fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3375 ]

[ SECRET POST #3375 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3375 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[Anna Russell]

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02.

[Versailles TV Series]

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03.

[Jurassic Park, Robert Muldoon]

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04.

[Iggy Pop]

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05.

(Person of Interest)

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06.

[Knight Rider, Michael/KITT]

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07.

[The Division]

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08.

[Song referenced in secret: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlCZ-DakfyE (Kaleo- "Way Down We Go")]

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09.

[One Punch Man, Saitama, Genos]

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10.

[Haikyuu]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 019 secrets from Secret Submission Post #482.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

yay or nay?

super condescending

Neither true, nor useful, nor kind

OK, so I think YES, but I think the effort is being confident and positive/happy/engaged. I think that makes a person attractive in various ways whatever their body type. I don't think dressing right / spending more money / waxing enough is what makes a person beautiful. I think being really engaged and kind and caring and confident make a person really attractive.

Like there's this show I watch with, I think, a pretty ugly host, but he's just SO INTO the subject matter, and comes across as such a good / kind / caring / conscientious person, that after like one episode, his ugly ol' mug is the cutest. I'm not even kidding.

Stephen Fry?...

No, but that's actually another pretty good example!

Honestly, I would say yes for most people. It amazing how things such as makeup can turn a fairly plain face into a stunning one.

Agreed. I have seen very, very few people who I would consider to be truly ugly. Most people are average to attractive.

99.9% of the time, definitely

yes, externally and internally

Yay.

You can't just wake up, throw on a pair of ratty sweats and expect to look like a super model. You need to put a LITTLE effort into your appearance, even if it's just a pair of pants that fit you properly, or a little bit of make up. Plus, if you feel better about your appearance, you'll hold yourself differently. Which can also add to your attractiveness.

Depends on how you define beautiful. A lot of people are never gonna look "beautiful" in terms of how their facial features and body parts are arranged and proportioned, no matter how much "effort" they put into it (in fact putting a lot of obvious effort will usually make their lack of beauty stick out all the more, and make them look really fake and weird).

But attractive/cute/appealing or even entrancing and striking in other ways that make people who interact with them like to look at them? Definitely. You just gotta stop trying to look like a crummy imitation of some beautiful person who looks nothing like you, and instead look at which of your features are the best-looking, and devise some ways to make those stand out.

And it may sound trite but it's really, really not: your demeanor makes a HUGE difference. Even the most attractive person ever (in terms of their physical features) will never seem beautiful or nice to look at if they just stare around dully with a dumb look on their face, and the opposite is true too. Look at Kristen Stewart in Twilight - I'd say that in a other movies she's really pretty, but in Twilight? She doesn't look pretty or pleasant to look at in any way, and it's not because of her hair or makeup or clothes, it's about her demeanor.

Nope. It's not only condescending, but also a little blamey because it points the finger at people who dare to NOT put in the effort, because if they're so lazy then it's their own fault they're fugly, right?

Blamey? No, that's you projecting. Take ownership of your self-esteem. If not putting in effort is an act of daring to you, then wear it as a badge, and don't give a fuck if anyone blames you for it.

I don't really see it as blaming, at least not from my perspective. There's nothing that says we have to do it. I can look pretty good if I put the effort into it, and I put a lot more effort into it when I was younger. Now, most of the time, I can't be arsed to make the effort. And when I don't care enough to make the effort, it means that I really don't care - I'm good with the way I am right now in my non-beautiful natural state of me.

This applies to many things, not just beauty. Effort is generally underrated. Everyone wants a magic bullet or an excuse.

However, effort will not necessarily change others' perceptions or personal tastes. Even Miss Universe is ugly to someone.

Anyone can find a person who thinks they're beautiful. The issue is that beauty is entirely subjective and we live in a society that only pushes the kind that's barely achievable by anybody (so it can sell you shit)

You can't guarantee liking what you see in the mirror, but odds are you can find somebody who disagrees with your criticisms.

Edited 2016-04-01 05:07 (UTC)

That's only an "issue" if you buy into it. Imagine if women took all the time and energy they spend complaining about beauty standards and applied it to their own self-esteem.

You... do realize sometimes people treat you shittily despite you not caring, right?

I mean it's been demonstrated that women not buying into this stuff get passed over for jobs and things like that.

You can't just say "oh well I don't give a fuck!" without consequences. The consequences might be worth it but they're still there.

Boo hoo.

Re: It's bullshit, but:

chardmonster - 2016-04-01 16:04 (UTC) - Expand

Just curious: when you say "it has been demonstrated" by what measure do you mean? The only studies I could find on the subject either found that both attractive men and women were perceived as more desirable hires (which, while it sucks, is not a double standard) and one that found that conventionally attractive women were actually less likely to land interviews if they attached a photo to their resume.

I know that in my personal life I've been told ad nauseum that if I didn't "play the game" and slather on makeup and heels and whatnot I'd never be hired, wouldn't get promoted, etc., so I tried that to start. But at some point I just ran out of fucks. Wore pants, no makeup, boots, even to interviews. I actually got hired/promoted more! Mind you this is anecdotal, and I've mostly worked in STEM/academic/now the military, i.e. places where women who put a lot of emphasis on their looks might be seen as flightier or dumber or whatever, but I've done it in business and hospitality jobs before and seriously no one has given a single fuck.

In fact, the only people who even noticed were other women.

Re: It's bullshit, but:

(Anonymous) - 2016-04-02 04:52 (UTC) - Expand

Re: It's bullshit, but:

ariakas - 2016-04-02 16:15 (UTC) - Expand

Re: It's bullshit, but:

chardmonster - 2016-04-02 19:33 (UTC) - Expand

Re: It's bullshit, but:

chardmonster - 2016-04-02 19:32 (UTC) - Expand

Re: It's bullshit, but:

ariakas - 2016-04-03 03:29 (UTC) - Expand

That's true, because there are so many things that can help people look good. Anything from clothes, makeup, hair stuff to more drastic things like braces/veneers, plastic surgery, skin tanning/bleaching.

However, I think society in general is extremely shallow, so it's actually really sad that people spend so much money and go to such great lengths for beauty.

Sure. It doesn't necessarily take effort either. There's a lot of things that can make someone beautiful, not just shape and color and other physical factors.

Nay.

Nay.

Appearances are unimportant no matter what society tells you. Let's face it, it's basically how your parents genes are mushed in your face.
How you think and what you do are the only things that matter, and those are the only things you should put any effort into.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #3375 ]

"anyone can be beautiful if they just put in the effort"

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It's bullshit, but:

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