fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #881 ]

⌈ Secret Post #881 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS. Random penises and nudity, but nothing full-on pornographic.

101.

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102.

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103.

[Robin Hood]

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104.

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105.

[Patrick Wolf]

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106.

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107.

[Totally Captivated]

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108. [SPOILERS for Criminal Minds]

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109.

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110.

[Naruto, Gintama]

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111.

[Elizabeth and Mary Tudor]

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112.

[Watchmen/Star Trek]

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113.

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114.

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115.

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116.

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117.

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118.

[Catweazle]

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119.

[BtVS]

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120.

[Sherlock Holmes]

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121.

[Harry Potter/LoTR]

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122.

[SGA]

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123.

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124.

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125.

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126.

[Rory Gallagher]

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127.

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128.

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129.

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130.

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131.

[Avatar, HP]

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132.

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133.

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134.

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135.

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136.

[Edgar Wright - not a repeat]

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137.

[Skins]

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138.

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139.

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140.

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141.

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142.

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143.

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144.

[Princess Tutu]

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145.

[TMNT]

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146.

[Torchwood]

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147.

[Madagascar]

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148.

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149.

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150.

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151.

[Megan Fox]

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152.

[HP]

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153.

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154.

[Sting/Paul McCartney]

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155.

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156.

[Avatar]

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157.

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158.

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159.

[Afro-Ken]

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160.

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161.

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162.

[James May]

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163.

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164.

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165.

[Simon Pegg]

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166.

[HIMYM]

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167.

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168.

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169.

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170.

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171.

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172.

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173.

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174. [porns]
http://i40.tinypic.com/f4h4yh.jpg

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175.

[Maria-sama Ga Miteru]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 080 secrets from Secret Submission Post #126.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - doing it wrong ], [ 1 - personal attack ], [ 1 - posted three times ], [ 1 - needs some handy links ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

sorry, no. I'm not going to carry the weight of someone's pain just because they experience it. Experiencing pain/offense is not a virtuous, valid experience in and of itself, the cause needs to be justly correlated for me to give a flying fuck, adjust what I'm doing, and coddle them into the night.

^ i couldn't agree more with this comment

...I bet you are simply a delightful person to be around.

probably a lot more fun than most.

Better than the idiots who just accept whatever they're told and believe their own opinion is completely invalid the moment someone tells them they don't like it.

Carpets are fucking annoying.

Hmm, wow. I didn't realize it was either one or the other.

I suppose acknowledging what the other person is saying and where they are coming from is completely out of the question.

The comment you were replying to only stated they would require a reason to sympathize with the person telling them they feel hurt by a comment, rather than just accepting that they shouldn't say it.

Isn't the fact that your words/actions offended and/or hurt another human being reason enough? You don't have to agree that your behavior is offensive, but you should at least acknowledge that another individual has had different experiences and your words/actions may have evoked some emotions in them they would rather not feel.

It's just a matter of being respectful. :/

Isn't the fact that your words/actions offended and/or hurt another human being reason enough?

Considering the world we live in, and the billions of people we share it with, all with their own life experiences and triggers and soft spots, pretty much any statement anyone makes that expresses an opinion is guaranteed to offend/hurt someone. If you want to spend your entire life apologizing for that, that's you.

I (the originally person you replied to btw) have a lot of soft spots. I share them if someone hits there if I think it's rational. Whether the speaker has crossed a line or not. Because honestly, just looking for an example, I'm sure you offend MANY people by using Disney-princess themed icons. And I think it'd be disrespectful to yourself to apologize if someone called you on that because of their OWN issues. You are not them. You have your own reasons for using those icons. That is valid. Someone getting hurt by that is irrational, and they shouldn't dump it on you, and expect YOU to bend over for them.

Maybe it's just me, but if you hurt someone unintentionally for any reason...isn't the natural reaction to apologize? It's the same as if you'd stepped on their foot - "Sorry, I didn't mean to" is not only the first, most basic response, but it's easy to say and expresses what I'd hope is one's reaction to inadvertently causing someone pain: regret and an assertion that it wasn't intentionally malicious.

I agree that if a person's reaction is irrational or out of proportion with whatever offense you've given them, then you shouldn't automatically change your behavior just on that basis alone. But it's not so black and white that you have to either ignore people's feelings, or cater to them unconditionally, either. Acknowledging that you've upset someone doesn't automatically forfeit the rights of the person who did so; anyone who thinks so, on either side of the issue, is wrong. But what prevents the offender from working with the offended to figure out a way that they can both be happy? Maybe it involves putting up warnings, or cut tags, or a little compromise on both sides. But civilized people don't solve their disagreements by running rampant over the people on the other side of a debate. (Well, they do, quite often, but they're not what I consider civilized.)

It's perfectly possible to respect the feelings of others without automatically becoming a doormat. Anyone who thinks that because they've been offended their every wish must be catered to until they're back in a contented state of mind is rather disturbingly spoiled...but anyone who thinks that taking other people into consideration at all is the slippery slope to being walked all over and thus refusing to compromise an inch is being deliberately sociopathic. Neither extreme is a good one to take.

Agreed x 10,000, bb. :)

Well,

callie_chan pretty much said what I was going to, but yeah, maybe my Disney-princess icons offend somebody. That doesn't mean I should dismiss their feelings just because I'm not offended by Disney-princess icons. Emotions are irrational, and maybe they have a reason for feeling the way they do. Who am I to judge? I can at least listen to their reasons and acknowledge that something I did, unintentionally, hurt them.

But I guess we view the world in different ways.

And who the fuck are you exactly?
Sorry, but I doubt that most people are even thinking that they're asking you to carry their "weight" for them, oh unfortunately Burdened One.
(Not that you necessarily could...)
No, experiencing pain isn't a virtue of itself, but when a person shares their thoughts/feelings/experiences is to educate/enlighten another (intent not withstanding).
If I or anyone were to share with you experiences of being hurt or being a descendant of various cruelties and obstacles, please DO NOT fashion yourself a martyr of our supposed guilt-tripping.
WE are human, reaching out to a another human. No one rational expects anyone to feel 100% of what they feel, but to understand, acknowledge the wrongs and maybe examine yourself for the better are the beginnings of wisdom, empathy and love.
What qualifications does one need to elicit a listening ear, exactly--especially one of your precious ones?

[ SECRET POST #881 ]

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from the anon who posted below

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