[ SECRET POST #2798 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2798 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 071 secrets from Secret Submission Post #400.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

I mean funny ones, not wanky ones.

I'll start.

A whole clan in a game I play has been convinced I'm a lesbian for three weeks. I'm not a lesbian. I'm not even female. It's not my fault they think so, though. I found out today because one of the clan members whispered me to let me know that I didn't need to 'pretend to be male' in clan chat since they're 'all girls here,' the clan leader especially vetted them all to make sure. What. I find out the clan leader who recruited me is a huge SJW, and she's been telling everyone that I'm playing a male toon to avoid creepy male players and to not 'out' me. So I go to her and tell her there's been some kind of misunderstanding, when I told her I had a girlfriend I meant I was a man in a hetero relationship, not a lesbian. She then proceeded to insist that I must be a woman because 'men are assholes' and I was 'too nice to be male' and she wouldn't believe me until I 'proved it' by sending pictures. I mentioned this is like men asking women for pics or ur not a real grl and her reply was something like 'see, if you were a man you wouldn't know that's problematic'

I'm still laughing.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

wow

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

Okay, that's hilarious.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

That's not funny to me, that's just sad. That just means she was an impressionable girl that got suckered in because of the "welcoming, open-minded" attitude, and was spoon-fed bullshit until she spouted it on command. :/ That last reply just says she has no actual thought behind it.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

No, she's a woman in her 40s. It's a text-based game, not a recent mmo or anything. I joined the clan after chatting for a while in the main channel, since clans offer noobs clan bonuses and the one she was in had a decent middling level which is really good for a newbie. Had no idea what I was walking into

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

Christ, I know this is supposed to be funny, but it's just sad to me.

Dear Lord…

I will never, ever understand these types of SJWs.

I'm a woman. I'm mixed race. But guess what? I have a sweet little brother and a white mother I love to death. And I will FIGHT you if you try to insist that all men or all white people are evil or racist or sexist or horrible. Fuck off. If you say that, YOU are the one that is horrible.

I'm glad you have a sense of humor though dude!

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

They're nice and fun people otherwise, which is why 'you must be female because men are dicks' was so unexpected. I don't think its the whole clan either, only the leader. I can't blame the clan members for believing what she told them, why would she lie? She doesn't think she's lying, either

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

I saw a tumblr post about how all white people need to admit that they're racist, and *then* change themselves. It hurt my head that it got so many reblogs.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[kallanda_lee]

That's insane.


The funny/weirdest thing was this girl who was horrified by the fact I called myself fat (which I am), but she thought I shouldn't say it about myself. I even ended up writing a column about that particular incident.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

That sounds like a good story. Is there any more to it?

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[chardmonster]

OH man. Something like this happened to me at Catholic church school when I was a teenager. We were doing some kind of icebreaking exercise where we all shared an adjective for ourselves that started with the same letter as our name.

I picked Abnormal A--------. Keep in mind I wasn't thinking of weird as an insult, just that I'm weird as hell. In high school you want to be weird, because what society tells kids should be normal is pretty fucked up and shallow.

Adults were Very Concerned but then at lunch the nice lady who was visiting came up to me and told me she got it now.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

Well rules of the internet require you to pony up the pictures and come back to use with the reaction.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

Maybe in a few weeks, I think they might kick me out and I want those clan buffs..

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[case]

"You're too social/socially aware to be male, you must be a butch girl, I refuse to believe otherwise" has happened to me before.

I was like uh ok believe what you want? It really makes no difference to me!

(The worst part is when they're like YOU MUST BE A GIRL then you mention you're not straight and they're like OH WELL THAT EXPLAINS IT! WELCOME IN THEN! wargghhhh stereotypes everywhere)

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

The thing that strikes me the most is that you must have been a BUTCH girl.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

The person who disclaimed at length on a wedding website about how they asked for the pronouns of everyone they met, and if anyone didn't want to respond they were happy to explain to them about trans and non-binary issues. They didn't say if there was a level of interaction triviality beyond which they didn't ask, or if they really did mean they asked the checkout clerk for their pronouns whenever they went shopping.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

That's only funny because it's so obvious you made it up.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[kaijinscendre]

Really? That sounds pretty likely to me. People used to think I was a guy on WoW all the time. And I even played a female toon. And I met some fairly...zealous guild leaders that would rather say you are lying about who you are than admit they were wrong.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

Lies detected.

Cool story, bro.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[herpymcderp]

loooool wat. Thanks for the laugh, OP. That's just amazing.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[silvereriena]

I do wonder how many people think I'm a guy when I'm playing as one of my male characters in games.

Uuuh don't have any stories personally but that link from ages ago about how white people using rice cookers to steam things is cultural appropriation still amuses me.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

I actually use them to cook rice to go with Chinese-food-inna-bag. (Trader Joe's has some really good orange chicken that just needs to be put in the oven for twenty minutes and have the sauce poured on it.) Cultural appropriation like whoa.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[(Anonymous)]

Sort of SJW-ee, but...there was a story of an 'otherkin' who got fired from her first job because she got on all fours and growled/barked at customers because they asked her if the store had stocked some more Pepsi, lol. She got all huffy and felt like she was being discriminated against. I know it's sad, but it cracks me up every time.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[ariakas]

I don't know that women wanting to be in their own clan to avoid harassment is so much "SJW" as it is a depressing reflection of the tenor a lot of online gaming communities have toward female players.

I've been in exactly the inverse situation of you: waaaay back in ye olden days of Enemy Territory the clan I joined refused to be believe I was female, and repeated references to boyfriends/hot dudes/dicks got me (jokingly, I hope) referred to as "the gay one". When I finally got the chance to tell the leader "no for real though, I'm a girl" he responded that there was "no way" that was true, because I was "too good" to be a girl. Then insinuated that I was pretending to be a girl on the internet to get off.

"Too nice" to be a man or "too good" to be a girl? The former might be sexist bias, but it's likely bias due to the horrible experiences a lot of women have had playing MP. The latter I sincerely doubt came from repeated bad experiences with female players, since there were literally none (at least outwardly) aside from me on our server. It was just straight up garden variety misogyny.

Re: Funny SJW stories?

[dethtoll]

I'm kind of impressed. It takes a special sort to engage in that kind of confirmation bias.