fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2607 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2607 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Shaun of the Dead]

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13. http://i.imgur.com/Lnyxfbz.jpg
[link for porny, doujinshi]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

14. [SPOILERS for DRAMAtical Murder]

[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

15. [WARNING for rape]

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16. [WARNING for rape, pedophilia]

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17. [WARNING for molestation]

[Gatchaman Crowds]

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18. [WARNING for dub-con]

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19. [WARNING for molestation]
http://i.imgur.com/tm7SaaX.jpg
[Shingeki no Kyojin, molestation scene? in image]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #372.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I think if I were you, I'd ask her (in a very calm, curious, 100% non-defensive way) why she wants your input. I'd ask her if it would affect her decision, or if she just wants to touch base and see how I feel about it. And then I'd listen very carefully to her answer.

Have to be honest here, OP-- I would be surprised if this relationship lasted the long term. The issue of whether or not you're right to not want your GF to do nude modeling or cam work is separate from the fact that you're not comfortable with it, and it doesn't sound like you will ever be. You're correct that it is her choice, and so long as what she's doing is legal, it isn't your business. (If it were illegal and you're living together, then it would be your business because you'd be directly affected by any criminal repercussions.) But bottom line is, if something she does is a deal breaker for you, then the relationship is over. So is it a deal breaker?

I think so far you're doing the right thing. You're being honest with your GF that you're not comfortable with it, and at the same time you're acknowledging that it is her choice. I'd also add what you said about loving her. Please don't lie. Please don't pressure her to choose between you and the job, and please don't make it into a thing about her not loving you enough to give up the job. Those are all pathways to doom, my friend.

I don't think there's a way to skate through this without someone being unhappy sometime, but it's not an impossible problem to overcome. It WILL take some delicate handling and a lot of understanding and communication, however.

Best of luck to you.

I'd agree with a lot of this. I don't think there's necessarily any indication of whether they can last long term, but they DO seem to be at a point of needing to address HOW to handle major life differences of opinions about life decisions in productive manners. It sounds like they did manage to skate by a bit with the modeling to get through it, but now they're up against a similar issue and decision-time again for a second round, and the healthy relationship needs to develop expectations and ground rules both for how to discuss such things, and how to function once a decision is made.

[ SECRET POST #2607 ]

Re: So I have a problem...

Re: So I have a problem...