[ SECRET POST #1650 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1650 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 09 pages, 207 secrets from Secret Submission Post #236.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - hit/ship/spiration ], [ 1 2 - omgiknowthatotherOP ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom.livejournal.com]

35. http://i52.tinypic.com/68em0w.png

[wrestlingdog.livejournal.com]

I'm assuming they're referring to all the porn in fandom.

[kilaen.livejournal.com]

"But whether James really did take off Snape's pants, Harry never found out."

"Harry was to be found, yet again, kneeling on the floor of Snape's office."

"Harry's heart began to pump very fast indeed. Defense against external penetration?"

" 'I'm his head of house and I shall decide how hard or otherwise to be.' "

"Something silver white, something enormous erupted from the end of his wand."

" "He came last night, when you were in bed." "

"Harry stuffed his wand hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent."

"[Harry] pushed the door ajar and peered inside--and a horrible scene met his eyes. Snape and Filch were inside, alone. Snape was holding his robes above his knees."

[mollywobbles867.livejournal.com]

I don't understand this secret at all. Do you think people are getting sexual fluids on the books or something?

[honestys-easy.livejournal.com]

First off, you can get ebooks from your library. Most libraries now have downloadable ebooks through their websites and Overdrive. So, no need to stop using your library. /librarianrant

Secondly, why do you think people fap to the source material? There's hardly anything sexually graphic in the Twilight books, afaik (that would be sexy, anyway...) and there's nil in the HP books. If you were talking the bodice-ripper paperbacks I could understand, but these? Most of these readers take their masturbatory fantasties to fandom and the plethora of smutfics and art that the Internet provides.

If I were you I'd be more worried about the public computer terminals than the books themselves.

[rabidsamfan.livejournal.com]

This.

I've tried e-books. Gave up on them as a primary choice the first time the damn battery ran out of juice right in the middle of a good story. (The e-reader is okay for fanfic, though, thanks to AO3. Short fanfic, anyway.)

[time-ambassador.livejournal.com]

Wow, there is just NO sense to be had in this secret.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh but the world is full of gross stuff. Everywhere you go. On any touchable surfaces. Better become a paranoid hermit and never leave yourself, OP.

[(Anonymous)]

So then wash your hands after touching them. I use anti-bacterial wet wipes to wipe off the covers of all books I check out from the library and books I buy used. I'm sure that pretty much does nothing, but it makes me feel better. I'm also sure all the nice, relatively clean, new books I've purchased and handled a lot since then are actually pretty germy too, as are your keyboard or reading tablet or whatever else you'd read ebooks on. That's what happens when you touch things.

If people were jerking off...uh, I dunno, right onto the book (what exactly is freaking you out, anyway?) you'd notice that the pages are all stuck together for some odd reason and the mysterious dried up stains and can therefore easily avoid that copy of the book.

[lady-lilith.livejournal.com]

I might be squicked to touch the actual porn books from the library, but I think Harry Potter is pretty safe other than food stains. But that's me trying to apply some logic to this crazysauce.

[(Anonymous)]

lol, what about the romance novels or the "spice up your dull, flacid marriage" books? Wouldn't they be, uh, juicier?

[warmuse.livejournal.com]

but what about your TV, OP? Do you turn off your TV just before TV series with huge fandoms airs, to protect your computer from the Oncoming Sex Juice?

[childings.livejournal.com]

OMG HOW WAS I ABLE TO SURVIVE COLLEGE WITHOUT CONTRACTING HERPES FROM BORROWED LIBRARY BOOKS

QUICK GET THE BLEACH

[kelly-h80.livejournal.com]

I would be more worried about people taking them into the toilet than actually jizzing on them. Those brown stains might not be chocolate. JS

[tenonthedot.livejournal.com]

It took my a while to understand what this secret meant. But my mother is a librarian, and she knows what happens to those books. That has never happened.

[ladyyuna07.livejournal.com]

D= WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT??!!!!!!!

*will now be borrowing her library's e-reader copies TYVM* T_______T

[ninety6tears.livejournal.com]

THEY'VE BEEN FLAGGED.

[(Anonymous)]

This is a cute secret. :)

It's true though, your average citizen doesn't know about the underground hordes of pornographic fiction these series have inspired. >.>

[(Anonymous)]

Now that's just retarded.

[copper-dimes.livejournal.com]

Um, as someone who works in a library, I'm honestly not sure what you're talking about. First of all, none of the libraries in my area (public or university) have any sort of a Harry Potter or Twilight display, and the library I work at only has one copy of each book, if that, and those are hidden away in the juvenile collection, which is kind of hidden itself (it's a university library; YA and children's books aren't a priority there). Most, if not all, displays for these series that I've seen have been in book stores, not libraries.

Second, why are you afraid of touching them? Do you think people masturbate with the books in hand or something and then get ejaculate all over the books because of the amount of porny fanfiction and fan art about the characters that's floating around the internet? That doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me, to be quite honest, but if that's what you believe, then more power to you. Really, I'd be more worried about the fact that the books are frequently read/checked out and thus there's a greater likelihood of someone handling the books with unwashed hands after using the restroom or something if germs are what bothers you.

Oh, and on that note, you'd best avoid the computer terminals at your libraries, OP. I'm not sure about most places, but the janitors don't really bother to clean those where I work, and you never know who's been using them and what they've touched.

[gabzillaz.livejournal.com]

...what?

[scribblingfemme.livejournal.com]

Well, once I did have the unfortunate luck of placing a copy of Dracula on hold that smelled like cat urine.

[wolfiemon.livejournal.com]

Ok.... wow there are a lot of weird secrets today.

But this is definitely the weirdest.

[(Anonymous)]

I definitely understand where you're coming from, anon. I know it's irrational, but sometimes I have trouble with this kind of thing, too.

I have OCD, so I know that's where it comes from with me. If you're having issues like this with other things, too, it might be a good idea to see a professional about anxiety. (If it's just this, I wouldn't worry about it, everyone has some weird irrational fears/thoughts.)

Sorry everyone else in this thread is kind of a jerk.