[ SECRET POST #2896 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2896 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 052 secrets from Secret Submission Post #414.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[kallanda_lee]

HAHA, both to be fair, though I meant the former.

Marrying for money is something I might even consider, however killing for money is one step too far for me. If i were rich, i just wouldn't get married.

I am actually a romantic, and have known that passion - but I'm also a realist, and wen I look at couples that have lasted for 10, 20, 50 years - that passion has died out, and the ones who stick together are mostly just good friends above all else.

[(Anonymous)]

I think sometimes people confuse "passion" and "love." They can happen together and in the early parts of a relationship, they usually do. But they're not the same thing at all.

Passion is all chemicals. It's attraction and lust. Love involves those things, but it's something that has to be worked at, and a lot of times you have to make a conscious choice to still love someone. I guarantee those couples you mentioned still love each other in a romantic sense and consider themselves more than friends, but it doesn't look that way to a lot of people because it isn't the same kind of love that's felt early on.

[kallanda_lee]

Oh, I'm not saying they see themselves as just friends. I'm saying that the friendship/companionship aspect of the relationship has become more prominent versus the passion/lust. Both were probably present at the beginning, though, just in other proportions.

[kaffy_r]

As someone who's about to celebrate her 33rd anniversary (going on 34th if we take the time living together into consideration), I can tell you that being best friends with the person you love is, as far as I can see, a prerequisite to a long relationship. One can fall in love, hard and strong - which I did - and still not make it in a relationship. You truly do need more than love, or more than romantic love. Luckily, I also fell hard in like. And I can tell you that, with the two things still going strong, the passion is still there. And the laughs, and the comfort.

[kallanda_lee]

Well, that's great to hear. I only ever been in relationship with people I considered friends first - though personally I do struggle with dwindling passion over the years. I'm just one of those people who really enjoys the "crazy in love" phase.

Also happy birthday!

[kaffy_r]

Thanks; I was mostly agreeing with you that friendship is a necessary base of long term relationships (which I got out of your original comment; if that wasn't what you were actually talking about, my apologies. And the reality of at least my long relationship is that passion does indeed wane - and then suddenly and wonderfully waxes. You just end up realizing that the passion cycles, just like most everything in life.

Thanks for the birthday wishes; my actual birthday was back in September. My Best Beloved and I met in January of 1981, moved in together in May of that year, and got married in December of that year. It has been the weirdest ride of my life, and one I am so very glad I fell into.

[kallanda_lee]

That sounds pretty wonderful, actually ;)