fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #452 ]

⌈ Secret Post #452 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

11.

__________________________________________________

12.

__________________________________________________

13.

__________________________________________________

14.

__________________________________________________

15.

__________________________________________________

16.

__________________________________________________

17.

__________________________________________________

18.

__________________________________________________

19.

__________________________________________________

20.

__________________________________________________

21.

__________________________________________________

22.

__________________________________________________

23.

__________________________________________________

24.

__________________________________________________

25.

__________________________________________________

26.

__________________________________________________

27.

__________________________________________________

28.

__________________________________________________

29.

__________________________________________________

30.

__________________________________________________

31.

__________________________________________________

32.

__________________________________________________

33.

__________________________________________________

34.

__________________________________________________

35.

__________________________________________________

36.

__________________________________________________

37.

__________________________________________________

38.

__________________________________________________

39.

__________________________________________________

40.

__________________________________________________

41.

__________________________________________________

42.

__________________________________________________

43.

__________________________________________________

44.

__________________________________________________

45.

__________________________________________________

46.

__________________________________________________

47.

__________________________________________________

48.

__________________________________________________

49.

__________________________________________________

50.

__________________________________________________

51.

__________________________________________________

52.

__________________________________________________

53.

__________________________________________________

54.

__________________________________________________

55.

__________________________________________________

56.

__________________________________________________

57.

__________________________________________________

58.

__________________________________________________

59.

__________________________________________________

60.

__________________________________________________

61.

__________________________________________________

62.

__________________________________________________

63.

__________________________________________________

64.

__________________________________________________

65.

__________________________________________________

66.

__________________________________________________

67.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 10 pages, 238 secrets from Secret Submission Post #065.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 - too big ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I have that same problem. So much so that I moved away from my parents, 2000 miles and into a friends' place. That forced me to (eventually) get a job, and now I'm (mostly) paying for my own stuff, but-

I still spend almost every free hour I have in my room. I don't want to go outside or meet people or do anything but sit here. And the worse thing? Now I feel I've earned it. Eventually I won't know anyone personally, just random acquaintences online. :/ At least I still have my roommates kicking me out occasionally, I guess.

I still spend almost every free hour I have in my room. I don't want to go outside or meet people or do anything but sit here.

I can relate. I do get out, but not often, and when I meet people I get so scared of what they think of me. Online, it's like people will talk to me, and not judge me because I'm a big geek in some fandom, or even over more important issues, because if they don't like that they can go find someone else to talk to among all the other millions of people online. In the regular world I feel like I have be what the person wants me to be and it's not worth it.

Which is probably a really immature attitude. But even before the internet as we know it I wasn't exactly a social butterfly and kept to myself a lot, so I can't blame fandom or the internet.

I don't even have roommates though.

Yeah, the roommates thing helps. They force me outside occasionally. Still, though, I've noticed myself pulling away when I can, just because I'd rather be in a quiet room, or some such- you know? I always think up an excuse.

Online, I've become more of a lurker, because I got tired of the clique-ish BS that goes on in RP and fandom groups. So....even though it's a lot easier to talk to someone online (hi, there, btw >_> ), I'm STILL withdrawing. I wonder if someday I'll just be a true hermit.

But yeah, I totally get that it's easier to be 'social' online. Here, we're not judged by appearance or awkwardness, but by knowledge, wit, and humor. I like the gauge better, personally. I don't think it's immature to not want to...sort of become someone else for another person's approval. I do feel it's a sign you're nt confident about yourself in certain areas, but-- uh, stones and glass houses and all that. >_>;

The really sad thing, for me? I just bought an iPhone, but I pretty much never have anyone to call. :P

It's such a great icon though.

I'm afraid of RP and large fandom groups for the same reason, but I do have a pretty big f-list (for which I'm very grateful) and people I really like online, though I only IM a few of them because I hate to IM people first. But I'm afraid to go into large forums in some of my fandoms because I'm way not hard-core enough about the canon.

I actually tried the online dating/friendship OKCupid type thing, but I was all weird about it. I actually was afraid to talk to a guy who contacted me because I thought he was too good-looking and probably had misjudged the (admittedly very small) picture I had up.

The other problem is that I work the graveyard shift, four nights on and four off, and spend most of the four days on sleeping. So anything that occurs regularly on a day of the week, which is most things on earth, is something I might have to skip half the time. I do get out to work but I work alone most of the night. But that's probably mostly an excuse, since I do miss sleep to be on the net.

Oh, man, I hate IMing people- not because I hate talking to them, but I worry I'm bugging them. I only do it if I absolutely have to, which I hear makes people wonder sometimes if I don't like them, but...er. I just freeze up.

I tried online friendships, too- it worked out well twice and terribly twice, so- I guess I'm still half and half on it. The only reason I ever met any of these people is because of the roommate pushing them to come by. I dunno, I think it has the potential to go so badly- if the person's close then they're hard to dodge if you don't like them, and if they're far and they do turn out to be awesome, you'll never see them. But then, I'm being pessimistic, eh? >_>

Oh geez, yeah, your schedule definitely does not help. I think if I worked the graveyard shift anything, I'd enjoy it a lot better (I do seem to be nocturnal, or near it), but I'd never do ANYTHING then.

I don't know...from the sound of it, we're both sort of on the verge, but you DO have people you interact with online, and people you actually like online, which is a harder thing to find. That's more'n I do, of my own volition (I keep telling myself this sort of attitude will help when I really hunker down to write my book, but...uh, yeah, I'm gonna believe that when it happens). I have a couple people IRL to keep me 'grounded', so that works out, too. I personally don't think everyone is helped by going and 'being social'- some of us are severely introverted- and...well, we're still working members of society, still (mostly) taking care of ourselves, so I don't think there's any major shame in that. Sure, it'd be better if I wasn't so awkward meeting people, but after twenty-plus years of dealing with it, I don't think it's something I'm going to grow out of. And I hate trying to force myself to 'get friends', so.

Edited 2008-04-02 23:14 (UTC)

Yeah, I love the graveyard shift as far as staying up all night, and my job is killer easy, but the "not being available on particular days of the week" thing is doing me in. I get lots of time off but I spend it all online.

But I do have close online friends, for which I'm very grateful, but I'd like face-to-face contact with someone besides the nurses at work. Most of my online friendships have gone pretty well, though people can disappear on you, but so can people in the real world. If I had roommates I might feel less alone. (But then I'd drive them nuts because I never sleep.)

I agree that forcing yourself to be social and make friends may not be the best thing. I had a therapist who kept telling me "No, you just have to get out there, and if you don't meet anyone you just have to get out there some more," and I felt like saying "When do I get to give up?"

I actually have my dad helping me a lot as far as "taking care of myself" but I mostly function I guess. But I don't think I'm going to become social all of a sudden either.

[ SECRET POST #452 ]

3

Re: 3

I should probably have a more serious icon, but...

Re: I should probably have a more serious icon, but...

Re: I should probably have a more serious icon, but...

Re: I should probably have a more serious icon, but...