Case (
case) wrote in
fandomsecrets2014-12-07 03:47 pm
[ SECRET POST #2896 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2896 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 052 secrets from Secret Submission Post #414.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Re: Should you ignore the bad parts of people/things?
(Anonymous) 2014-12-08 12:05 am (UTC)(link)I used to have a group of friends I hung out with in school. Most of them were guys, of the 4chan-anime-videogames variety. And most of them were pretty good guys, fun to hang out with. At least in the early days. They did introduce me to a lot of classic anime.
But over time their views became more and more aggressive, to the point where I felt uncomfortable hanging out with them. They used to make a lot of sexist jokes. (One of them in particular really turned into a classic "all women are bitches and whores why won't people date me" sort of person. He used to be chill; it was sad to see.) Most times I would find myself hanging out at whoever's house it was, sitting there bored while the guys talked videogames.
They would sometimes make fun of me for being a feminist and having a different viewpoint. I was often afraid to say anything. Instead of listening to me, they dismissed my concerns and feelings. They were 'just joking'. They were talking about /other/ girls, not me. But I'd still wonder: Do they think these things about /me/, too?
That's not what friendship looks like.
Eventually I decided we didn't have a lot in common any more, so I stopped hanging out with them.
Re: Should you ignore the bad parts of people/things?
(Anonymous) 2014-12-08 01:02 am (UTC)(link)Anon, I think you were right to leave that group, too. To me, this is why it's almost impossible to remain friends with people who think like this, it feels like they're including you in the "all women are bitches and whores" talk, or you're their magical exception ("not like other girls") which is almost as bad. It demonstrates an inability to see people for who they are rather than their gender/stereotype, and people like that don't make great friends.