fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2659 ]

[ SECRET POST #2659 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2659 ⌋

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My sexuality changes depending on where I am in my menstrual cycle. With monthly regularity I swing between gay and straight, with my most default setting being bi. Does anyone else get this???

Yes. Except I don't swing between gay and straight. I'm bi all month long.

How does it change for you?

Sometimes I'm more interested in vagina than penis. Usually I want vagina near the beginning of my cycle.

AYRT In retrospect that was a stupid question. Thanks for putting it so bluntly for me ;)

Interesting. Essentially then we have similar experiences, a preference changing with hormones. Is it very regular for you? Or an occasional thing?

hmm. What parts of the cycle are which?

I'm definitely straight, but my sex drive (for lack of a better phrase) is cyclical. like today I'm really feelin' it, and I'm waiting on my period any day now. :( it's kinda annoying.

About once a cycle, just before my period I get two days of being solely into guys and girls doing nothing for me. Once every three months I get two days half way through my cycle of only being into girls and not wanting anything to do with guys.

Rest of the time I'm bi, with an even split between men and women.

My sex drive does that too! It can be so frustrating :S

You are bi. You don't have to be "I'm 50% into dick and 50% into vag" all the time to be bi. If you like women and you like men, you're bi.

Sure okay. I have a whole host of reasons why I phrased my question the way I did originally. Frankly though, I am really bad at explaining myself, and the chances of me being eloquent enough to do so without causing some sort of hideous flame war is zero.

So, yes, fine, I will let you dictate my sexual preference to me, despite it not accurately representing the nuance of my own personal experience.

Everyone please note that the question should simply read 'my sexual preferences change according to my menstrual cycle'.

While you sound a bit huffy, I agree you have a point.

AYRT Sorry yes, that was a bit huffy. It's a bit of a flash point subject for me.

I'm not dictating your sexual preference, I'm giving you an appropriate label if you are looking for one. If you aren't, fine. But the notion that you have to be sexually attracted to men and women equally all the time or you aren't bi is a stereotype and misconception that irritates me and many other people who identify as bi. So, be as nuanced as you want when explaining the ins and outs of the way you experience sexual attraction. But, if you are attracted to men and women, you are most likely bisexual.

Re: Hormones and sexuality

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-15 00:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

fingalsanteater - 2014-04-15 00:43 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

chardmonster - 2014-04-15 17:28 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

diet_poison - 2014-04-15 01:21 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

fingalsanteater - 2014-04-15 01:41 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

inevitableentresol - 2014-04-15 02:18 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

diet_poison - 2014-04-15 13:39 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Hormones and sexuality

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-15 03:59 (UTC) - Expand

That's interesting. I haven't heard of that.

yeahhh, it's annoying, like "stop no not wanting to think about that now" and also knowing that biologically, it's my genome's last-ditch attempt to get me pregnant before losing the opportunity for a while, and I'm like "but no I do not want that" and my body doesn't care

I don't change the same way you do, but when it's that time of the month for me, I read a lot of dirty fanfics. I'm otherwise asexual and have no interest in ever doing anything myself.

Yes. All women have difference in the people they are attracted to during different stage of their menstrual cycle varying degrees. It's a very well studied part of female sexuality.

Straight women also end up attracted to different types of men accordingly.

Edited 2014-04-15 00:47 (UTC)

Do you have more info on this? I sounds like an interesting thing to read up on.

This should get you started, but just googling "differences in attraction during menstrual cycle" leads to a plethora of studies from peer-reviewed journals.

https://www.apa.org/monitor/2011/03/hormones.aspx

I can only think of a single study I've seen that included gay women in their sample (though that was a while ago; there are probably more now), and I'm pretty sure that's behind a paywall for lay people so... how you want to interpret that is up to you.

Ooh yes, I remember reading this. But I think the research was quite a while ago?

The study methods are hilarious. They get women to sniff little bottles of men's sweat and rate how horny it gets them.

Edited 2014-04-15 02:21 (UTC)

That particular study has also been reproduced with underwear, t-shirts that men worked out in... a few other things.

Actually that link references a lot of studies that have been done on the subject, but yes, sometimes psychological research gets a little silly.

Hey! I wrote about a similar thing in GC a few days ago in a thread re: sexuality is not always clear-cut. Lemme dig it up and condense/edit for this discussion:

My sex drive turns way way way the hell up around my periods, and sometimes, walking down the street, it's like ALL I SEE ARE PRETTY WOMEN, and other times CUTE DUDES EVERYWHERE. Once in a great while everyone is fucking beautiful and I just gotta sit down and drink some cold water.

So, it sounds similar in terms of menstrual cycle affecting attraction, but less predictable in results. The gender I notice or fantasize about usually remains the same throughout, but not always. Also, the genders don't alternate or have any other discernible pattern each time. (I have slightly irregular periods, as well.)

I only really started acknowledging these attractions when they seriously kicked into unignorable overdrive, about 5 years after my first period. I'm self-identifying with the larger trend over the short-term fluctuations. Anyway, tl;dr: I am a bisexual werewolf (a phrase which I realized after posting the first time, gets some of the gist across by ear, but doesn't actually encompass the concept that well. But it's super fun to say!).

Nah. I get more turned on closer to my menstrual cycle than other times. I'm bi myself but most of the time, I fantasize about women more than men and it doesn't change near my period.

Same for me exactly.

Not monthly, but I swing over the course of months or years between being gay and straight, with my default being bi.

It's really hard to handle when I'm in a relationship and I suddenly don't find their gender attractive for months at a time. I feel so terrible about it and try to make it up by being more affectionate in other ways.

I certainly have times where I have a preference for one gender over another. But I've always considered myself bi. I don't think it has to do with my hormones since it can go on for some time.

I'm more or less bi, but I basically only have a perceptible sex drive right when I ovulate.

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