[ SECRET POST #6892 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6892 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 18 secrets from Secret Submission Post #984.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

Another night without killing myself.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[philstar22]

I'm sorry you feel that way. I wish things would get better for you, I really do.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

I wasn't meant to live.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[philstar22]

I don't agree, but I'm not you, and I don't know what your life is like or what awful things you are dealing with. All I can say is that I wish things would get better for you and hope that you can find some people who care about you and see your value. And most of all I hope you start feeling better about yourself. Self-hate sucks, I've struggled with it my whole life. But you do matter.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

Who are you? I find it hard to believe anyone here at all cares about me. You don't know me. And half of the people are just trolls.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[philstar22]

You are right, I don't know you. But I believe everyone has value. I'm not a troll, I've been here for years. I'm just sorry you feel so miserable. And I feel bad because I relate. I've been there. I hated myself for a long time and thought the world would be better without me (although personally death terrified me, so I never got to the point of trying anything).

My life has gotten better and I'm working on fighting the self hate. But the thoughts are still there. But everyone matters. You matter. The world is better with you in it.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

i ruined my life and i can't find a way up and out of it.
i think my only escape is death.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[philstar22]

I'm sorry you feel that way, and I really hope things get better for you.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

This is almost verbatim what you told me last night.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

So? Doesn't mean it isn't still true.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

I've been there – twice. In those situations I was totally stuck and could not see a way out. But there was a way out, and I kind of knew it at the time, it just seemed so hard and shameful and only able to address the center part of the problem, not the millions of symptoms around it, that I dismissed it. But when it all came crashing down around me, I was forced to go that path anyway. Not having the cloud of panic and anxiety of "when will it all come out" above my head was incredibly freeing, like the first day of sunshine after winter only a thousand times stronger, and then that hard path became ... doable. Pushing through that every day was less exhausting and difficult than pushing through the fear of discovery before.

And now, yes, there are still consequences. I have lost opportunities in my life that I will never get back, and there are parts of my past I don't like to talk about with friends and acquaintances. But in my everyday life now, those months and years of fear, shame, despair and anxiety are like a particularly awkward moment in school: when I remember it I cringe, but most of the time, I don't think about it. I've moved on.

I hope you can get there, too. There is a life After, and it is worth sticking around for.

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

Who is this?

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

Do you really not understand that humans can care about people they've never met?

Re: Good news/happy thread

[(Anonymous)]

Then somebody help me. Instead of trolling me and offering repetitive comments.