case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2014-04-07 07:40 pm

[ SECRET POST #2652 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2652 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 041 secrets from Secret Submission Post #379.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
diet_poison: (Default)

Re: Vent

[personal profile] diet_poison 2014-04-08 12:06 am (UTC)(link)
Do you have forums where you can meet other asexual people who want romance?

Uh, as for a vent, I usually have some but actually nothing is really pissing me off right now. Except my chronic inability to make myself wake up and the resulting impending failure of one of my classes. I want to vent at my brain and body for sticking me with that bullshit. >:C

Re: Vent

(Anonymous) 2014-04-08 12:17 am (UTC)(link)
ayrt

ayrt
To be honest a lot of the asexual forums I've been on are full of people I do not ever want to meet. I kind of hate the whole asexual culture online. I use the label as a helpful shortcut but don't think it's like a defining part of my identity and personality, which is opposite of the attitude a lot of asexual forums and communities seem to have.

And to make matters more complicated, I don't particularly hate sex (theoretically, since I've never actually had sex) I simply have no interest and do not want to participate. However, I would never 100% rule it out of a relationship. I just could never 100% guarantee it would be something in the relationship either. So I wouldn't mind dating a sexual person, it just seems like everyone wants a guarantee that I'll have sex with them or be interested in sex and if I can't give them that they bail.
diet_poison: (Default)

Re: Vent

[personal profile] diet_poison 2014-04-08 12:48 am (UTC)(link)
*nods* that's totally fair.

Speaking as a sexual person...yeah, if I were in a relationship with someone who said he wasn't sure he'd ever want sex, I would probably have to back out. It sucks, yeah, but every person has the right to look for something that will fulfill them. I do, however, know that there are asexual people in successful long-term relationships, some of whom enjoy sex with their partners, and some of whom don't have any sex at all. I know there are people you're compatible with and I wish you the best of luck, anon.
nyxelestia: Rose Icon (Default)

Re: Vent

[personal profile] nyxelestia 2014-04-08 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
Er, what's wrong with asexual culture online? Because I've been thinking of dipping my toes into that for quite a while but now I'm wary of the idea...

Re: Vent

(Anonymous) 2014-04-08 08:06 am (UTC)(link)
da

persecution complexes, their insistence that asexuals are more oppressed than LGBT people (or that they are oppressed by LGBT people), the stupid categorizing of non-asexuals as "sexuals" and lumping straight and gay people in the same oppressive category, the fact that they will say they're asexual but willing to have sex/have a libido/masturbate/occasionally are sexually attracted (wtf is the point of calling youself asexual!?), the existence of "demisexuals", their dumb obsession with cake, the list goes on...
nyxelestia: Rose Icon (Default)

Re: Vent

[personal profile] nyxelestia 2014-04-08 03:30 pm (UTC)(link)
That sucks. :( Thanks for letting me know! :)

Re: Vent

(Anonymous) 2014-04-08 03:52 pm (UTC)(link)
I get the masturbation thing if it isn't attached to anything (basically boredom wanking), but agree with pretty much everything else. Especially the dumb as hell cake meme.

Re: Vent

(Anonymous) 2014-04-08 02:15 pm (UTC)(link)
ayrt

Kind of late in replying but...my problem has been that a lot of the asexual community seems to view sex as bad and horrible and horrifying and 'dirty' and have this weird superiority complex above "sexuals". There is also a lot of judgment and persecution going on about the "right way" to be asexual. And, as I mentioned above, a lot of people seem to view it as a huge singular all important part of their identity when I just don't view my sexuality in that way.

There are probably good people mixed in there, but the overall trends and loudest voices just rub me the wrong way and what I've seen is not a crowd I want to be a part of.
nyxelestia: Rose Icon (Default)

Re: Vent

[personal profile] nyxelestia 2014-04-08 03:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Yikes, that sucks. I can see why you avoid it and I'm reconsidering poking it, myself. Thanks for the heads up! :)