[ SECRET POST #6264 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6264 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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[Fandom: Tiān Guān Cì Fú/Heaven Official's Blessing
Ship: Beefleaf (Shi Qingxuan and He Xuan)]



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[Music, Drake/Kendrick Lamar beef, What's the Beef? Youtube channel]



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[X-Files s04e10, "Paper Hearts" ]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 07 secrets from Secret Submission Post #895.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Funny. Recently, I wondered if it would be OK for me to add in a comment on my author's notes that if anyone wanted to create their own sequel or version of the worldbuilding they are more than welcome. Because I've gotten requests or asks about if I would write more for some fics I've published.
And honestly, I would love to see other writers continue a story or reinterpretation to a story I wrote, especially for fics where I'm satisfied with the story I wrote but a reader is asking for a sequel (mostly because I'm curious where the reader wants/thinks the story will go).

But also, a few years ago a fellow writer in the fandom I was in was friendly to the point we talked in DMs about our writings. It didn't take long for this writer to start acting cagey and they began contributing less in our conversations. I didn't want to believe it was because of them comparing our fics/fic stats but I noticed how their attitude changed and how much more social and nicer they became when one of their fics started doing big numbers and exceeded my popular fic.

I get enough of this weird fucking "I'm silently competing with you" bullshit with my siblings and the few IRL friends I have. I don't need it in my fucking hobbyist spaces.

Legit, the second I get a sniff of this with people in my life I back off and try to keep interactions minimal.

Hard to fucking believe but I do want to see others thrive and be joyful at their hobbies/tasks they do.
But at the same time, I'm not infallible; I also would like patience, grace and support when it comes to my job and/or interests.

I'm not telling you about the good feedback I've gotten to brag. I'm telling you because something made me feel good and I want to share my joy.
I don't know if the people in my life are unaware or just don't care but the ways they react (nonchalance or straight up ignoring) hurts my feelings.
It makes me feel like they don't care about me, and like they even resent/detest me when I'm happy or "doing well".

Also, more than once I've tried to tell my friends/siblings "what you said/did/lack thereof hurt my feelings" and every single time I was met with excuses as to why it's my fault for being too much.
Again, feeling like their feelings matter more than mine.

So yeah, no thanks to collaborations. Most people I've interacted with prioritize competition and it's a big emotional trigger for me and since I can't get past that hurdle, ain't happening any time soon much as I would ideally want it to be a more common thing.

[(Anonymous)]

This happens with everyone you interact with?

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

Not everyone but the people things like this have happened with were people in my inner circle. I don’t call someone "friend" quickly.

There are people I am friendly with but I wouldn't consider us as friends. And there are a lot of people in my life I am friendly with but wouldn't consider us close enough to call each other friend.

And not all of my siblings are competitive jerks, just one but that one pits themselves against all of us as well as take up opportunities to try to pit the rest of us against each other. We're all full grown adults now, I wish they'd stop.