fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2617 ]

[ SECRET POST #2617 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2617 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

11.

__________________________________________________

Notes:

As a note, social justice is not a fandom. Tumblr itself is not a fandom.

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 051 secrets from Secret Submission Post #374.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

DA

It's not sneaky, it's really annoying and makes the story more convoluted than it needs to be. Plus puts peoples attention away from what you are actually wanting advice about. Next time either straight up tell the story or leave out the bullshit "I may have liked teehee"

SA

*lied not liked.

Fine. I will tell the story in it's entirety and hope it doesn't change the responses.

I have a moral question. I believe I may have crossed a line.

Let me set the scene: I am a 29yo man who is in a relationship with a 29yo woman.
The woman, My girlfriend, has a 20yo cousin.
This cousin is very very hot.

I am in love with my girlfriend and very much attracted to her, but I have on many occasions she has noticed how attractive my girlfriends cousin is.

Today I have found... certain materials. sexually explicit materials that the cousin has placed publicly online under a fake name. I then made use of these materials and... you know, took care of my business.

How terrible should I feel? This is sketch as fuck, yes? I am a terrible human being, Aren't I? Or am I? What do we think? Where is the line on this and did I cross it?

Disclaimer: The structure of the above is totally accurate, I tried to throw some fibs in there so people would not suspect the gender of the creepy fuck is male. It seems much worse to me that I am a male. It was to protect the myself and stuff.

Now I am curious if any opinions will change not that you've been outed as male. To see if F!S has indeed a double standard.

Personally, I still think you are testing the waters of the Rubicon.

To be honest, and this is just my opinion (Still OP, btw), but I'm not totally sure it would really be a double standard. At least not an unjustifiable one. I don't know why, but I genuinely think the situation reads as much less creepy when I switched the pronouns so it was a woman. I really don't know why.

Some people probably will think it's worse because you're male, but I think that's bullshit. You are not related to this person, this person is not underage, this person knowingly put up sexually explicit material publicly online - there is no wrong here. I mean it'll make family gatherings a little weird, but that's about it.

Oh, I don't see that branch of her family super often, and I'm smart enough not to be a drooling idiot or super awkward creep in person.

Thank you, btw. That actually goes to everyone typing comments telling me I'm not a super creep. I still feel kinda creepy, but I feel less like a massive monster.

ayrt

I mean it's a little creepy, but then isn't all porn a little creepy? I don't think you've crossed a line or are a monster or anything.

this doesnt read any differently to me, whatever

pictures on the internet

was it r/gonewild?

I don't know what that is. but no, it was on a certain pay-per-view type website.

is she making money off it / a professional? because seriously if the cousin is doing it for cash then i don't see how it's different from like, dating the cousin of a porn star. so what?

She is.

I dunno. My girlfriends younger cousin seems like she should be off limits for that sort of thing.

if you dated the cousin of your favorite porn star, would you stop fapping to her?

I might? I dunno. but in this scenario, I met the girl as my girlfriends cousin, and then found the porn. That seems like it matters.

I dunno. You're probably right.

I'm going with everyone else and saying getting yourself off to publically available, sexually explicit images is normal and okay. That's what they are put online for.

Googling friends/family deliberately in order to find sexually explicit materials on them, now that's a different matter. That's where it gets weird and creepery and seems worse if a male does it, because more stalkers/abusers are male and it's a huge red flag.

The masturbation, that seems actually a little better because you're a man. Although women masturbate as well, some women don't, and I think the percentage is higher than men who don't masturbate. So it's a normal urge, and many men get off to their gf's family/friends.

It's the googling you should feel skeevy about. The masturbation is fine, although you wouldn't want to admit it to your gf unless you're really open and close and it wouldn't upset her.

I was under the impression there was no Googling for her, if he found her under a fake name. Sounded more like a porn search then recognizing the cousin in photos to me?

No I heard about the porn and her fake name and the website from a third party, which I then, eventually took to google and found her part of the site. More out of curiosity to be perfectly honest. The wanking just sort of followed.

Tbh, as if my bf told me he jerked off to my cousin, I'd be like "nope" and dump him. If it was a famous person/pornstar, whatever, but a person I know, a family member, is a totally different avenue.

I'm the anon who complained about the "my friend" screen. My opinion doesn't change either.

If you keep looking at said materials and wanking, then yeah, you're crossing the line. Your gf will eventually find out and shit will hit the fan (gfs/bfs always eventually find out. Somewhere at sometime, you will lax on your internet cleaning and boom! Everything will come crashing down).

I think by wanking off to her cousin, you kinda fucked yourself over to begin with... As there is a good chance you'll be picturing her naked the next time you see her and the fact that you jerked off to her.

You're not a terrible human being, but the future with your gf could now be up in the air if your not careful.

So you got off to sexually explicit materials placed online by an adult woman, okay.

Don't be a dick and treat this cousin any differently if/when you see her, or leer, or make veiled comments, etc. That's what would make you a fucking creep. Keep your shit private and treat everyone like people worthy of respect and if you do that, ignore everyone here trying to give you hangups or make you out to be the poster child for skeevy assholes everywhere. You didn't do anything wrong so far.

If I had a boyfriend who did something like this, I would probably dump him.

I have a sister who models, and she's done some swimsuit and lingerie shoots. I'm proud of her and I think she's beautiful, and I know most men look at them and think she's sexy, and that's okay too.

I'd have no problem with a man I was in a relationship masturbating or watching porn (made by consenting adults). What I would have a problem with is this person meeting my sister, finding her attractive, talking to other people about that, tracking down images or videos of her, and getting off on them.

If you're dating me, I don't want you thinking of members of my family while you touch your dick. It's disrespectful to me, to our relationship, and to my family.

What most people have said - who cares? This is on the same level as wanking to a random stranger on the 'net, and frankly, not worth worrying about. Just keep it to yourself and if you really think it's a 'big deal', don't do it again.

Coming in late but...

She's a professional porn actress? I don't really see a big deal, there.

However...

From the side of the GF, I'd be pretty skeeved to find out my partner was wanking to one of my family members. I mean, one of my exes was actually hitting on my mom at one point, and I had to outright tell him, "Stop doing this." (That particular ex has ... a lot of social skills problems. Along with a lot of sexist issues.) So I wouldn't necessarily say to worry about it but I'd suggest not continuing with it, because if your girlfriend happens to walk in on you (and that CAN happen, no matter how much you try to prevent it) and notice what you're jerking off to... I don't see any way that would go well.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2617 ]

Re: Crossed a line?

+1000

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?

Re: Crossed a line?