fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #7022 ]

[ SECRET POST #7022 ]

⌈ Secret Post #7022 ⌋

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

When I tell someone something, and they reword it and then repeat it back to me like it was their idea. I had a stressful week but it's over now, and I don't have anything going on this weekend, so I'm going to just drop my worries for the time being and try to relax. It's been a few shitty weeks, and I had something big to deal with Friday, and I want to have a few days where I just do chill stuff without worrying. I told my boyfriend that in a text. Then, he called a few minutes later and was like, "Your stressful stuff is done, now you can just relax over the weekend" and I'm irrationally annoyed by it. Yes, that is what I said in that text to you. You just repeated what I said right back to me. I'm sure he meant well by it, but I'm tired of him doing that, because he does it way too often. If you want to agree and say "Yeah, that's a good idea" that's one thing, but it comes across like he thinks he just came up with it on his own.

This... kinda sounds like something that could be innocuous, like he's trying to agree with what you said by repeating something similar and omitting "just like you said earlier!" because obviously you said it.

Now I'm wondering if some people are taking my repeating their words to them as affirmation, as me trying to steal their ideas or something...

NAYRT

To me, this is about tone and how you word it. My dad does this sometimes, and it does annoy me and my mom. He'll act pleased as can be like he just figured out a great solution to a problem and is expecting us to praise him. But it's something we were just discussing ourselves and that he sat there and listened to us talk about. I actually think with my dad it's that he kind of zones out and isn't, like, CONSCIOUSLY listening, so he doesn't even realize he's doing it. And he genuinely thinks he came up with it on his own.

Idk about OP's boyfriend though. Is he trying to be reassuring, or condescending, or something else? Dunno for sure.

My partner does the same thing. He's barely listening to what I say, so I'll propose and idea and he'll just grunt or go "uh huh". And then a few days later, he'll come up with the same damn idea and get annoyed when I don't act like it's a brilliant concept he just came up with on his own.

When a business or establishment has information that their patrons/attendees would benefit from knowing, but nobody has taken it upon themselves to just make a quick little announcement.

A few examples: if a particular form of payment is not working, and there's a big lineup of people, but they're only informing each person as they reach the front of the line. Or if a specific item that is very popular is not currently available (like say anything espresso-based at a coffee shop). Or if they KNOW that lots of people are getting in the wrong lineup, and there's no signage or the signage is very unclear, but they just let all those people stay in the wrong lineup.

Just make a quick announcement. If I find out something like that as a patron, I will always just raise my voice and make the announcement myself, so that nobody ends up wasting their time unnecessarily. I keep it short and I don't embellish in anyway, just: The situation appears to be [X], in case that affects your plans.

Replied to the wrong comment, sorry!

Ugh, this. Honestly, it might be partly a gender thing because I see SO MANY women (in a workplace situation) talk about how they'll say X and then nobody pays attention until a man says it, and then everyone is oohh, great idea!

I agree, it does feel like something of a gender thing to me. I'm sure there are women who do it too, but I feel like I see it more from men.

The older I get, the more I realize just how deeply ingrained sexism is in so many aspects of modern life. It's totally normalized for most people, women included. Very disturbing, tbh.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #7022 ]

Re: Pet peeves!

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SA

Re: Pet peeves!

Re: Pet peeves!

Re: Pet peeves!