fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1174 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1174 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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. . . Oh. D: Wow. I never knew that. I'm surprised I never knew that, because I lived in a pretty run-down part of San Antonio for five years of my life (absolutely dreadful) and heard pretty much everything.

Thanks for letting me know. Sorry if I sounded insensitive/like a jerkass before. /: But wow, and here I thought OP was just being a jerkass by ragging on her weight. Nice to know that he/she is not only a jerkass, but a racist jerkass to boot. xP

No no, you didn't sound like a jerkass to me--you honestly didn't know. :) I think it could be regional, I grew up in Texas too and never heard it until I moved to a different southern state.

We can both agree on the OP, though. Yikes.

But wait. If the person above didn't know and you didn't know until you moved to a different state, why assume the OP knows. I honestly had no clue it was a racial slur until reading it in the thread, and I prefer to give the OP the benefit of the doubt that he/she didn't know either. (Now that I know, I won't use it, and I would hope the OP is the same.)

Regarding the actual secret. I haven't seen anyone glorify her weight, OP. Saying someone is pretty and/or a good actress doesn't mean that she couldn't be healthier. Do you expect them to say "Oh what a fatty!" every time she's mentioned? I certainly hope not.

Oh, I have no idea whether the OP knows or not, and I wasn't one of the people replying above. I'm just saying it's pretty suspicious, and that there's a good reason the people above might feel offended. I would love to believe that OP is completely innocent, but seeing as how F!S has racetrolling secrets all the time, and there's someone in this very thread who has no problems throwing around the n-word, eeeh. :|

You're an idiot. Someone throws you a link and all of the sudden the OP is racist? The expression is meant in the "if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it's a duck" way.

I did not know spade" was racist, neither did numerous people in this thread and I find it SICKENING that people are reinforcing it as a racist term...and others (you) are just letting it happen.

So it's the you're the real racists! defense? Have fun with that.

Nope, just pointing out the way words and phrases are reinforced to be "bad" because people need to be offended.

Just because you "didn't know" it was a racial slur doesn't mean it wasn't, though. Saying "I didn't know it so it must not be true" is just your way of defending your ignorance. It's not wrong to be ignorant, but it is wrong to treat that ignorance as though it's right.

Different words have different connotations depending on where you go. For instance, in England "fag" means cigarette and isn't used as a derogatory term toward homosexuals at all. That doesn't mean that it's not a slur in America. I'd never heard "spade" used as a slur before, but that doesn't mean that it's not a slur in other areas -- and who says that the OP didn't know that it was? If this was a non-offensive secret to begin with, I'd have more faith in the OP, but given the fact that the OP was already acting like a jerkass, I have little reason to give the OP the benefit of the doubt.

Wrong again in regards to ignorance. Wow.

How on earth was OP acting like a jackass? Their secret was dead on. Nice girl, nice actress, not the best weight role-model for little girls, and the kudos for being heavy is baffling. You could use some reading comprehension

Really? So you believe that it's perfectly acceptable to be complacent in your ignorance? To not want to learn more about the world around you? If so, then I really don't think we can continue to talk. I don't have a problem with people that are innocently ignorant -- I'm that way myself at times. I do take issue with people who would rather sit back and be ignorant -- who believe "ignorance is bliss" -- than learn more. People who feel like ignorance is a security blanket and convenient excuse.

OP was acting like a jerkass because the secret said nothing about it being a "weight-specific" role model. Instead, OP said that the actress was not a good role model for little girls because of her weight. Being a role model has nothing to do with that. Being a role model instead has to do with who you are and what you do. If this actress is a kind person and if this actress is successful, then yes, this actress is a perfectly good role model for young kids. It doesn't matter what she looks like or what her weight is, except -- as others have pointed out -- to prove that you don't need to meet the Hollywood norm of "beautiful" in order to succeed.

As for her weight, you know what? I don't know who that actress is, and I'm probably not going to go look into her work any time soon because that's just not the type of thing that interests me. But looking at that picture? I think she's beautiful, and it doesn't really matter what you think or say. Kudos to her not for "being heavy" (though I honestly don't have a problem with that; I'm not so shallow as to think that outer appearance is what makes a person), but for being comfortable in her own skin and putting herself out there despite the very obvious bias in Hollywood and in general society against people of heavier weight.

And no, before you say anything, I am not overweight. Actually, I'm underweight, despite my decidedly unhealthy eating habits (my main diet consists of ice cream, cookies, bagels with Nutella, and other sweet things). I just really don't have a tolerance for shallow, ignorant cowards who have nothing better to do than criticize others for their weight and then needlessly insult those who don't share the same opinion.

In other words, anon? This conversation is finished, especially since you apparently don't have the courage to back up your comments by logging in to your account. Show some spine next time.

NOT the original anon, just jumping in here...

I don't think the point is that ignorance is good, and learning is bad, but in this case what you're "learning" is to be offended by something that is not offensive on the surface, has no offensive undertones, and (to the best of our knowledge) was not intended to be offensive. It's one thing to call someone ignorant for not knowing that a word is used as/originated as a racial slur, it's quite another to insist that they stop using perfectly innocuous phrases because someone may misunderstand and be offended.

Also, I'm not logged into an lj account because I honestly don't have one, and don't see the point in getting one just to prove to fandom!secrets that I'm not a coward (whatever that means).

I never said that they should stop using the phrase. I, for one, will continue to use "call a spade a spade;" I'm just going to be more careful about where I use it.

But if you'd look up the comment thread, you'd see that not only did this original anon jump in by calling me an idiot (no, I'm not b'awwing, just pointing out that it's not as if I'm the one that started this argument), but also insinuated that "because I didn't know it was a slur, it must not be one." That's a logical fallacy. Just because you don't know something's offensive doesn't mean it isn't, and all it DOES mean is that A) you should be more careful about where you use said phrase from now on, and B) there is the possibility that the OP DID know, given the fact that other users on LJ did.

I never said the person should stop using that phrase. All I said is that there is a distinct possibility that the OP knew the other meaning. Original!Anon was the one who started in by getting EXTREMELY defensive and aggressive for no apparent reason, even after I tried to be nice.

And for the record? Saying "Wrong again about ignorance" after I quite clearly say that it's fine to be ignorant but not fine to be complacent in ignorance is pretty much saying "ignorance good, learning bad."

THIS. :D

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