fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2239 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2239 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Elementary]

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03.

[Pokemon]

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04.

[Noah, Power Rangers MegaForce]

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05.

[Mass Effect]

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06.

[Resident Evil]

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07.

[Medaka Box]

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08.

[Shameless]

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09.

[Star Trek 2009]

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10.

[Dreamwork's Sinbad, Avengers, American Gods, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Batman, Gunnerkrigg Court, Grim Adventures, Trickster's Choice/Queen]

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11.

[American Dad]

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12.

[Laurell K. Hamilton]

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13.

[my neighbour totoro]

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14.

[Medaka Box]

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15.

[Downton Abbey]

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16.

[The Red Panda, Black Jack Justice]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 080 secrets from Secret Submission Post #320.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Sometimes I wonder if I'm depressed. But I don't feel like I have the right to be, because in the grand scheme of things it's NOTHING. And if I claim that I'm depressed it somehow lessens those that actually are. And I know logically that it doesn't. But it's just ME. It's no big deal. Others have it worse.

But I feel so worthless sometimes. And I know where I am... and I know where I want to be. But I don't know how to get from point A to point B. And I sometimes wonder if it's worth even TRYING. Because I'm never going to amount to anything anyway. I haven't yet. I'm a burden to my family, but no matter how hard I try I cannot get a job that gives me hours.

I'm fine, most of the time. But there are moments when I'm lying in bed and trying to sleep where I cannot stop dwelling on my failures and inabilities to DO anything worthwhile. All I can do is cry and try not to think so much.

And I can't talk to my friends, because they have their own lives and their own troubles, and it would be wrong of me to dump my shit on them too. So... there's this. Admitting it aloud, sort of, here at Fandom Secrets, hidden behind anonymity.

Thanks for reading. I apologise for the length.

That sounds like depression to me. I mean, I'm no therapist, but I've been depressed in the past (still struggle with it sometimes) and... yeah. That's exactly how depression feels.

You aren't worthless. No one is worthless. I know it can hard to believe that, but it's true.

Try to do what you can, but try to forgive yourself when you have a hard time and can't get something done. (Honestly, forgiving myself is one of the most important things I've learned to do.)

Also, therapy might be a good idea if you can afford it. Maybe medication too, that's up to you, it certainly helps some people. (For me, it helped me be functional while I was learning the skills that I now use to get along in life without the medication.)

Oh, forgiving myself. I will definitely need to try and be more forgiving of myself. I'm... really hard on myself in general. That's... going to be a hard one. But I've gotten better about worrying too much, I can get better with this, too.

Yeah, it's one of those things where I know I'm not worthless. But it's so hard not to feel that way. Especially when I start thinking on just how much I suck at being an adult. Thank you for saying it, though. Having a place I can come as a reminder that no, I'm not as worthless as I feel.

I wish I could. But I'm still paying off medical bills from years ago. Can't really afford more debt. Maybe if I ever get a job with better health insurance that gives me hours. It has to happen some time, right?

Ah yeah, it is tough. It sounds kinda silly, but I also had to learn to forgive myself for being hard on myself? Like, it was tough to not beat myself up over beating myself up so much. Just trying to break that recursive cycle of self-hatred. But just... yeah. Having at least some part of myself that will be gentle with myself, that's important.

That sucks about the debt. :( I hope someday soon you can afford to get the help you need. I wish things didn't have to be that way...

Ah, I wish I could help more. Sorry.

It doesn't sound silly at all.

Yeah. It kind of sucks. And it's one of the biggest things that I feel horrible about. I got screwed over with the shitty health insurance I had at the time, and have been paying what I can since then.

Part of it is... I don't think where I live is all that conducive to my happiness/anti-depression. It's not BAD, it's just... the longer I'm here the more unhappy I am. There's a move in my future but packing up the amount of crap two people have accumulated over a lot of years is whole lot of boxes. I feel like I've stagnated, being here.

Just talking to you means more than you know.

Just wanted to say: it's not "nothing". You are important and valuable. Humans deserve to get help when they have problems and our experiences and lives are all important.

Please get help. Depression sucks. I've had it. I think I still technically have it but it's well-medicated (after I resisted that for a long time) and I still have issues sometimes with interactions, personality things, idk...I'm in counseling. But I'm in a much, much better place than I was a few years ago.

♥

Thank you. Feel kind of silly, getting all teary-eyed, but thank you. That means a lot to me.

I would if I could. Have too many medical bills that I'm still paying on and I can't afford to accrue any more debt as of yet. When I can, if I can; I have really shit luck with actually getting jobs. There's a reason I haven't quit the one I have, even though they scarcely give me any hours.

♥

Man, that really stinks. I feel kinda powerless but I wish there was something I could do to fix the shitty system we live in. I don't know what country you're from but if you live in the U.S. I know how hard it can be to get basic care, especially mental health care, and that's something I really care about and it's frustrating. People don't realize how important it is, and they attach a stigma to it that is very counterproductive.

I hope you get a good job soon at any rate.

And don't feel silly! I wish there were more I can do. Every time I see someone on f!s struggling with depression I want to just magically make it all better because I know how horrible it is, and I always wish there were more I can do.

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