fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2003 ]

[ SECRET POST #2003 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2003 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 040 secrets from Secret Submission Post #286.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Some people do have hymens that cover the entire opening - this can easily be fixed surgically.

Do you have periods at all?

Yes, I have periods and they're pretty normal and regular.

I think that means it can't be completely imperforate but maybe it almost is? You probably should see a doctor or nurse even if it seems embarrassing, in case you do need surgical correction.

There's a link to some images here (images NSFW obv but the page I'm linking to is SFW).

http://www.lexic.us/definition-of/imperforate_hymen

Yeah, seeing a doctor is really my last resort but I guess I don't really have any other alternative.

Thanks for the link!

Well, you should be seeing a gyno once a year, anyway. Yes, even if you're a virgin; there are plenty of issues women can have with their reproductive organs that have nothing to do with they've had sex or not.

This. That's just good medical practice. You can ask questions while you are there, of course, but even when your sure everything is a-ok once a year is still a good idea.

i hate to say this but check your goddamn privilege.

-uninsured anon, there's only forty million of us in the usa

Yes, I did almost did mention I realize not everyone has access to insurance, doctors, etc; but I thought for once, people might realize someone is trying to make a helpful suggestion, and not feel the need to be an asshole to them.

Oh, are you also going to jump all over the ass of the person who replied and agreed with me? They sound pretty fucking privileged, too.

'be an asshole' lol tone argument, which I guess is the typical way to respond when someone asks someone else to check their class privilege.

Just to state the obvious, it's not a helpful suggestion to people (not all of whom are uninsured) to whom it would cause unnecessary hardship. It can easily turn into victim-blaming and poverty-shaming if medical issues are belatedly uncovered.

Class? Oh, you mean the class I'm in being well below the poverty line and on state-run health insurance? THAT "class"?

You don't know a goddamn thing about me; you sure the hell don't know what "class" I'm in.

Edited 2012-06-28 01:51 (UTC)

You can still have privilege no matter what class you are in.

Good advice for when people tell you to check your privilege - instead of getting angry and/or defensive, step back and take a minute to digest both what they are saying and your own reaction.

Re: TMI time

insanenoodlyguy - 2012-06-28 17:18 (UTC) - Expand

lol calling "tone argument", which I guess is the typical way to respond when someone points out you're being a dick.

Tell me about it.

I know it sucks being poor and uninsured and living in a country that hates women (it certainty pisses me off too), but saying "should be" is just a general way to show concern for and to educate the OP. OP sounds young and ignorant about her body, and even if she can't afford to go to a GYN, she should at least know that visits to a GYN are something that should be yearly, if she has access and can afford it. Plus, you know, she asked for advice, and going to a GYN is practical advice.

You are probably trolling, but I couldn't leave this one alone.

I wasn't trolling. Do you always react that way when you see someone call out class privilege?

I do when you call someone out in a thread where such a remark is uncalled for. It's an advice thread related to health issues. You've got to know that someone, rightfully, is going to mention seeing a doctor. OP may not be in the situation to take such advice, but the point of asking for advice is to pick and choose from the suggested options.

I understand that it's frustrating and irritating and scary when your options are "See a doctor," and you can't. But, it's still sound advice whether your privilege (or lack thereof) is a New York penthouse or an illegal garage apartment.

Do we need privilege disclaimers on advice? "Warning! Only heed advice if in a socioeconomic or sociocultural status conducive to heeding such advice."

If OP said "I can't see a doctor," and someone said, "Everyone can see a doctor. Figure it out." That's a "check your privilege" moment. But, telling someone to "check their privilge" when they say "See a doctor" in a general advice thread regarding a medical issue, it just kind of strikes me as something a troll who wants to start shit would do.

Screen name love!

fenm - 2012-06-28 02:57 (UTC) - Expand

Re: TMI time

inkdust - 2012-06-28 03:07 (UTC) - Expand

IT'S NOT CLASS PRIVILEGE TO EDUCATE SOMEONE ABOUT THEIR BODY AND ITS IDEAL CARE. LEARN YOUR WORDS.

THIS. THIS is what's wrong with the social justice movement. Misuse of terminology in inappropriate spaces.

/someone who spent many, many years without medical insurance as well, and contracted a chronic illness as a result

Re: TMI time

fenm - 2012-06-28 06:28 (UTC) - Expand

Re: TMI time

veronica_rich - 2012-06-28 06:34 (UTC) - Expand

Then you are just a failure. You succeeded in nothing but others seeing how moronic you are to bring up a non-issue.

The conversation was distilled as follows.

OP: "Hey, I got this medical problem. Hmmm, maybe I should see the specialized doctor that could help with this about that?"
Others: Yeah, go do that.
You: SOME PEOPLE ARE TOO POOR TO DO THAT ARGH
Me and probably several others: Lol get a loada this asshole.

Oh shut the fuck up. Most people don't realize that gyno exams should start early and often. If it's not feasible it's not feasible, but not pointing it out the most basic advice when advice was asked for is irresponsible.

Also, until the idiotic Republicans finally succeed in getting them closed down, there are Planned Parenthoods nearly everywhere, which is where this anon went when she was poor and uninsured and had lady part issues.

+1000

DA

if you're around

what's it like? where does one find one? and, well. For no real reason I'm freaked out by doctors and the idea of anyone looking down there scares me and i hate feeling vulnerable.

Re: Finding one: My latest one was referred though my insurance, but if that's not an option for you, if you have a female friend who you can trust, maybe ask her? Also, if there's a Planned Parenthood you can get to, that's an option, as well.

As for the appointment itself: I'm not going to lie, it's not terribly fun. But gynecologists are trained to deal with women in all sort of circumstances, and will do their best to make it as easy for you as they can. Yes, having a stranger look at your genitals is awkward, but keep in mind that this is her* job. Also, consider the fact that regardless of what you might think, she's seen all sorts of things in her profession, and she's not going to be put off by anything she sees. If she sees a problem, she'll deal with it professionally. Though, frankly, nothing you've described sounds like a problem.

One thing to keep in mind for any doctor's visit: Write down any questions and concerns you have before hand. You may be nervous and stressed at the appointment itself, and are liable to forget. And, as the saying goes, there are no stupid questions.

*There are, of course, both male and female gynecologists; if you have a preference, make sure you say so when asking for referrals.

I hope that helps.

I see this sort of message every now and then from people online and it baffles me a bit. I'm from the UK and we totally don't do this. Most people don't ever go to a specific gynaecologist unless they have a problem, which would be identified first by the GP anyway. We have cervical smears once every three years from the age of 25 upwards and that's it.

And now I'm wondering whether there is a difference in these sorts of issues between British people and Americans.

I like how in between diagrams, the google search for hymens somehow provides pictures of cute cats. I'm not even being sarcastic- cute cats are always welcome!

How? Are there cats named hymen or something?

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