[ SECRET POST #2976 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2976 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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04.
[Homestuck]


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06.
[NCIS: Los Angeles/Hawaii Five-0]


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10.
[Left Shark (Katy Perry? Super Bowl?) and Bad-Dragon .com]


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14.
[hindsight]









Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 016 secrets from Secret Submission Post #425.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

10. http://i.imgur.com/XigCC8T.jpg
[Left Shark (Katy Perry? Super Bowl?) and Bad-Dragon .com]

Transcript by OP

[fscom]

Advertisement from bad-dragon .com: 'Portside [a dildo style] is back, for a limited time with new "Left Shark" color! [that is, an ocean-blue]'

Additional text: 'I am not now nor do I ever expect to be a dildo user.
But I kind of want one of these just to have in a collection.
It's both freaky-lookin' and comical.
Sadly, I can't drop $90 on a joke dildo....'

[(Anonymous)]

Speaking of unusual dildos (because who else is going to appreciate this but FS?), you can apparently get wolf-like dildos with knots. I'm so sorry I forgot what site they were on. So, ABO-ers, now you can truly experience knotting.

[(Anonymous)]

So I am most definitely not the target audience, but I'm morbidly curious- how do they work? Because afaik, knotting involves a dick that swells up after sex so two wolves or dogs are basically locked together, to inhibit another male from impregnating the bitch, and I don't see how someone could easily replicate that with a sex toy. (I'm not gonna google because I really don't want to see pictures.)

[(Anonymous)]

I believe it involves a small inflatable portion at the base of the toy, although I'm not entirely sure on that--may just be a molded wide portion; it's been a while since I was curious enough to look it up/got linked by terrible people.

[juliamon]

afaik there's only one company that makes inflatable-knot dildos (Elypse-Art), the rest are just molded.

[(Anonymous)]

I know there are several sites that sell those, including Bad Dragon.

[iceyred]

Gotta say, that doesn't look like the color of any ocean I've ever seen. Those dildo makers are almost as incompetent as Left Shark himself.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm guessing "ocean-blue" is the anon's description?

Maybe azure looks less "azure" in the shape of a Lovecraftian monster from beneath the waves.

[fingalsanteater]

If I spent $90 on that I'd use the fuck out of it. It looks rather fun, tbh.

[(Anonymous)]

What the actual fuck. Was this a commercial that aired during the supebowl or something?

[(Anonymous)]

Katy Perry's halftime show had shark backup dancers flanking her. The Left Shark pretty much gave up on the choreography and just sort of did his own thing. Looking completely ridiculous and hilarious, as she got upstaged by a guy in a goofy-looking shark costume.

And like all things in pop culture, it became a meme.

[(Anonymous)]

Thank you for the explanation. ( I was really scared to google this)

[(Anonymous)]

You could have it as art on your wall in a pretty shadowbox. You wouldn't have to tell everyone it was a dildo.

[(Anonymous)]

Wouldn't it be kinda obvious it is a dildo, lol.

[kamino_neko]

Not particularly. It's not even vaguely like any sort of real-world penis, aside from being longer than it is wide....

[kallanda_lee]

I totally own a joke dildo. It wasn't that expensive, though.

[sarillia]

What's your joke dildo?

[kallanda_lee]

It's sort of this huge, veiny, ugly attempt-at-realistic-but failing one. Mostly it's a joke because me and a bunch of friends used it in the "dildo Olympics" (not sexual, we were throwing the things) - so it's a keepsake, not for actual use.

[snowcipher]

The dildos on bad-dragon are way too expensive or I'd own several.

[(Anonymous)]

Me, too... Ironically, of course. Not for use. Really. Totally not for use. At all. Ever.

[beverlykatz]

One of my good friends has a newish tradition where they get a new BD every birthday. I want to mock them for spending so much on weird dildos, but... I'm kind of jealous. They look pretty cool.

[(Anonymous)]

I want a few of them myself, but the prices are pretty prohibitive, and I'm not sure I'd ever work up the courage to actually buy one. I like the fiction snippets for the various models/characters, though, and sometimes I do browse the Adoption catalog for defective ones...

[elaminator]

That art is cracking me up!

[(Anonymous)]

LOL this is why the rest of the world hates us. Its why they love us too, but still.