[ SECRET POST #3068 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3068 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.
[William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy]


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02.
[Wild Kratts]


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03.
[Harry Potter/Fleur Delacour]


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04.
[Jennifer Barkley from Parks&Recreation]


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05.


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06.


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07.
[Handa-kun]


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08. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]



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09. [WARNING for child molestation]



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10. [WARNING for mental illness/suicide]

[It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini]


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11. [WARNING for rape]













Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #438.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Advice?

[(Anonymous)]

...Maybe this is weird, but maybe you could ask to go to a therapy session with her? Her therapist could act as a buffer, and try to help her (both of you, really) with the immediate aftermath of bringing these issues up.

Re: Advice?

[bigpaw]

Yeah honestly, joint therapy sounds like it could help a lot in this sort of situation. It's difficult because you definitely have to take care of yourself first, but if this is a friend then of course you care about how she feels too. If it's affecting your academics and mental health, then you definitely need your own space. If she's been diagnosed then you can probably talk with her about it more frankly, point out the patterns that are a part of the disorder, show examples of people who care about her (including yourself) and how they haven't left her, idk! This is tough, I'm sorry.

HOLD ON

[insanenoodlyguy]

Diet, Bigpaw, I'm sorry I'm late first off (was asleep all last night), and I'm sorry to be so blunt, but this is a potentially horrible idea. Let me be clear I'm not trolling, note I'm not calling you two any names or dismissing your feelings here, I want to be 100% that I'm opposed to this and I want people to listen why.

This person is DROWNING already. The responsiblity here is already too much for them. They can't take the amount of need this person has for them, they are already giving too much.

And you are suggesting they take formal responsiblity for their friends care. Because that's what this will become. Now they have to go to this therapy. They will become their friends keeper officially. It shouldn't be that way, but it's probably how they will see it. It's DEFINITELY how their friend will see it. Now every time friend has a problem, it will be even more important to that friend that THEY are the one to talk to. They are the official therapy buddy after all. because remember, the friend isn't going to soak this all in after one therapy session. oh, hopefully they are a good enough person to listen, but it could easily backfire when the next time friend is in a bad place, now this one person is all they could think about. What's worse, if the friendship does fall apart now, there will be more resentment and hurt feelings and BLAME.

You are certainly right about the needing space, but the friend needs to do that by making space, not strengthening ties.

Edit: I will note I know something about DBT (as talked about below) and it is the right kind of therapy for the friend most likely, but I don't specifically know what kind of therapist friend is seeing and some other forms of therapy could end with the more cynical outlook I provided above. Also I think friend just might need a break first.

Re: Advice?

[diet_poison]

This might not be a bad idea, OP.