[ SECRET POST #2742 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2742 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 094 secrets from Secret Submission Post #392.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: What are your thoughts on non-binary genders?

[(Anonymous)]

On a personal level, relating to myself, I never really fully grasped the idea of gender. Sex, yes, the biological differences, fine, but gender is not ... I tend not to be good at social ideas. I get it at an intellectual level, but I've never really understood how you have a non-physical sensation of male/female/otherness. I get that people do, I just don't know what it feels like/how it works.

I think, from what I've read, that broadly speaking I'm probably agender, in the sense that I don't have any real firmly fixed gender identity, but mostly I'm fine with female since those are the bits I came with and I've never really felt a desire to argue with my body about this. I did/do sometimes think about physical androgyny, mostly because the thought of not having soft dangly bits to get in the way of stuff appeals to me, but it's nothing more than the odd thought.

I'm also fairly definitely asexual, which may have some bearing on my lack of response to the ideas of sex/gender? I'm not sure about that, but generally it does tend to mean that soft dangly bits of either type are really just that to me - soft dangly bits that make physical activities occasionally awkward and that you're not allowed to show in public because decency. The ideas that get attached to them other than that are pretty universally weird to me, and even the decency one is a bit weird sometimes.

In general, though, I don't mind what gender other people introduce themselves as, regardless of its relationship with what sex their body (currently) is. The thing you feel in your head isn't necessarily the same as the physical thing around you, and while I often have trouble understanding that thing or trying to imagine what it's like, I also have this trouble with any number of things people feel in their heads. There are so many sensations and thought-shapes that people describe, and I can see that they really do feel/think/exist that way to themselves, but I can't make those shapes fit inside my own head. The shapes people are inside their own heads are so weird, gender is the least of it. So, as long as that shape stays in their head and isn't asking to be in mine, I'm pretty fine with it? I mean, so long as they're only saying they feel that way and not that I do/should, it's all good. Often not comprehensible to me, but good.

The terms and words people come up with, I generally don't mind them either. Non-physical ideas, they're all weird and hard to translate into words, everything from emotions on up to social constructs, so I understand why people spend so much time struggling for a word to describe the thing they're feeling in a way other people might understand. Having a generally-understood one-word key term to at least open the conversation is something I can understand people striving for, even if I think a lot of the individual efforts are strange and perhaps over-specialised for a topic that resists a lot of specificity.

The whole topic really just baffles me, though. Not that it's a bad or worthless one, just one that causes me a lot of confusion and one that I don't tend to think about a lot unless it turns out to be pertinent to someone around me.