fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3179 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3179 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Rupaul's Drag Race season 7]

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[Supernatural]

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[20th Century Boys]

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[The Mighty Boosh, Noel Fielding]

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I am going to eat at some fancy restaurants. As someone who has never had any kind of...etiquette/manners lessons, how important are they? Not stuff like don't chew with your mouth open and such. I got that. But stuff like forks/spoons, napkin use, etc.

Not very important at all, unless you're going to some incredibly, ridiculously fancy restaurants. All that old dinner party shit is extremely out of date at most restaurant. As long as you just try to be neat and do your best, you'll probably be fine.

What kind of "fancy" are we talking? Old-fashioned fancy? If there's an armoury of cutlery waiting for you, start from the outside, and work your way in as the courses progress.

Or will these places be the "enjoy this single chive sprig that I've lightly dusted with two grains of flame-roasted and then dried chili pepper, dredged and flash-fried in liquid nitrogen" fancy? Because the only etiquette advice I can give for that is, eat a proper meal before you go, and do try not to laugh at the absurdity of it all. If it is the latter type of place, the waiters will probably have to tell you how to eat the food, anyway, as there's usually some "notion" behind it.

The mid-way point between these two extremes is usually A) eat before you go because you still won't get enough food and B) the food will be fancy/decoratively arranged, but you should have normal cutlery, and be able to eat in a reasonable manner.

(A) has almost never been my experience, and I am a reasonably hungry fat dude who has eaten at a fair number of fancy and high-end restaurants

+1

OP, if you're still reading, my experience with fancy-ish restaurants (pretty much all in the Gordon Ramsay group, FWIW) has been that the portions are small because the food is rich. I'm not a huge eater, but I didn't eat for hours before going, and it was a struggle to finish all the courses.

You probably know most of this already, but...

Don't dive in before your host starts eating; don't blow your nose or fart at the table (and if you do end up farting, don't lift your butt to let the wind escape). Don't hold your utensils in your fists like they're weapons. Don't cut up all your meat before you start eating; cut one or two pieces at a time, as you go. Wipe your mouth before you take a drink so you don't leave a mess of grease on the lip of your glass. Don't put your utensils down on the table after you've used them, and don't rest them with one end on the table and the other on the plate, like oars.

Try not to worry too much; you'll probably be fine. Enjoy the fancy cuisine, and I hope the company is good. Don't forget to save room for dessert. Some of these fancy places have amazing desserts.

not ayrt

Don't put your utensils down on the table after you've used them, and don't rest them with one end on the table and the other on the plate, like oars.

I'm curious too, what is the proper thing to do with utensils once you've used them?

I think you're supposed to rest them on the edge of your plate--like, both the blade and the handle are resting on the plate rim.

there's an example here (you have to scroll down a bit)

http://onpace.osu.edu/modules/polishing-your-job-etiquette-skills/brush-up-on-your-dining-etiquette/table-manners-during-the-meal-part-2

thank you!

Also don't smash your mug on the floor and shout ANOTHER

Similarly, don't throw your wineglass into the fireplace.

or say loudly "excuse me but could you tell me again what percent of this crème fraîche is actual horse semen?"

I'm afraid to ask what's the history behind this.

you're telling me!

A lot of fancy people have worse table manners than you would believe, so don't stress.

If someone brings you something you're not sure how to eat, you can say it's your first time trying it and you're not sure how it's supposed to be eaten. If the staff are friendly and have enough experience, they won't make you feel silly for asking questions.

If it's a set course meal and the table is laid out already (you have lots of forks) you generally start with the smaller ones on the outside for entrees and the big one near the middle is for the main course.
Set your knife and fork at 6 (the bottom of your plate) when you'd like it cleared, or keep it out to the sides if you're not finished yet.

Don't disturb the other tables or be rude to the staff, and you're good, IMO.

What's that old line?

"A gentleman is one who is rude only on purpose"?

Haha. I like it.

[ SECRET POST #3179 ]

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ayrt

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