[ SECRET POST #222 ]

[shahni.livejournal.com]

⌈ Secret Post #222 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

I'm just abusing this thing really. Whee boredom. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ~!

Secrets Left to Post: 01 page, 037 secrets from Secret Submission Post #032.
Secrets Not Posted: 0 broken links, 0 not!secrets, 0 not!fandom.
Next Secret Post: Tomorrow, Thursday, August 16th, 2007.
Current Secret Submission Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[twelve.livejournal.com]

5. REPEAT. Anyone else notice this?

20. I kind of get what you're saying, at least some of the sentiments behind it. For instance, I really, really hate it when people on my own flist do these kinds of memes over and over and over again. Maybe they are insecure about how much they're loved, and I reply to some of the memes once or twice, but I can't be bothered to repeat myself beyond that. I should probably be more considerate. D: But I'm so fed up with other people's insecurity--if they're on my flist, it should go without saying that I already like them. Otherwise why would they be on my flist in the first place? (Thankfully, though, this is less of a problem than it was before.)

20

[(Anonymous)]

exactly thank you

[sarajayechan.livejournal.com]

...that's a good point too. I personally love the love memes (so sue me I like having my ego fed :( ), but I can understand how repetitive they get.

[twelve.livejournal.com]

Hmm, that's OK too, I think. Everyone needs love once in a while, but it's just a pet peeve of mine to see meme whores asking their respective flists to tell them why they're so awesome and cherished in the fandom community every *single* week. There's only so many times I'm willing to stroke someone's ego. People on my flist know (or should know) that they're all awesome whether or not I bother replying to those memes or whether or not they do those memes in the first place.

(And of course, my not replying to those memes isn't an accurate testament of my love for my flist. I love my flist, but not my flist's meme-whoring tendencies. If that makes sense?)

[sarajayechan.livejournal.com]

*nod*

That's why I only do them once in a while myself.

BTW, icon love. Madeline was one of my childhood heroines.

20

[teaclovers.livejournal.com]

I agree with you on this. Those memes are actually fun. But like they can be repetitive and sometimes I get the feeling my friend who always plugs them is very unsure of her trust in her friends.

Re: 20

[twelve.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I can see how they can be fun. If you're having a rough week, or some such thing, it's always nice to know there are people who love/appreciate you--but (for me, at least) people on my flist who do them over and over and over again run the risk of giving me the impression that they're really insecure about themselves. Somehow I think that no matter how many times those memes are done, those people won't feel any less insecure, so it's difficult to determine if those things actually help in the long run.

[twelve.livejournal.com]

I didn't think of that. (Then again, I'm pretty cynical about the nature of these memes, so if I had to come up with an explanation about why people pimp them so much, I think I'd just jump to the same conclusion that secret 20 offered.)

What I'M wondering is how people don't get even more insecure with these memes. You're basically asking your flist to list the reasons why they love you. Good or self-serving motivations aside, one can never really expect a truly honest answer (esp. with regards to those honesty memes from a while back). If I were one of those people who repeatedly do these memes because of whatever insecurity I might harbor about myself, at the end of the day, I think I'd be even LESS convinced of how loved/appreciated I am since I took an extremely biased opinion from my flist. I'd be thinking, "Oh, well, so-and-so HAS to say that they like me, since they're on my flist. How could they say otherwise?"

[pimmy.livejournal.com]

20. Why do people act like being insecure is some sort of selfish thing? its REALLY hard to just stop being insecure. I can understand that it's annoying if people post the same kinds of memes over and over, but I know I probably wouldn't even notice that I was doing it. Sure, common logic says that if youre on their f-list, you like them, but an insecure persons mind is REALLY bad about that kinda logic. I always get annoyed at my friends who seem to be so appalled at the notion of saying something nice just to make a friend feel a little happier, prompted or not.

[twelve.livejournal.com]

If you're referring to me, I never said anything about insecurity = selfishness. I know I'm selfish, and I'm not half as insecure as love meme-h0rs. My lack of consideration toward these people's feelings and my annoyance with their supposed insecurity are an obvious testament to my selfishness.

Sure, common logic says that if youre on their f-list, you like them, but an insecure persons mind is REALLY bad about that kinda logic.

It depends on how insecure someone is. I think that everyone is insecure to some degree, but if a person is so insecure that they can't or are unable to believe other people when being repeatedly told that, yes, they are loved and appreciated, then I think that person might have self-esteem issues that need to be addressed. Love memes alone aren't going to do crap to make that person feel better about themselves.

I'm not "appalled" at the notion myself, I just think it's fairly useless to say these nice things over and over and over again. I'll do it maybe three times, but then I'm not going to bother anymore. If a person is really insecure about how appreciated or loved they are, I doubt my repeating praises to them is really going to make them any less insecure (or, in the long run, happier). How do I know that? Well, they'd just ask for their flist to fill out the same memes again next week.

[pimmy.livejournal.com]

ah, yea i probably generalized a bit there from the other posts that were bugging me, sorry bout that XD

but yeah. I get what you're saying, i've known a few people that are just hopeless cases and I know I used to be similar. Unfortunatly its a really slow process for some people, especially if theyve never been happy with themselves or don't even realize the reason theyre constantly doing those things, because it becomes such a habit to look for acceptance.

ive found it best when my friends confronted me about it though. feeling bad for a while from a (delicate)scolding is much better than feeling good for a day from praise.


not really sure what im rambling about anymore!