[ SECRET POST #5470 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #5470 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 33 secrets from Secret Submission Post #783.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Biggest wish for 2020

[pantswarrior]

Oh yeah, this is stuff I can relate to. I've been dealing with this since I was 9 (with, somehow, about a 8-10 year reprieve in my 20s-30s that came back the first time I had a stomach bug since I was a kid). Gastroparesis seems to be a part of it now, though it wasn't until a few years ago - that's part of what I mean above about uncontrolled SIBO (or the fact that I wasn't able to eat basically anything without pain for years) possibly messing up everything else.

My diet for the last several years is basically Ensure mixed with instant coffee and peppermint (because one thing I figured out on my own is that my stomach doesn't produce enough acid to digest stuff, so I have to either agitate it or give it some additional acid) and spoonfuls of peanut butter/nutella (mixed with ginger or tabasco for the same reason) because they're high-calorie even in small amounts. It's helped me to not look like a skeleton anymore, at least. Pickles are about the only solid food I can semi-reliably eat anymore, presumably because of the high salt/vinegar content, but they're not calorie-dense so mostly I have to stick to nut butter if I want more than 400 calories a day. :P

I'm just... so incredibly tired of not being able to swallow more than a couple bites of anything at once, and then hours of pain even from just that, and not being able to move around much or talk or be in a moving vehicle for those hours because of the unrelenting reflux. (Spicy/high-acid stuff gives me LESS pain and sometimes actually gets rid of the reflux, but I still can't swallow anything, even water, without hours of misery.) I could survive indefinitely like this, I'm not dangerously underweight anymore, but since I can't do anything I used to enjoy except SOMETIMES concentrate enough to write fic... I don't really see any reason to keep on going. (I keep telling people I'll try to finish the epic stuff I've been sitting on before I go though, hahah.)