[ SECRET POST #2525 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2525 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 063 secrets from Secret Submission Post #361.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: I think I'm becoming a hoarder

[lynx]

Been there, and I can definitively say it's a symptom of depression and/or anxiety. If it's of any use: You are NOT disgusting, and being too sad or stressed to keep an apartment clean if you live alone is not something childlish.

Maybe you already know this, and there's people in the thread who are telling it to you too, but yes, you need help. Look for a mental help proffesional you can afford; and meanwhile, try to get people you trust to help you clean the mess once in a while. That will be something you look forward to, because (I know this) social anxiety is damn awful, but being lonely is worse, isn't it? It's different, being alone because you want to be alone and it helps you recharge your energies, and being lonely because (you think) nobody cares.

The thing is, there are people who care. There always will be someone who cares. Please take my word on this.

Having someone over will help you manage your flat better the rest of the time, too (because you will know there will be someone coming over to visit) - and when that person (or people) come to help you keep your living quarters orderly, after you finish cleaning, you can treat your friend(s) and you to something nice. It doesn't have to be fancy, just something cool to do as a reward to everyone (including you) - even if it's only watching a movie on streaming together. Procrastinating on cleaning is a sign of an avoidant streak in your anxiety.

As told by the wisdom in Utena, you can have someone else to open your doors for you, but getting out is on you. What worked for me may not be what works for you, but I do know that making an effort to build good memories to balance out the bad ones helps a lot.

Hugs offered if you want them, Anon.