fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3156 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3156 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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03.

[Spider Riders]

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04.

[Shameless]

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05.

[The Mighty Boosh]

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06.

[Glitch]

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07.

[Fire Emblem: Awakening]

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08.

[Kaikisen]

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09.

[Kingdom Hearts 2]

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10.

[Yu-Gi-Oh]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 029 secrets from Secret Submission Post #451.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You have a point, but it's much wider than just Cullen vs Rochester. Women have been taught for ages that abusive brooding men are sexy.

Also women often find abusive brooding men sexy

Lol like that's different.

how is it not different

So you're saying it's innate or something?

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-25 23:09 (UTC) - Expand

sarillia - 2015-08-25 23:14 (UTC) - Expand

meishuu - 2015-08-26 14:03 (UTC) - Expand

You sound like a guy who said hello to a woman once and didn't get a blowjob in return, so now you're forever bitter...

I don't know where you thought I said there was something wrong with that?

But I don't

wait I kind of just brainfarted past the 'abusive' part

MY BAD EVERYBODY

Re: SA

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-25 23:04 (UTC) - Expand

There are a lot of guys out there who think that if they show the bare minimum of decent behavior to a woman and she doesn't fall in love instantly, she must like "assholes" and "jerks" or even want to be abused.

I think that's what that poster was referring to.

DA No, they sound like they equate "taught" with superficial brainwashing attempts and are trying to insist it's natural/genuine or something.

Closer to that. I'm generally uncomfortable with arguments that assign a preference or view or whatever entirely to social conditioning, because I think it's kind of insulting

buttttttt also I kind of just mentally skipped over the "abusive" qualifier and was focusing more on the "brooding and sexy" part, and I probably wouldn't have made the post that way if I hadn't done that

nayrt

Er, as a woman, sorry but it's kind of an inescapable fact that women find those kind of men sexy. It's not a "lol women are idiots," or "women will always inherently prefer abusive men and that's good," it's just a descriptive fact of how things of how things happen to be at this moment in time. And saying lots of women don't happen to find abusive broody men sexy is like saying lots of men don't find big breasts sexy.

That doesn't negate the idea that they find this sexy because they've been socialized to do so, btw.

Some women, but not all. I'm a woman and I've never found it sexy. Even a little bit of jerk behavior is a huge turnoff and pisses me off.

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 03:57 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 08:21 (UTC) - Expand

meishuu - 2015-08-26 14:05 (UTC) - Expand

arcadiaego - 2015-08-26 21:23 (UTC) - Expand

As the commenter who said at the top "women have been taught to", yeah, this. Not that it always sticks, and not that it always manifests irl.

Really, looking through this very community reveals TONS of support for this fact. Snape, Hannibal, every anime villain...

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 01:20 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 03:16 (UTC) - Expand

diet_poison - 2015-08-26 04:47 (UTC) - Expand

ketita - 2015-08-26 05:53 (UTC) - Expand

arcadiaego - 2015-08-26 21:24 (UTC) - Expand

I'm not a guy and I second OP statement, so fuck you.

It's almost as if you comment is somehow related to the first comment... SOMEHOW.

Again, as I've said elsewhere in the thread, I completely brain farted on this one and said some stupid shit because I legitimately just didn't notice the part where it said "abusive" even though I physically retyped it

I'm an idiot, basically

Right. Because clearly they would never find them sexy of their own accord. Poor, idiot women, being socialized into having those problematic fantasies.

Lol, okay, so you believe in gender essentialism. Women are naturally attracted to abusers.

No, I believe individual women have an array of different fantasies and different preferences in imaginary men. And I believe that blaming those preferences on social conditioning is condescending as fuck.

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 19:38 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 20:22 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 21:45 (UTC) - Expand

meishuu - 2015-08-26 22:14 (UTC) - Expand

jfc, what's wrong with the above commenter? (the one you replied to)

Edited 2015-08-26 14:12 (UTC)

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 14:19 (UTC) - Expand

meishuu - 2015-08-26 14:26 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2015-08-26 21:42 (UTC) - Expand

meishuu - 2015-08-26 22:10 (UTC) - Expand

God I hate when people make this argument.

Like, I'm sorry you can't accept that you're influenced by your environment. I'm sorry it makes you upset. But it's reality. Everybody has been socialized for certain things. Everybody. Not just women, but men, too. That's why you get trends in attitudes and behaviors that somehow magically change when you go and look at a different culture.

It doesn't take away agency to acknowledge that. What takes away agency is denying we're influenced by anything ever, because you can't make informed choices or evaluate your reactions to things if you refuse to take half the information about yourself into account.

Agree so much with this. As a I grew older I realised how insidious this actually was because it's everywhere. It's scary how people are quick to diminish abuse.

To be honest, I used to find those kinds of guys attractive a couple years ago. Now whenever I re-watch the stuff I used to find romantic, the guys come off as stalkers and the female character is useless without him. It's super cringeworthy.

It was just a phase for me, hopefully other girls eventually realize how gross that kind of behavior is...