[ SECRET POST #6109 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6109 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 18 secrets from Secret Submission Post #873.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

My small moment of ick is when a young girl/woman is murdered and her family talks about all the things they'll miss out on and it's always framed like, "I'll never see her walk down the aisle, I'll never hold my grandbabies in my arms" and I'm like... what if she didn't want to get married or have kids? You're assuming she'd have done both of those things.

It's a small nitpick, and sure, some of the aforementioned victims expressed a desire for marriage and babies before they were taken, so fair enough. But I can't help thinking of all the women who had a different plan for their lives, being talked about ONLY as a loss in terms of being married and producing offspring. If I get murdered, I hope people are honest and say, "Well, she wasn't interested in dating, long term relationships OR kids and I think she might've been ace, tbh and also she just wanted to be left alone to live her damn life but that doesn't mean it's okay she's dead".

[(Anonymous)]

what if she didn't want to get married or have kids? You're assuming she'd have done both of those things.

YES. That bugs me too, and is so, so common in pretty much any situation where a girl/woman dies (whether she's murdered, or dies in a car accident or something). I wish people wouldn't assume so many things about the kind of lives complete strangers would've led if they'd been able to.

I read a tribute to a little girl who was murdered once, and it included the standard getting married/having kids stuff, but it was framed more as a 'what could've been' type thing, and it also mentioned other things like 'she could've been a scientist who cured cancer' or 'she could've written the next great American novel' or 'she could've gone to the moon', and when it mentioned her getting married, it didn't assume it would've been to a man (and actually even was like 'maybe she would've someday realized she wasn't even a she at all, but a trans guy'). It was pretty long, with a whole bunch of hypothetical things she could've done with her life, and the overall point was like 'look at all the things she could've potentially done, but she never will because she was murdered and it's so fucking tragic'. I thought it was really interesting and was done in a much more real and human way than you usually hear murder victims talked about.

[(Anonymous)]

That's a way better tribute than most victims get, that's for sure.

[(Anonymous)]

Bleakly, part of me always wonders if 'no grandbabies' is related to why the victim was killed.

[(Anonymous)]

What? Are you trying to say people kill their kids because they won't give them grandkids?

[(Anonymous)]

Almost nobody says those things.

[(Anonymous)]

NAYRT

Not sure where you live or what sorts of news sources you pay attention to, but I hear those things every. fucking. time. someone dies. Or maybe you're interested in those things, so it doesn't even register with you. For those of us who aren't, it stands out.