[ SECRET POST #6483 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6483 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 36 secrets from Secret Submission Post #926.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

If you're good with multiple partners, that's perfectly fine, as long as your multiple partners all feel the same. I don't judge folks who enjoy an arrangement where everybody is on board, regardless of what it is (just as long as it's also consenting).

But CHEATING means a lack of faithfulness. If you signed up for something where nobody in the relationship cheats, and someone cheats, then that's a problem. If there wasn't such an agreement, then having multiple partners wouldn't be cheating. Someone could be hurt by the misunderstanding, but it's not cheating.

[(Anonymous)]

Right, like what if a person who has cheated multiple times before wants a poly or open relationship, would that change things and make them acceptable then? That could be a factor too.

[(Anonymous)]

Anyone who wants to hook up with them can do so. Personally, I couldn't. One, because I'm not into poly or open relationships, and two, I still couldn't look past the cheating, as past behavior is a good indicator of future behavior (unless the person really reflects and works on themselves and makes a conscious effort to NOT repeat it).

Like, say I were into poly relationships. What if we agreed to set the number of partners per person to something like 3 or 4? And I was happy with my 3 while the other person decided, "well, it IS an open relationship" and decides to sleep with up to 10 other people? That would still be "cheating" as the other person is not abiding by the agreement. Now, if no conditions were set other than "this is an open relationship," it wouldn't be cheating.

But all of that is irrelevant since non-monogamy and cheating are both full stops for me.

[(Anonymous)]

IMO, not really. I mean good for them for FINALLY figuring out that they're not interested in monogamy, but anyone who cheats BEFORE suddenly realizing they're interested in open relationships is seriously eehhhhhhhhhhh. At best, they're still the type to be unfaithful to their vows* and disrespectful of other peoples' boundaries because they can't keep it in their pants.

* and stable, healthy open relationships have established rules that all parties have agreed upon, too! So being bad at rules in a monogamous relationship suggests a propensity to be bad at rules, period.