fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1402 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1402 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

101.

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[Dirt Poor Robins: Last Days of the Leviathan]

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[Guild Wars]

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130.

[Umineko No Naku Koro Ni]

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[Whites]

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133. http://i56.tinypic.com/2dt3zns.jpg
[linking this image just in case (depiction of dub/non-con)]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS BELOW ----- ]

134. [SPOILERS for BtVS]

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135. [SPOILERS for Metalocalypse]

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136. [SPOILERS for D. Gray-man]

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137. [SPOILERS for Dollhouse]

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138. [SPOILERS for Chuck]

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139. [SPOILERS for Nabari no Ou]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS BELOW ----- ]

140. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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141. [TRIGGER WARNING for half-dressed real child in the image, pedophilia, and on]
http://i53.tinypic.com/5znuo5.jpg

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142. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape, also blood/violence/implied rape in the image]
http://i55.tinypic.com/se7nlt.png

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143. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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144. [TRIGGER WARNING for incest]

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145. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #200.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - titc + "menstruation" is not a common trigger ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

140.
http://oi56.tinypic.com/209so6q.jpg

Oh man, this is a tough situation. I mean, if you're getting messed up emotionally by this, then it's not okay? But if you're just worried that other people like your stories, and your friend is still giving your consent, then it's okay. Can you give yourself permission to...not to enjoy the fame, perhaps, but to accept it?

As for hurting your friend, as long as you're checking in with her regularly, then I don't know what else you can do. It's an unusual situation, but you are very good to help your friend in such a way. Good luck to the both of you.

I think you just need to make sure you and your friend are very open about this. That's the bottom line. You're obviously somebody she feels she can trust and so I think she would be honest with you.

Uh...

You seem to be a nice person, OP, but your friend knows that a woman getting raped is a completely different experience than a man getting raped (if you really wanted to write "he is a fictional..."), right?

... lol I don't even

Man, how is that even relevant to the discussion? If it helps the person cope and it's not a damaging method...

(I mean btw you're wrong, unless you mean to say that it is different because a male has a whole legal system and society stacked against him - that will say he's lying, that he's "a faggot," that he must have woken up to find that she was really ugly [or other assorted homophobic and transphobic statements], that men can't be raped [especially not by those weak wimminz - thanks, misogyny, you're hurting everyone here!], and so on - if that's what you're going for, you're totally right)

different anon. Women who've been raped have a whole legal system and most of society stacked against them too (and people will say they're lying, they just changed their minds about wanting sex, that they're malicious harpies, that they deserved it because of the clothes they were wearing or because they weren't virgins anyway), but I take your point that men who've been raped have even less support.

Of course! It's horrible for both, and I wouldn't try to compare them - in either case, it's a stealing away of bodily autonomy and often mental too. But it is generally accepted that women do get raped, there are awareness campaigns, there are organizations dedicated to helping and that encourage them to accept that it did happen and try to move past it. This doesn't carry over into the legal system for either sex/gender, though, which is a damnable shame.

Fuck. You.

wow. That is uh. that's pretty special of you to say.

I haven't been in this exact situation, but I did once write a rape-recovery fic (with terrible magical healing sex and everything - in my defence, this was years ago) for a close friend who I knew had been raped when she was a child. It was about her favourite character, and while she didn't request it as your friend did, as soon as I floated the idea she encouraged it all the way and she was my beta throughout.

Apart from the dubious quality of the prose, it was a pretty fulfilling experience. The main difference between my situation and yours seems to be that your friend is still very much in the initial process of working through her feelings. It also seems like YOU are still in the process of working through your feelings - and honestly I think a lot of people who've written serious rape/recovery fics have experienced unwelcome feelings about it, and while those feelings are totally fictional and not anything like what our beloved friends have to deal with, it can be heavy emotional work and it's okay to give yourself time to deal with it as you write.

If it's too much for you? I'd tell her, if I were you; it's not like it's a mystery that some people aren't comfortable with noncon fic.

But before giving up, I think you should give yourself a break, do some thinking and feeling and come back to it in a couple of weeks. Maybe you just need more time.

OP, it sounds like you're struggling with the concept of writing violation-fic itself (and the inherent wrongness of rape) and getting approval for it. Perhaps you feel that sensualizing an act of violence, and getting praise for your fic, is somehow promoting the idea that rape is - in some way - a good thing. And is also taking advantage of your friend's suffering.

But there are two factors in play here that should mitigate your fears. First and foremost - she asked you to write this. She beta'd it, approved it, and encouraged you to post it. This really is one of her ways of working through her trauma.

People who are victimized frequently re-live the experience, playing it out in their heads, trying to figure out what they should have done differently, just trying to make some sort of sense out of it all. Often they find comfort in re-scripting the assault which helps make the victim feel a little more in control of the situation, and therefore a little better at dealing with the aftermath.

tldr: She asked you to do this, and you've made her feel better. That you're worried about taking advantage of her pain simply means that you're a decent human being. All you need to do now is assure her that if she ever start to feel bad about the fic in the future, you'll take it down in a heartbeat.

And from all the other silent victims out there who don't have a friend to confide in -- thank you for being a good human being.

Just jumping in to say that you are an amazing friend to be doing that, OP. :)

I think you are an amazing, excellent friend, and as long as you're willing to take directions from your friend and steer the story in the way she needs it to be steered, you're doing a good thing.

Hey there OP,

I just want to say, that the non-con fics truly do help with rape recovery. They are very therapeutic, so thank you for helping your friend and others like her and myself.

You are an angel delivering comfort to us through fanfic in our time of need. You are not doing anything wrong, and you couldn't write something "wrong" if you tried. Everyone's experience is different.

Thank you so much. You and authors like you help more than words could ever explain. Keep on keepin' on <3

[ SECRET POST #1402 ]

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It's Not Unusual

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