Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2012-09-27 06:43 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2012-09-27 06:43 pm
[ SECRET POST #2095 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2095 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 020 secrets from Secret Submission Post #299.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
no subject
Thus:
Goofus jerks off into his sister's shampoo while thinking about her tits.
Gallant washes efficiently, but quickly, to avoid sinful temptations.
Regarding the movies:
Goofus jerks off in a crowded theater and wipes his semen on the seat next to him. He tells his friends loudly "Didja get a look at Black Widow's ass?!"
Gallant watches the movie attentively and quietly and discusses its merits and flaws with his friends afterward.
The last one isn't mine.
Goofus figures "Fat bitch still has a cunt." Gallant enjoys all body types because he is primarily into the mind.
Goofus knows the female orgasm is a myth. Gallant has a tongue that could get work in the stamp factory.
Goofus has "accidents". Gallant never attempts anal sex without lube and plenty of foreplay and forewarning.
Goofus thanks his lucky fucking starts Mrs. Pred is so damaged. Gallant reports sexual molestation to his principal.
Goofus says "the tease ordered the fucking steak" as the police drag him off. Gallant has his partners sign a consent contract before any intimate action.
Goofus checks the kitchen for cellophane wrap. Gallant always has at least one condom on hand.
Why didn't anybody link to this classic?
(Anonymous) 2012-09-28 05:18 am (UTC)(link)Gallant is Aroused; Goofus is Horny by Dave Doty
no subject
(Anonymous) 2012-09-28 11:19 am (UTC)(link)