fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2742 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2742 ⌋

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I've had one for just over sixteen years now. For reference, my parents were Republicans, of the old-school moderate sort who'd be dismissed as RINOs and driven out of the party these days, and my mother was a staunch Roman Catholic whose memory predated Vatican II.

Things my husband and I have done differently from my parents:

- We didn't raise our daughter in any particular religion; we've just tried to explain what we could to her about those that exist and teach her to be honest, responsible and considerate of others.

- Ditto for political parties and philosophies, for the most part. (She's shaping up to be more liberal than either of us in a lot of ways. I blame or credit Tumblr.)

- We've been very open with her about matters of sex and biology, and have tried to approach it more from a common-sense perspective than a moral one.

- We haven't pampered her. This was, admittedly, largely by necessity--we're just not as well-off as my parents were--but I'm pleased with the end result. My daughter is much less materialistic and wasteful than I was at her age, and will be far better-equipped to handle money and make do with limited resources.

Things I've done the same or similar:

- I've tried to get her to take some interest in history (though the history she's learning has a less U.S.-centric, American Exceptionalism sort of spin than what I got from my parents.)

- I've tried to teach her the importance of personal responsibility, which is one conservative value I do still believe carries some weight--though I think I understand better than my parents why government assistance and social programs are also legitimate and important, and I've tried to pass that along, too.

- I haven't taught her to hate or discriminate against anyone. My parents were old-fashioned, privileged and held to some pretty outdated ideas, but they were not hateful, bigoted people. They believed in respecting other human beings and according them the same rights we enjoyed, even if they didn't personally like or approve of them for whatever reason; they did not believe that we were inherently better than other people or that their personal opinions trumped everything else.

- I've tried to teach her how to disagree civilly and constructively with others. My parents welcomed Democrats into their home as good people and lifelong friends despite their political differences. As I've recently seen it put, the difference between conservatives and liberals used to be a disagreement over how to solve problems we all agreed needed solving. IMO we need more of that kind of thinking today.

Ah, the common-sense approach to sex and biology is something I forgot to mention! I definitely want to do that for my kids...I remember when I started menstruating it was all very mysterious and scary. My mom had very vaguely told me what was going to happen but that was it, no telling me about details or even how to use things like pads or tampons...I don't really blame her since she was trying her best to do one better than how she was raised (HER mom had a very Victorian sensibility about bodily functions and apparently my mom had NO warning about anything regarding puberty) but I'd want to do better for my kids. Heck, if it's awkward there's plenty of factual books/pamphlets/whatever written for all reading levels, which can be a great starting place if nothing else.

I learned about sex by hearing vague rumors and looking up the details in the encyclopedia XD

[ SECRET POST #2742 ]

Re: Things you plan on doing when/if you have kids

Re: Things you plan on doing when/if you have kids