fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2650 ]

[ SECRET POST #2650 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2650 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So, we all know lots of girls squee over fictional men who touch each other a lot, care about or worry about each other a lot, and generally show each other lots of affection. We think it's cute, or sweet, or heartwarming, or hot.

But how do guys feel about it? Does it make you uncomfortable, because guys aren't supposed to be touchy-feely? Does it make you feel better and reassured, because seeing characters do that helps counter the idea that guys aren't supposed to be touchy-feely? Does it depend on how you were raised?

Personally those types of characters never really register as "people" to me, it's like I can completely accept how they are and how they function within their world without making any connection to real life. Not because they're bad characters or something, it's just how it is.

Some canons have really touchy-feely characters, and some don't. I guess I find this dynamic interesting, but I never thought about it as a male thing or a female thing. (I've been told my father comes from a time where men couldn't be touchy-feely, but that seems really far away to me.)

Depends on how it's done? There's definitely a lot of touching that goes on in my different and various male friend groups, and it depends on the context and the company as to how believable I'll find it in fiction.

I'll see a lot more hugging and intimate cuddling from my queer friends, as a lot of people might expect, but it doesn't happen all that often. My nerdy friends almost never get physical with each other at all, to the point of awkwardness if someone accidentally does touch someone else. With new acquaintances (and therefore default assumption of hetero) in general a shoulder or a back pat is a pretty casual greeting that I get/give pretty often, and hugging isn't a thing that never happens. What's interesting is that the more sport-oriented friends I have are the ones that are the most touchy-feely/physical, but they also tend to touch in the least intimate way possible; back pats, head rubs, shoving, play fighting etc.

So yeah, it depends? If there's something like excessive shoulder rubbing or someone is trying to hold hands with someone else or touch someone else in a way that seems ...I dunno, off?... to me, then I stop seeing them as theoretical real people and start seeing them as self-insert fantasy though.

I also have to say that it depends on the culture they're supposed to be from as well, because it wouldn't be out of place even for Japanese teenagers to kiss each other on the cheek and cuddle and hold hands. I saw plenty of that while I was living there.

Does it make you feel better and reassured, because seeing characters do that helps counter the idea that guys aren't supposed to be touchy-feely?

Yes, I like it because it's bullshit that only women can (or are supposed to) be touchy-feely. I love seeing touchy-feely characters in general though, which might be slightly odd because I'm not that sort of person myself. It does appeal to me, but I don't feel comfortable with expressing myself that way.

If only we had characters comparable to Starsky and Hutch on tv right now...

You're a dude?!

No no, I misread the subject, thought it read “How do you guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?” I didn't even look back at the thread until now so didn't realize I wasn't supposed to comment. Makes more sense now... Lmao.

I like them, but I mainly like them only in older works. Like, pre-2000. Nowadays, it seems writers are all too exposed to the homoerotic and female-demographic potential of these kinds of interactions, and their self-awareness always bleeds into their writing and ruins the natural-ness so it feels like the guys are performing.

Thiiiiiiiis.

I like it, since characters who show no emotion at all, not even nuanced ones, are kinda really boring to me. And I think a lot of things go too far in the 'incredibly stoic' front a lot. So I like that there's a counter-balance, even though it does go far sometimes.

The whole 'aren't supposed to be touchy-feely' thing is what bugs me.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2650 ]

How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

I've honestly never considered this in gendered terms

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?

Re: How do guys feel about touchy-feely fictional guys?