fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3703 ]

[ SECRET POST #3703 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3703 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 14 secrets from Secret Submission Post #529.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Possible answer being: Oh, right. They're stupid.

Example: I was reading a buzzfeed article (don't judge!) about things hotel housekeepers will never tell you (outside of the article, apparently). And the first item was "We slip on your used condoms" because people apparently frequently just toss them wherever on the floor after sex.

The number of comments of people losing their shit because they had to read it multiple times because at first they thought they were implying "we put on your used condoms" was mind-boggling. Where have critical thinking skills gone???

To be fair, that's an idiom that an editor should have caught.

Hi, I'm an editor for a living. "To slip" is an entirely appropriate verb, and honestly I can't think of another that would better describe the event in question, nor immediately a recasting of the sentence that wouldn't be an exercise in mental gymnastics.

Like this: "You leave your used condoms on the floor, so we end up slipping on them."

Clunky. And using a compound sentence when a simple should suffice is counterintuitive.

Trip.

Trip does not mean the same thing as slip.

Tripping on a condom vs slipping on one is a very different action

"Slip on" has the double meaning of "to put on (a garment) quickly" as well as "to slide on or down a slippery surface." (both Merriam-Webster) It's not immediately obvious that condoms stay slippery that long.

As editors, our job is to minimize potential ambiguities, even at the expense of additional words (unless you're writing poetry or comedy, where the wordplay is appropriate.) That's something you already know since it's in THE FUCKING STYLEBOOK (any stylebook, AP, APA, or Chicago.)

Trip is linked as related verb, so it's not a "very different action," a subtly different action at most. But I'll admit I wasn't giving it my full attention in five minutes before dinner. Change that weak-ass adjective to something that describes how the quality of the condom supports the verb in this case. Add a two-word prepositional phrase to make the action unambiguous. "We slip when stepping on your slimy condoms." That gives the full picture of what's going on with minimal changes to the sentence structure, no change to the active verb, and only two words added to the wordcount.

Or, you can continue to yell at readers forced to puzzle out ambiguity among two different, well-documented, and fully idiomatic meanings for "slip on."

How would you even trip on a condom?

Someone very well-endowed is wearing it, standing on a lower surface so that their dick is at floor level?

Er... if you're an editor for a living who can't think their way around something that simple, I'm a little concerned for your clients.

You skipped a critical word in the sentence to which you are responding. And some of the sentences suggested, while accurate, have been utter garbaage in terms of pleasant short-reading.

Re: Things that make you go "What is WRONG with people??"

(Anonymous) - 2017-02-23 03:42 (UTC) - Expand

"Many people leave used condoms on the floor. We often slip on them."

This works better, as ending the sentence with "them" breaks up the unintentional idiom. The word order of the idiom, if it were the other meaning, would be "slip them on." It is more clearly not this meaning.

Used condoms make us slip. Not as colloquial but still concise and gets the message across without that instant wtf reaction most people would have. Myself included,

"Used condoms make us slip" is just about the worst, least informative thing I've read today. How? In what way? The original sentence might make some people do a double-take, but this actively raises questions.

Re: Things that make you go "What is WRONG with people??"

(Anonymous) - 2017-02-23 01:56 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Things that make you go "What is WRONG with people??"

(Anonymous) - 2017-02-23 02:01 (UTC) - Expand

Honestly, there was a moment when I read it that way too. I have no idea why. I realized my mistake pretty quickly though.

Same. I don't think I'm particularly dumb or lacking in critical thinking (although I'm definitely sleep-deprived right now, so maybe that's why) and that was my first thought.

NAYRT

For me, it was because the OP titled the thread in a way that had me going in expecting something horrible. Trying on used condoms certainly fits the bill.

That was the way I read it first too, so I guess I'm with you in OP's basket of deplorables.

People who pass right in front of you so you have to break to miss them. What is wrong with you? Do you want to get in an accident? Do you want to die?

The stupid bar examiners who didn't explain the policies to the proctors or make them clear on the instructions. They said we could bring in prescription in original packaging. So I brought in my inhaler. It was fine yesterday, but today I was told that I couldn't take it in because my name wasn't on it. The instructions never said that. The proctors never said that. Also, they keep getting mad at us for starting late when there are 1400 or so people taking the bar and long lines to get into the building. People are already lined up around the block when they open the doors. And yet it is our fault, somehow. What is wrong with them?

and most of them have babies or little kids with them. A baby is not a shield. it will not make cars bounce harmlessly off you.

Eh, that's not surprising. People are so insta-everything these days, and that includes their stupid fucking mouths (or stupid fucking fingers in this case). After all, who's got the time to actually use one's brain before posting?

(On a side note, I'm a little more concerned about the freaks who just toss their nasty condoms on the hotel floors instead of putting them in the trash bin. Of course, that pales in comparison to the nastier shit I hear people do in hotel rooms. Why are humans so gross and inconsiderate?)

I work in retail, so mostly everything makes me go "What is WRONG with people?"

After my first "doo-doo bandit" I mostly relinquished my faith in humanity.

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