiences, sure, make yourself a martyr , hell no.

*splaining (sorry for the typo)

I'm glad I could make my point clear ^^ It's like, I'm happy to have your support, and I can even understand people opposed to the cause feel "safer" if an ally does activism instead of someone in the LGBT spectre. Depressing, but true, and can even work as a good punch towards the statu quo if worded ok, like IDK: "You don't need to be LGBT to understand [insert issue here] is an important issue, and that society needs to change and [propose solutions to issue here]".

It's the "make yourself a martyr" part what make us uncomfortable, or even angy depending on the sense of entitlement of the so-called-ally.

"It's ok they behave this way, they've come to help!1 Doesn't matter they're being shitty, we need the numbers".

I think there is probably some differing in opinion in what is "shitty" - I find SJW-types (sorry to throw out that term, but it applies) jump on things that I personally do not consider shitty at all. I find a lot of exaggerations on their part, and assuming of intentions, or just looking at the worst in people.

As a gay person, I'm not going to hate someone who leads their school's gay-straight alliance because they are straight. I'll say good for them. If they "demanded cookies", sure, I'd judge, but I don't think I've ever seen anyone do that, despite what tumblr would have you believe. Interrupting and speaking over gay people? Maybe, if the topic was about personal gay experiences or something.

I do think there is such a thing as too sensitive.

but yeah it'd depend on the actual situation. all in all, anti-ally shit in any -ism is stupid.

You're entitled to your opinion and experiences.

I'm a lesbian, and I'm specifically talking about not-Tumblr spaces (and IRL spaces) in which I've encountered the problem, in person. It's not like I don't know what I'm talking about. Yes, it has happened in groups I've participted, and yes: straight people can be selfish, loud, and entitled about LGBT issues; to the point it's not a "maybe we're being too sensitive", it's a "these people are being a royal pain".

So I'm entitled to my opinion and experiences as well.

I don't share the hate allies get, but I wouldn't say it's "stupid".

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2483 ]

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