fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2535 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2535 ⌋

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, look, is there some wisdom about having 'common sense' when it comes to personal safety? Sure there is. But considering that most rapists will be someone you know then most 'common sense' goes out the window.

And besides, the post is trying to point out that 'common sense' might be able to save you personally, but it doesn't fix the core problem. Like, for example, a gay guy learning self-defense might prevent him from being gay-bashed, but that hasn't actually fixed the problem has it? It saved HIM, sure, but a person willing to hurt someone for being gay isn't just going to give up because some gay dude fought him off.

Will telling that person to not hurt gay people going to work? Probably not. But the only way things will change is by taking the spotlight off 'common sense' and bring to light the idea that no 'common sense' should ever have to include 'how not to get beaten up for having a boyfriend'.

I don't think that's a very even comparison, though? Because a gay man getting attacked for being gay has a root cause in homophobia, working to eliminate (though I doubt it will ever be 100% eliminated) will stop that.

Telling people to stop raping doesn't actually effect the serial rapists who don't actually give a fuck, because they enjoy the control. It's rooted in something different then homophobia is.

You don't think that a desire to rape women isn't rooted in sexism? It's a much better comparison than comparing rape to stealing, that's for fucking sure.

And sure, trying to change attitudes towards womena and consent won't stop the real scumbags of society, but since when is that a good reason to not do something? Telling people not to murder won't stop serial killers, right?

For some people, yes, but I don't think that's the only reason, or else you'd never hear about young boys/men getting raped.

You're right; telling people not to murder doesn't stop serial killers, because they literally don't care.

Actually, you'd be surprised. People laugh off women raping boys/men because haha, boys never say no and women can't have sexual power over males, that's silly!

And boys/men who are raped by other men are shamed because that's a 'womans' crime and is sometimes even done so a man can have power over another man and make him his 'bitch'.

Is it the only reason that people rape? Of course not. Is it a powerful reason and a major source of people dimissing rape? Fuck yes.

da

I'd say the cultural factors are similar, though. Working against the enabling aspect of society.

Fun story about "common sense" is that when it comes to trying to protect children, "common sense" actually puts them in more danger. The best example I can think of is that letting a kid walk home is often safer than insisting they get a ride from a teacher, because guess which situation is more likely to result in them getting molested or assaulted?

I'm not saying common sense is completely useless, but I can see why some people have such a gut reaction against it. I mean, my mom was paranoid as all fuck when I was a child, but looking back, some of the things she did in her desperation to protect me actually put me in even more danger (and that's before going into the indirect costs of her paranoia when I wasn't in danger, i.e. no after school activities, no friends over, no going over to friend's houses, no getting a job, etc etc). I try to take the rational approach in all things in life, but sometimes that means having to stop myself from screaming SHUT UP at people who tie themselves up so strongly in "common sense measures against sexual assault" because of how not sensible they really are.

[ SECRET POST #2535 ]

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