[ SECRET POST #2510 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2510 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 092 secrets from Secret Submission Post #359.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Family guilt

[(Anonymous)]

*Hugs* It's not your fault she died. I'm very sorry she did, but her problems were hers.

I'm sure there are ways to find her grave. You can look it up online, or talk to a family member you think might be willing. Did she have siblings you sense she was close with? Friends?

Re: Family guilt

[(Anonymous)]

OP

*hugs* thank you

See, I want to believe that her problems were hers, but I know from experience growing up with the developmental disorders from the alcohol that sometimes you just can't get through shit by yourself, and you need people to help you even when you are a total shithead. And she didn't have that in her life. She didn't have a family or extended network to support her, and I feel so bad that she never had that chance. And I have to acknowledge my part in contributing to her problems.

I could probably ask my adoptive parents where she is, but... it's just too weird and awkward. They knew her much better than I did, and they really weren't fond of the way she lived or how she treated me as an infant.

She was Catholic, and she made sure to get me baptized. Maybe even if I can't find where she is, I can go light a candle for her. She probably would have liked that. I just want someone to remember her with love, instead of disgust or guilt, because no matter what she did, I still love her because she was my mother.