fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3223 ]

[ SECRET POST #3223 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3223 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 050 secrets from Secret Submission Post #461.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Not pedophilia (I don't want to hear the appeal of that, thanks) but like an 18-year-old dating a 40-year-old. It's a kink. What do people like about it?

Power domination for the younger readers, and wishful thinking for older fans.

Personally it's a combination of factors.

I enjoy the dynamic of the older partner's greater life experiences being beneficial and comforting to the younger partner. A safety net, I guess. Also how the older partner has to be more considerate and work to keep things equal and healthy for both people.

Age difference alone isn't the kink for most, ime. The kink is more 'unequal relationships' where two people have to struggle to build something mutually healthy. The age difference is one more obstacle to that (much like pre-existing prejudices or biological obstacles or whatever) and the kink is watching two people work past it.

This is how I feel, too! I don't go looking for age differences in my ships, I often just end up with them because I like a dynamic that comes out of the characters having so much to work through, and that's just part of it!

ANON!

I was literally think about this before! Mostly because I find myself reading early to mid twenties young women with older men.

What do I like about it? I don't know. I suppose part of it is very superficial. On my part, as an early twenties young lady, if I find an older man [character] attractive, then I want to see fic about it. Especially with a younger character. So part of that is self insert/projecting? Because I was thinking about it myself, and I wondered if I'd ever really give that a go---would I feel like we're in different stages of life? Too far apart to make it work? If the family is a big influence, would that be weird too (my general rule is as long as you're not as old as my mother)?

Part of it might be the desire to be with someone that has experience...or perhaps it's the idea (and the vanity) that a person who is in fact attractive, or has so much experience would find something special or worth while or attractive in someone so young...So vanity?

I don't know. I don't always dig it. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I think it's kind of hot and sometimes I think it's a bit taboo, so it's crossing the border/riding the line of what's acceptable, and sometimes that excites me/other people.

As a person who used to read such fics (18 or 19 w/40), I do realize some of it is reaching. Really reaching, but it's fiction! So...I don't know. I try to write the characters a bit older though...while I'm sure that there can be many people who are 18 and very mature for their age (be it character or life experience), I know I wasn't and I knew plenty of people who have matured as time has gone on, and I think, depending on the relationship one is trying to write, a bit of maturity goes a long way (at least in making it more believable--as there are people IRL who do have large age gaps).

tl;dr: sometimes it gives a naughty feeling, and that's exciting, sometimes I genuinely find people attractive and I would like to see where that goes (even if it makes me feel scared/slightly uncomfortable). Never done it myself though...(not that the thought hasn't crossed my mind, consequences always deter me)

I think this is partially for me too, even though I have a hard time putting into words what I like about it.

At least some of it is that I genuinely find a lot of older people attractive. Most of the recent celebs I've been into have been people that have 10, sometimes 20 years on me. The experience has something to do with it too... I find it appealing, but I guess there's also a level of comfort to it? “They have all this experience, they can give me some pointers, we can take care of each other."

And even know I like a lot of things in fiction that are more taboo than an age difference, I guess it does add a bit of excitement to the pairings. And something else to “overcome", like other anon said.

Idk, I generally like to focus on the porn and not think about the reasons, but I'm sure there are reasons.

AYRT

I know where you're coming from in regards to finding people/celebrities who are older genuinely attractive. I've been like that for a the greater part of my life.

It is rather difficult to put in words, isn't it?

And yes, I too do like to focus on the other aspects, like a smutty oneshot or drawn out lovin', then I really don't care if age is addressed unless the characters use their age differences to turn each other on, i.e. "you dirty old man". But sometimes, if the point of the story is the relationship, but it's is not addressed (or it's dealt with a grain of salt), it does bother me. Let me see how it works! Make it work! Make me believe it!

I've been like that for a the greater part of my life. I think I've always felt it too to some extent, but the older I get the more attractive I find older people, lol. I suppose that's only natural.

Thankfully I feel that most the age difference fic I've read did discuss the issues such a relationship would entail, or at least discuss (sometimes at length) the characters feelings and insecurities in the matter. Which is yet another thing I like about it, I guess; characters feeling self-conscious about an aspect of themselves (age in this case) and being reassured that they're 'fine, as is'.

At least some of it is that I genuinely find a lot of older people attractive. Most of the recent celebs I've been into have been people that have 10, sometimes 20 years on me. The experience has something to do with it too... I find it appealing, but I guess there's also a level of comfort to it? “They have all this experience, they can give me some pointers, we can take care of each other."

Ditto on all of this :).

I think it's also the maturity thing sometimes, too-like, if you're 18, 19 years old, and you look around at the guys your age who are still acting immature, suddenly a man who's 30 plus years old, who's got his shit together and is more stable and settled and mature is going to look a LOT more appealing to you.

Obviously there are many exceptions and variations to that, of course-there are some 18, 19 year old boys who are WAY more mature than men who are 35, 40 years old. But if one is surrounded by immature young men, I definitely think finding older men who are more mature has a serious appeal.

As for why older people go for younger people? A chance to recapture their youth, I figure. Or if they've always felt "young at heart", they may have an easier time relating to younger (yet still legal age, this must be noted, obviously) people. They may feel people in their age group are too stuffy and focused on their twilight years and resigned to getting old, and they just can't relate to that or are scared to acknowledge it or whatever.

But if one is surrounded by immature young men, I definitely think finding older men who are more mature has a serious appeal.

Now that you mention it I have seen it described in that way and I think it makes sense. (I don't think you need to be surrounded by people you view as immature, though that would certainly 'help' in this case. And say you find said older person attractive and are looking for a 'mature relationship', I suppose one might jump to the conclusion that someone with more experience might be more willing (or able?) to give you that.

God, IDK, this is why I don't examine my kinks.

They may feel people in their age group are too stuffy and focused on their twilight years and resigned to getting old, and they just can't relate to that or are scared to acknowledge it or whatever.

That I can see!

LOL, I hear you on not wanting to examine one's kinks! I do tend to crush on older men in general, always have, and I think the reasons I shared in my post about maturity and whatnot are part of why. That's one of the more "innocent", so to speak, reasons I can think of that I think most people who are attracted to older people could feel comfortable with. I know there's other theories about why young people go for older people that have rather uncomfortable implications that I wouldn't blame anyone for being wary to delve too deeply into exploring :p.

You're also right that one doesn't need to be surrounded by immature people to have that attraction, too. Sometimes some people just naturally feel "older than their years" in general, and that alone is enough reason for them to be attracted to older men or women.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #3223 ]

What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?

Re: What is the appeal of the age difference kink?