fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3150 ]

[ SECRET POST #3150 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3150 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
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I was venting with my friends about my frustrating conversations with my moom and I got the stupid as fuck idea to confront her about it. It turned out a disaster because naturally I ended up being accusatory and making myself sound crazy.

And now my mom is convinced even more that the computer/internet is the source of all my emotional issues and for my health I should stop using it for a long while.(There was a period when I had an 'intervention' forced on me and the entire computer was confiscated. During that time, my behavior was blamed on me watching Criminal Minds)

I need more self control.

I mean, if you're addicted to the internet, it's a symptom, not a cause. But continuing that addiction is only hurting you.

Did you miss the part where I said that my parents have always found something to blame my behavior on?

I was not allowed to do alot of things because of my "issues", which my parents refused to acknowledge was largely because of severe bullying. I want to be able to do these things like drive, but I have to rely on other people to go anywhere, to work, if I want to go out, anything.

The internet is frankly the only place where I have some feeling of freedom and able to do things myself and feel independent.

So are you going do anything about, try to improve yourself, and get out of this situation or blame it on your parents and stay on the internet all day?

I'm going to try and save my money,at my job if my parents don't refuse to drive me one day because they don't approve of my wardrobe.

But fucking hell if I'm going to give up the internet altogether.

Holy cow, you sound like you've always got a way to blame others for your problems.

NAYRT

Seriously, shut the fuck up with this hostile bullshit

DA

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-19 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-19 23:49 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-19 23:52 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-19 23:54 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 00:00 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 00:41 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 01:02 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 01:24 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

dethtoll - 2015-08-20 00:59 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 01:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

dethtoll - 2015-08-20 01:54 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 02:15 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 02:19 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

dethtoll - 2015-08-20 02:25 (UTC) - Expand

Re: How did you fuck up today?

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-20 16:17 (UTC) - Expand

Please don't do this bullshit

Not a useful way to approach this shit

thanks

Exactly

Frankly, it sounds like your mother is the problem here.

Yeah, but right now it's a problem I can't escape. My psychologist is always willing to give her a pass and tell me that I can't change people so just deal with it (and that my father threatening to not take me to work for a ridiculous reason is his way of showing he 'cares'.

Sounds like you need a new psychologist.

Yeah. I'd like to get one. But I have a few more sessions with this one before I can move on.

Your psychologist is right that you can't change people, but if they're not teaching you how to cope and move forward, the're doing a piss poor job. They shouldn't have to need you to tell them what you need, but aparently you'll have to if you want to get anything useful out of them.

Sounds like it's time to move the fuck out of there. If you're employed, find a way to take the bus. Find a room mate. Do something.

You don't have to be stuck in an abusive situation.

Yeah I'm working on a plan for that.

I'm hoping at some point I can move in with my BF if I can get up the money.

I hope you do it sooner rather than later because your situation sounds completely fucked.

I'm sorry, anon. Save up that money, work hard and move the hell away. :(

Thanks.

and I will.

I got the stupid as fuck idea to confront her about it. It turned out a disaster because naturally I ended up being accusatory and making myself sound crazy.

Wooowww, that could be me talking about interacting with my partner who I think is being abusive to me. How did I fuck up today? I let my feelings show. I am obviously paranoid, bitter and crazy.

So much sympathy, anon. I don't think you need to change, you need to survive and get out of there. Stay strong. Work on feeling okay about yourself like I am. You're a work in progress but you are not the issue. If you can't take the shit any more, vent at them, but I doubt you'll make much headway about them at the moment, try to vent to others instead, and yeah, survive and work on eventually leaving.

Thanks

I hope you to a better place.

Hey Nonny, I know that reddit has a reputation, but you may find this subreddit helpful?

https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/

Good luck, and best of wishes with your job!

Thanks. That would be a better place to vent, I think.

Try to get out of there as fast as you can. Especially if you are who I think you are.

Remember that you are an adult. Your parents may allow you to still live in their house, but they have no right to control how you are dressed or not allowing you to take driving lesson (though I recognise the issue here is that they won't drive you, which is a fucked up way to control you.) This is even more douchey of them if you pay rent. Do you have any local friends that can drive you around for a bit?

If I were you I would try to get as many shifts at work as possible, cut down on indulgences for awhile while you save up (like little to no Starbucks or sweets) and if your parents are trying to control your finances maybe open a new savings account that they don't know about. If you live in an area with limited public transport (and it seems that way) getting a driver's licence would be a priority too.

Thanks.

I suppose I have my coworkers, though I'd feel kinda bad relying on them too much. I do pay rent, and while it sucks I keep paying it to establish some sense that I'm dependable. I will be on the look out for lists of extra shifts.

I don't have a bank account and for the most part aside from expecting pay for new glasses after I accidentally broke the last pair (which is fair) They leave me alone about money once rent is paid.

I'll work on the driving thing more.

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