[ SECRET POST #3549 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3549 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Fire Emblem Fates]


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03.
[Stellan Skarsgård in River]


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04.


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05.
[Labyrinth]


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06.
[Mr. Clarke from Stranger Things]


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07.
[Criminal Minds]


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08.
[Star Trek]
















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 16 secrets from Secret Submission Post #507.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

People asking "what can I do to help?" in a crisis. They mean well, but... they also don't mean they'll pick up the dog's shit and drive the kids to school at six am. (Except when they do, which is great, but then offer that.)

Re: Social pet peeves

[kallanda_lee]

Honestly that's what I mean when I say "what can I do to help" in a crisis situation, though I don't think people realize that.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT - Sometimes they do! I knew who really meant that.

But it does help to instead offer specific things. "You know what, I live right around the corner, I'll take Fido for a walk after work tonight. Do you still keep an extra key hidden under the rug?" That sort of thing. It's an actual commitment, rather than a broad and vague suggestion.

Re: Social pet peeves

[morieris]

Yep.

Nice platitudes.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

Some people will mean exactly that. I have no idea if you need the dog shit cleaned up in your garden or or someone to do the school run, which is why I ask a much more general question like, "what can I do to help?" People aren't mind readers and they have their own lives so they're not likely to know your daily/weekly routine. Ask for help if it's offered and then bitch if they refuse, not because they didn't offer to do exactly the thing you needed.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT - Maybe I should have added a "when I know you won't be able or willing to do the things I need you to do." That's the problem.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

How are people supposed to know exactly what you need or want, though? In a crisis, people are often wary of presuming too much, or they simply don't know what they can do to help. Maybe not everyone is sincere in their offer, but you won't know until you take the offer at face value and ask them to perform a simple task for you.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

When people ask "what can I do to help?" just tell them what they can do to help.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

I know another person who hates this and shrugs it off as "ugh empty platitudes" but at the same time, she will whine her ass off that people won't offer her help. Well guess what? People don't offer you help anymore because you kept complaining that you hate it.

Re: Social pet peeves

[(Anonymous)]

My relatives are prime "What can I do to help?" when the extent of their help is always "thoughts and prayers!"

Grandpa dying of lung cancer? (Their father/father in law) "What can we do to help?" "How about driving over and mowing his lawn for me so I don't have to do it?" "But... but we're six hours away. You live right there. Why would we do that? I have work I can't get away from" I dunno Uncle Useless, because you offered and I answered?