fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1679 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1679 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

11.

__________________________________________________

12.

__________________________________________________

13.

__________________________________________________

14.

__________________________________________________

15.

__________________________________________________

16.

__________________________________________________

17.

__________________________________________________

18.

__________________________________________________

19.

__________________________________________________

20.

__________________________________________________

21.

__________________________________________________

22.

__________________________________________________

23.

__________________________________________________

24.

__________________________________________________

25.

__________________________________________________

26.

__________________________________________________

27. [titc]

__________________________________________________

28.

__________________________________________________

29.

__________________________________________________

30.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 136 secrets from Secret Submission Post #240.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - hit/ship/spiration ], [ 0 - omgiknowthem ], [ 0 - take it to comments ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm aware that my SO fantasies about other people and I'm ok with that. I do find other people attractive too. Case in point. I feel guilty if I tune into a show every week just to watch another man I find attractive. It feels wrong to me and slightly obsessive or stalker-like. And no, he doesn't get angry about it. It's my own problem.

Man, I must be all kinds of obsessive stalker if watching a TV show for a hot guy is wrong... Hell, I'll watch shows I don't even like or movies that are gawd awful for certain guys that fuel my fantasies - (seriously... I willingly watched Codename: The Cleaner. CKR the things I do for you!!)

My husband finds it amusing as all hell and could care less because when it comes to acting out those fantasies? He's right there waiting. (And vice versa) Fantasy is normal and healthy and enjoying something purely for salacious reasons is a-okay. OP, stop beating yourself up and let yourself watch the show!

High five, anon! I haven't seen C:TC (yet) but I have watched many other pieces of crap for CKR! Mmmm.

*High fives*

Yeah, I would recommend watching C:TC on fast-forward - except for CKR's parts, of course. I'd say it's probably top of the 'worst of' list of piece of crap movies that CKR has been in.

CKR is the single reason that I've watched and gotten into SO MANY shows, too. Even if he's just in 1 episode as a throw-away character, I'll watch (and sometimes get hooked). The man is just guh... Sex on legs doesn't quite do him justice.

Curious, anon - are you young and/or is this one of your first relationships? This attitude tends to be more common when people are in that situation, I find. Most people tend to get over that with time or experience.

No, I'm not young and this isn't my first serious relationship. I didn't even used to think this way at all. I suspect the feelings are leftover from a past emotionally abusive relationship. That ex did get jealous over fantasizing about fictional characters or actors and he was insecure about it. Over the course of time in that relationship it probably got into my head that continuously watching someone I find attractive was something to feel bad about. He was quite the manipulative bastard. If you're wondering, I did end up leaving him.

Good for you! I hope that, with time and support from your new partner, as well as family and friends, you can feel more comfortable and secure with your own desires and feelings. Easier said than done, I know, but I think one of the greatest things you can do for yourself is to take back what you had and enjoyed in life before that asshole ruined them for you.

Oh, that does cast a lot more light on this.

You need to understand that emotionally-abusive relationships leave baggage that can last for years. You probably already do. Just because your abusive ex made you feel bad for being attracted to actors or characters doesn't mean it IS bad. It's not. At all. It's completely normal and it has nothing whatsoever to do with any real-life partner.

I've been there. I know what that kind of lingering baggage can do. The best and most important thing you can do for yourself is to get his voice out of your head once and for all. Actually, one mental trick I've used that helped me was to have arguments in my head with the specter of my ex once in a while--and joyously embrace everything that he used to criticize me for. That was good for me. Abusers often attack their victims' sources of enjoyment and inspiration, because they want to break the victims down into a state of total dependency.

So the issue isn't so much that you don't feel you can watch a show you enjoy because you find one of the characters attractive, it's just that you feel weird watching a show for a specific actor? I still wouldn't say that's all that bad, OP. I do the same thing with music. If I find a singer attractive I often give their music a chance, if only to watch them in the music video, and I think other a lot of other people do similar things. I personally don't think you have anything to feel guilty about, but it's up to you, I guess.

I know what you mean. When the first interest you take in a show is due to you finding one of the main actors hot it feels like you're watching for no reason other than to lust after him, right? It's good that your SO doesn't mind it, but if you do then it can't be helped.

[ SECRET POST #1679 ]

OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP

Re: OP