Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2011-04-09 03:42 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2011-04-09 03:42 pm
[ SECRET POST #1558 ]
⌈ Secret Post #1558 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 12 pages, 291 secrets from Secret Submission Post #223.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 - take it to comments ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2011-04-09 08:56 pm (UTC)(link)It seems like the vast majority of people on my f-list have some sort of unhealthy relationship with food (eating too much, eating too little, ect), in the middle of either a manic or depressive episode, am transitioning genders or deciding they don't have one at all...
It gets me down a lot because I can't ever say: someone cut me off in traffic and it really upset me. When one of my friends just got out of a stint in a mental hospital, or when three of my friends threatened to commit suicide around last Christmas. ('tis the season?)
So. Yeah.
I'm overwhelmed reading my friends list nowadays. The last thing I want to do is hurt someone, but I'm not sure how much I can take. I'm not a care-giver personality and it's constant, constant, constant bombardment of witnessing all of these major issues... I don't know how much more I can take of this.
I'm on the verge of walking away. And I know this makes me a not very likable person. It's why I'm anon.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2011-04-09 09:02 pm (UTC)(link)I'm one of those people with majorbad issues. But you know what? If you're my friend, I also care that you got cut off in traffic. The only time I start to get a bit miffed is if you try to minimize my problems ("i'm sorry you were abused, this is just like the time i stubbed my toe") or if you start playing the agony Olympics like the OP seems to be doing. it doesn't matter that my problems are "worse" than yours, it only matters when you start trying to be the victim because you don't have problems. I care about your traffic problems. I do.
Further, I don't need you to leave a caring comment on every post I make. My journal is for me to talk about my problems. You're not obligated to constantly pat me on the butt about them, I promise.
I don't need to "out-problem" you, but I don't appreciate you trying to take away my space to vent because it makes you uncomfortable.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2011-04-09 09:43 pm (UTC)(link)Yes your journal is there to talk about your problems. Go right ahead. Especially if it helps.
However, personally, I am overwhelmed by it all. I know I can't be the only one.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2011-04-09 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
I am one of those people with mental health problems but that doesn't mean I don't care when my friends have a crappy day at work, or their washing machine breaks, or any other little annoyance that can really ruin your day. Hell, I bitch about those things too, probably more often than I complain about my mental problems.
If you are overwhelmed by your friends' issues and you don't know the right thing to say, there's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes it can help just to hear 'I'm not entirely sure what to say right now, but you know I'm thinking of you'. Sometimes, as the anon above said, you don't even need a response - you're venting because you want to vent and because it makes you feel better and you couldn't care less how many of your friends write back.