[ SECRET POST #3013 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3013 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 07 pages, 155 secrets from Secret Submission Post #431.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Have you ever noticed that for people born after 1989, thinshaming is the norm? Have you noticed that the majority of Americans are overweight? Have you noticed that between the food in the stores and the growing acceptance of being overweight, having thin or even underweight women in movies and TV shows isn't creating the problem AIRT thinks it does/will?

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

DA

And you don't think the obsession with weight and thinnness that leads to a lot of girls especially becoming overweight thanks to esteem and confidence issues isn't related to that at all?

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

I think it's the responsibility of parents/guardians to raise children, not the entertainment industry. I really can't simplify it anymore than that for you. Parents/guardians are responsible for creating a healthy foundation for their children based on their beliefs and morals. This includes body image.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Then you're a very, very naive human being with no comprehension of how the powers of influence work on a person's mind.

Do you think everyone with an eating disorder was raised by people who made them feel shit about their bodies? You don't think any of them were raised in environments where despite the best efforts of their families to make the most healthy environment possible, they have this illness anyway?

Ever heard of peer pressure? Ever heard of adolescents developing self-esteem issues because their barometer of how they think they/the world should be shifts from being influenced by their parents to being influenced by the world at large (as it should be, unfortunately in some cases it's for the worst).

Did your parents raise you to never be influenced by anything at all? You've never done a single thing because you saw someone else advocate/endorse/enthuse about it? That's influence. That happens, regardless of how you try and protect people from it.

To think that raising a child 'properly' is somehow going to make them 100% immune to being influenced by others, or to having e.g. the media amplify an illness or disorder they have anyway is incredibly naive.

Re: Actually..

[a_potato]

That's not how things work, though. In a perfect world, parents/guardians could insulate their children from all outside influence and ensure that they grow to hold certain values and attitudes. But that's simply not the world that we live in. Kids are influenced by their total environment, and that includes people other than their parents. Additionally, it's in the nature of children, as they age and develop, to pull away from and go against their parents, and to latch on to other sources of guidance/information. It's very hard to guard against that, and it's also not particularly healthy to do so.

Re: Actually..

[lb_lee]

Well, yes, parents are obligated. But some of us don't have parents, or are raised by really shitty ones. We learned how to be a decent human mostly by reading books and trying to imitate fictional characters, because we DIDN'T have that foundation at home. If we had relied solely on our family, we would've been tanked.

The entertainment industry isn't some natural ineffable force like rain or snow. It's something we humans make, quite consciously and with awareness. It's not as though 'parents' and 'people in the entertainment industry' are mutually exclusive, and it's not as though the trends in media are accidental; a lot of money and thought goes into them.

As an artist myself, I see it as vital that we critique the media we consume! It's how media grows and changes.

--Rogan

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

"the growing acceptance of being overweight"

Oh, you sweet naive child.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

I wish. I'm 39 this year and the difference in attitudes between people under 25 and those over 30 is staggering. It's kinda split with the 25-30 crowd but the under 25s really seem to think "Fat is beautiful! Shame that skinny woman!" Maybe it's just a fandom thing? That's my primary exposure to young people. I can't relate to their attitudes and think most are dangerously stupid, so I avoid them in real life.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

It's a Tumblr thing. I'm 23 (almost 24) and I've never encountered that in real life. Most of the girls on my campus are slim. Most couples I see are guys with slim women.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

I'm 36.

If you genuinely believe the Tumblr attitude is in any way the attitude of real life, then you're about the most immature 39 year old I've ever met.

Those are kids trying to feel better about themselves in a world that makes them feel like shit. It's in no way a reflection of any reality.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

If Tumblr is your primary exposure to young people, I suggest you interact on a much wider frame of reference.

Despite what it wants to think, the Tumblr hivemind is not reality, nor does it make up more than a miniscule percentage of it. If most of the kids on Tumblr tried behaving offline the way they do on that site, then the real world is going to be a massive shock to the system for them. No one gives a fuck about your triggers in daily real life. No one is going to cater to your feelings or use labels you care about.

It has nothing to do with fandom, except insofar as fandom serves the same kind of role by providing younger people with places to deal with and express their identities in a space with other likeminded people. And the very reason they have to do this, be it over fandom feelings, or gender identities, or race, or weight, or whatever else, is because the world outside the digital sphere is banging home all those norms (white, cis, straight, skinny, attractive etc.) and those people who don't fit the mold only have spaces like that to retreat to.

Do you honestly think that means the things they're dealing with are anywhere close to being accepted? If they were, then they wouldn't need such spaces, that's the whole point.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

I'm amused that people here actually think thin people are "oppressed" somehow. Acceptance of being overweight exists because of the pressure to be thin. Maaaaybe people are really fucking sick of the bullying, sexism and overall disgusting internalized hatred of fat people. How about people accept health at any size, and the rest is between them and their doctor and maybe mind their own damn business?

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

It is accepted. Try being 20 pounds overweight and go to Asia and everyone will call you fat to your face. 20 pounds overweight in America is seen as normal.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Some places hate fat people more than others and have more stringent weight standards, therefore fat people are totally accepted?

Nah.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

I was born in 1991 and I…kind of disagree.

I know I have issues with eating. I've lost over 25 pounds in the past year (went from 142 to 117.2 lbs at 5'2").

I'm healthy now…

But I also obsessively count my calories and I induce vomiting in panic whenever I stress out that I've gone over my calorie limit. I look at all the other girls on my campus obsessively and compare how thin I am to them and always find myself wanting.

I look up celebrity weights and heights to check their BMIs and compare it to my own. I'm still trying to get under 115 because it kills me that Zoe Saldana weighs that much when she's a full 5 inches taller than me.

I always felt like a piece of shit for being heavier (at my heaviest I was 157 lbs) and I'm slimmer now, but I've never felt ashamed of my lower weight. Ever. I don't even think that kind of talk applies to me because I just want to get smaller (aiming for sub-110). And when people here talk about how much they weigh and how easy it is for them or how they're naturally skinny, it kills me inside. It really does.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Get help. That is not at all healthy, physically or psychologically.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Upon re-reading, it sounds worse than it actually is. I don't have an eating disorder or a "white girl disease" or anything -- and people who self diagnose are silly anyway.

I just don't think it's true that people born after 1989 really experience any kind of horrible thin-shaming. It's basically confined to Tumblr.

[(Anonymous)]

I can relate and I'm so sorry you're going through this, anon. I'm 5'2", work out every single day, try to eat well, but I'm constantly stuck between 123-127 lbs.. At my lowest weight, I was 110 lbs., and that was when I was starving myself on just fruits and canned veggies. Even now, I want to get back into that shape. It's awful. It SUCKS, and I know I need help.

Re: Actually..

[a_potato]

Is thinshaming actually the norm? I'd say it's certainly something that's a problem (any kind of bodyshaming is, really), but I'm not sure that it's more common than fatshaming. And I think the pushback against the latter, as well as the apparent growing acceptance of being overweight, has more to do with a greater number of people being overweight and less to do with the ability of people to resist certain messages. The rise in obesity rates doesn't necessarily track to people no longer valuing a certain body type.

All of that said, around half (and I recall coming across a study that found the number to be upwards of 60%. Most of what I've seen tends toward the lower figure, though, so I'm going with that) of elementary-aged girls report concerns over their weight and body type (namely, that they're "too fat"), and compare themselves unfavorably to the women they see in magazines and on TV/in movies. The cycle of dieting starts with girls as young as age 9. Also, since the late aughts, the prevalence of eating disorders in teenage girls has increased. Despite what may be some trends in the right direction, girls are receiving a certain set of messages about how they should look, and many of them are taking it to heart.

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

Eating disorders aren't a problem?

...and you REALLY think "thinshaming" is a bigger problem than fatshaming?

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

(eos are a mental illness - we don't catch it from hollywood)

Re: Actually..

[(Anonymous)]

DA

No we don't, but constant, endless reinforcement of the thing that makes your disorder a hundred times worse (and even worse than that, VALIDATES it and makes you think the thing you're doing to yourself that you know is bad is actually the thing you SHOULD be doing because it's what the world expects) is hardly helping, is it?

Re: Actually..

[a_potato]

Mental illness can be and often is triggered by external factors.

Re: Actually..

[iambecomebees]

Do you know anorexia nervosa is a culturally bound mental disorder? It's being diagnosed more frequently in other countries now, but for some time, most of the cases of it were in the USA. Which is where Hollywood is.

Re: Actually..

[iambecomebees]

You need to read some real studies and cite some sources because this is all bullshit. The only place that thin-shaming is the norm is within weight-acceptance movements. This is my personal experience, but between fatshaming and thinshaming, I have never heard ANY of the latter in my interactions at work, which is mostly with people who are not part of internet-based fandom, who are probably more representative of the general populace than fandom might be. I do hear a lot of fatshaming, whether deliberate or less malicious. There are studies on how people privately rate overweight people as being stupider, less skilled, etc. than people who are not overweight, even if they would never say so aloud. Thinshaming is not the norm now, and it won't be for a long time.