fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2665 ]

[ SECRET POST #2665 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2665 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 064 secrets from Secret Submission Post #381.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Pretty much anything by David Gonterman, most of which can be found here. Without going into who he is as a person (long story short, he was like the ur!Chris-Chan of his day), his stories are... something else.

His original work -which he focuses on exclusively these days- isn't much different in terms of quality, either. But there's just something about his fan fics that's both a textbook example of "What Not To Do" in fan fic and a horrifying trainwreck you can't quite look away from.

ALSO! I completely forgot 'My Inner Life' by LinksQueen.

Because where else will you find one of the biggest black hole self-inserts to ever exist, incredible "artistic license" with sexual intercourse (hint: if you're a female and you're gushing *that* much/often during intercourse, you *may* wanna see a OB/GYN) and biology in general, and gem-worthy advice like this:

"And one piece of advice on a personal note, if you and your husband make love a lot while your pregnant, you'll help make the baby stronger."

I wanted to love "My Inner Life" so much, because I was a completely wackaloon Zelda fan back in the day, but it's hard for me to get into badfic if it's long. Maybe someday. "legolas by laura" is still the queen of my heart.

My Inner Life is amazing. Favourite version is a dramatic reading by manwithoutabody. "PLEASURE!"

Gonterman? Didn't he have a kickstarter about a shitty comic about a girl and a Don Bluth-esque mouse?

Yeah, he did. IIRC, it only got maybe $20-odd, if nothing at all.

Yeah, I'm surprised it got money at all.

(reply from suspended user)

Oh, Ratliff. I must have read mstings of twenty of his fics.

And then there was that lemon he wrote between Marissa and Wesley. That was fucked up.

Funny thing about Gonterman, I vaguely remember when 'Sailor Moon USA' was first posted and even as a little kid, I knew it was terrible crap (the Space Ghost MSTing of it is still one of my favorite things to this day). And there's nothing like the mention/remembering of Davey-Kins to date myself horribly. Ughhh.

And yes, I remember the Marissa Picard series. I wasn't involved in Star Trek, but his stories were one of those things you'd come across in most MSTing communities. And they were *hilarious*, too.

Sailor Moon: American Kitsune is one of the most impressive things I've ever read. From Chapter Ten, after the self-insert hero has fought off a Power Rangers villain with a bunch of homophobic slurs:

Raye: Mind if I ask you a personal question?

David slides out from the Jeffrey's Tube in the Lamboghini Tardis
to answer: Tell me your question first, then I'll tell you if I
mind or not.

Raye: Well, what was it with you and Zoisite? We all know he's
really a gay man, but he doesn't do the stuff that'll get people
to go homophobic on him.

David: You didn't know him about a decade ago. In fact, Zoey
was the one who gave me a really nasty experience with the
homosexual lifestyle back in Junior High.

Raye is giving her newest teammate her undivided attention at
this time. She did sense something from him she couldn't put a
finger on yet, and it was rising at this point. She could feel
this fox boy being an outcast--berumcumin (sp?)--long before he
grew an extra pair of ears and two tails. And it was caused by
the Negaverse!

"I didn't have the best luck with the girls. In fact I wouldn't
have a snowball's chance in Hell of having a girl fall in love
with me. So, when Zoisite come to town pushing his Homosexual
agenda and said that one in every ten people are destined to be
gay, every school kid in that school pointed at me. Naturally
that had them pushing their doctrine down their throats, and as a
kid, I couldn't tell them from every other bully in that school.
It was through the grace of whatever God I had at the time to get
out of there with my virginity intact. But, the damage to my
character was done, I'm afraid. The rumor mill ran twenty-four
hours a day on my "homosexuality" and I was branded a Gay without
any say on my own. Even members of my own family believed it.
Heck, I would have sex with all five of you right in front of
them and they'll *still* call me a Gay! So could you come
accusing me of being a homophobe? Can you really . . . blame
me?"

"No on both counts, FoxFire," said Luna, speaking for all of the
Scouts, who kinda listened in (The majority were in tears by
now). "I wouldn't consider you homophobic, racist, or sexist;
especially after you told us that. You were hurt by the
Negaverse in a manner I wouldn't expect. And by someone you will
meet again . . . "

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2665 ]

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

Re: Inspired by Secret 2: "Legendary" Badfic

TW: Gonterman, homophobia