fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #290 ]

⌈ Secret Post #290 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 141 secrets from Secret Submission Post #042.
Secrets Not Posted: 0 broken links, 0 not!secrets, 0 not!fandom.
Next Secret Post: Tomorrow, Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007.
Current Secret Submission Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

20. Oh my god fandomsecrets never needs to discuss domestic abuse again.

Do you all understand that the likelihood of fatality quadruples when the victim flees? Beyond any emotional attachments and issues, it's far more difficult than anyone who hasn't been through it or worked with it can imagine. The fear is gripping, and people like you don't fucking help.

ohnoes because all you can EVER do is flee there's no way you can LEARN TO DEFEND YOURSELF and get a gun, license and some practice or something. oh wait that doesn't matter because fear is GRIPPIIINGGG

nope, just post on fandomsecrets and start wank. that works too. if they want help, ask for it, otherwise, STFU 'cause if all they want is sympathy without doing anything about they're own issues, they don't deserve it.

Do you have any idea how crazy you sound?

So you think every person in that sort of situation should buy a gun? And do what with it? Wave it around? Make things worse? Do you have any idea whether or not a gun even works in that sort of situation, or if it just makes things worse?

Do some damn research before you shoot off your mouth. A lot of people are quick to fire off something snappy when this sort of thing is involved, which I've always found strange given how litle knowledge and experience they have with the matter.

But no, your opinion is worth more, dammit! Even if your advice is the sort that can get a person killed!

it's crazy, but it's something. there are ways of getting out of everything, some people just decide to get up and find them instead of sitting around making horribly sad secrets that has half the internet up in arms when someone says maybe they should do something about it instead of complaining all the time.

The real world is not like your favorite video game. You cannot obtain a weapon, level up, and defeat any obstacle in your path by shooting at it.

Do you have a gun? A license? Do you understand how expensive guns are? A Glock 19, measly 9mm, is 500$. Licensing is around 50$ and requires multiple classes. Do you even know if she's 21 and LEGAL to carry a firearm? Do you know if her father and boyfriend have her under frequent supervision? Do you know ANYTHING about this girl?

No?

then .

How abou you focus your obvious rage and frustration on something OTHER than victim blaming, jackass.

so it's okay to tell the entire internet you're being abused, then tell them nothing of your own situation, and then tell them they can't help because they don't understand the situation, no, all you want is their sympathy and condolences but someone telling you to get off your ass and find something to solve the fucking issue is victim blaming? there are a helluva lot of ways out, she sounds like she doesn't even want to get out.

ohnoes I'm a horrible person who doesn't deserve to live

No, you just have no fucking idea what you're talking about.

I'm not going to enable you with a forum for you horseshit. Bye.

Actually, everyone's sympathy can go fuck itself. I won't say that I didn't appreciate a few of the comments.

But I didn't post this to get OH POOR YOUUUUU woes. I just wanted to vent. You know, that thing I can't do on my real journal.

I didn't want to put this on my journal because I didn't want people to think of me as that weak, horrible person who stays in a bad situation. I'd rather the people whose opinions matter to me think of me as being happy, even if I'm not.

But people like you just went to prove another reason why I can't post shit like this on my journal. Why I have to say these things anonymously. Because of people like you who have no fucking clue what you're talking about, and no capacity for empathy to help you along.

iawtc and the other anonymous comment above.

not with the op buying a gun, but i agree with there being ways to get out. i'm tired of people complaining about their abuse / drug / depression / whatever problems and doing nothing to solve them, it's like the issue is used for attention.

op has obviously researched or asked others for advice. she knows what she needs to do. now she needs to do it or shut up.

Just because you know what to do DOESN'T make it easy. It's obvious you've never been in any of those situations, because it's NOT that easy to do. It sounds simple to say it, but guess what, jackass?

Life isn't simple. Abuse isn't simple. There's nothing wrong with her venting on the internet. If you don't like it, don't read it. She still has her right to post it anonymously and get it off her chest, because it's clear that she really needs to. Obviously she was probably in the wrong to post where a bunch of idiot wankers like you morons could get a hold of it and make her feel like shit, but that doesn't mean you have to be an asshole about it. You don't understand. You don't know as much as you think you do, however much of a terrible blow to your obviously inflated ego it may be. So why don't you just accept that she's gotten it off her chest and move on.

Because shooting the person who's abusing you and getting put in prison for manslaughter is sure a better alternative. Not to mention, you know, living with killing someone for the rest of your live.

Disclaimer: I know it is possible to shoot someone and not kill them. But really, if you pull something like that out in an actual, real abuse situation or fight, chances are, it's not going to be just a small injury.

I hope you get raped. Seriously. Or caught in the most horribly abusive relationship and terrible situation you can possibly get in. You're a fucking idiot, and obviously have no idea what you're talking about, or what these situations are like, so STFU.

Yeah, this person is a total fuckbag, but not cool =\

Because everyone else who has given advice couldn't possibly have been in a similar situation before, amirite? CLEARLY, the only solution is to stay there and take it, because anyone who has every REALLY been abused will spew some horse shit about likelihood of fatality instead of telling her to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

It is hard, and it is fucking scary, but she needs to get the hell out of that situation if it's so bad. You aren't fucking helping by brushing off things other people have said when YOU don't know whether they've been through it or not.

Just because someone doesn't decide to give a life story or doesn't directly say they can relate doesn't mean they don't know what they're talknig about.

Uh huh. In every other comment I've posted I totally didn't say get out. The whole time I've been rooting for her to stay in a dangerous situation that oh my fucking god I might know something about academically rather than just on a knee-jerk emotional level.

I'm not talking about the people on the board giving decent advice, like attempting to find solutions, I'm talking about the radical MORONS that think she's seeking attention for the fuck of it or is a complete retard for not just saying O HAY BYE GUYS or, god forbid, BUY FIREARMS to deal with her abusers.

I may wear my opinion on my sleeve, but at least I don't spew vitriol until I know for a FACT someone's stance on something this delicate.

Your icon is hypnotizing. O.O

[ SECRET POST #290 ]

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