[ SECRET POST #2246

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2246 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Mighty Morphin Power Rangers]


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03.
[Downton Abbey]


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04.
[Death Note]


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05.
[Star Trek TNG]


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06.
[Girls]


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07.
[Vampire Diaries]


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08.
[My Little Pony: Friendship is magic]


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09.
[Spartacus]


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10.
[CSI]


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11.
[The Bretts]


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12.
[Steam Powered Giraffe]


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13.
[Being Human]


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14.
[The Young Ones]


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15.
[God Bless America]


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16.
[Nerdfighteria]


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17.
[Downton Abbey]


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18.
[Disney's hunchback of Notre dame (Frollo/Esmeralda)/Titanic (Cal/Rose)/Once Upon a Time (Rumpelstiltskin/Belle)/Labyrinth (Jareth/Sarah)/ Harry potter(Ginny/Tom)/ Game of thrones (Sansa/Petyr)/ The Mummy/The Mummy Returns (Imhotep/Evelyn)/ Phantom of The Opera (Phantom/Christine)]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 076 secrets from Secret Submission Post #321.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ], [ 1 2 3 - troll secrets ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

So this is sort of a weird question, but I'm curious to see how people respond. Maybe triggery?


Did anybody grow up in a community where drug abuse was fairly commonplace?

Did anybody grow up where incest was just sort of a gross facet of your community, rather than a horrible exception?

Did anybody grow up where violent physical confrontations were just part of the social interactions in your wider community? They were the norm, rather than the exception? (To be specific, not just your family, or your peers/friends, or a small section, but the whole community?)

Did anybody grow up in a community where it was considered normal to carry a weapon on their person?

Did anybody grow up where domestic abuse was seen as normal in your community?


Sorry in advance for these weird, possibly way too personal questions. I personally answer yes to all of the above, so I'm wondering how many other people do, too.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

No.

Well, there was a lot of violence between one of my siblings towards myself, and it was sort of accepted, but nothing really extreme. More like he was a jerk, I was a brat, my parents didn't condone it but it happened so often that it was just normal for me to have bruises and expect punches. But I don't think that's what you're talking about.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[mekkio]

Did anybody grow up in a community where drug abuse was fairly commonplace?

At home no. But I grew up in a town that was pretty much, "Up with pot!" but only pot. Everything else was taboo and frowned upon.

Did anybody grow up where incest was just sort of a gross facet of your community, rather than a horrible exception?

I could so put a Southern joke here since I grew up in Virginia but no, it was frowned upon as well.

Did anybody grow up where violent physical confrontations were just part of the social interactions in your wider community? They were the norm, rather than the exception? (To be specific, not just your family, or your peers/friends, or a small section, but the whole community?)

Nope.

Did anybody grow up in a community where it was considered normal to carry a weapon on their person?

Grew up in a military town. So, it was not that strange to see someone in uniform with a weapon but in the civvie population? It would be unusual. Very unusual.

Did anybody grow up where domestic abuse was seen as normal in your community?

Nope. Again, you would think that in a military community a tolerance for violence would be higher than the general population. In fact, it was seen as the opposite. As a sailor or marine, you were supposed "to have your shit together" and not blow up.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

I did. It was called Arkansas.

That's not even a joke. Arkansas may possibly be the worst place in America.

SA

[(Anonymous)]

Just in case it wasn't clear, that was a "yes" to all of those questions.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[riddian]

I would say New Jersey is worse, but Arkansas is rather close behind.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, the more impoverished a place is, the more likely in general it is to exhibit the kind of behavior I mentioned. AFAIK, Arkansas is pretty damn impoverished in general.

But there are places like that in pretty much every state. I live in a state that's usually considered pretty stable, middle class, but my particular area of the state is pretty much Appalachian, so we get overlooked a good deal.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

No, I did not.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

No to all of those.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Cool PC way to ask if any of us grew up in a white trash/ghetto neighborhood, anon.

But yeah, aside from the weapons thing that more or less describes the kind of place I grew up in. My parents were more or less immigrants, if that makes a difference. As soon as we got money we moved to a better area.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Asking it in that way gives a very specific cultural connotation that I didn't want to invoke. Different communities, cultures, and languages call similar experience patterns by different names.

Actually, since you mention the immigrant status, I'd like to give you a piece of sociological criminal theory that addresses it. It's loosely called the circle theory, and basically those that are inside the innermost circle are thought of as the most criminal, with the most problems, and the least status as a group. As they gain status and acceptance by society, they gradually move to outer rings of the circle.

The way it was explained to me, was the example of NYC. Around the turn of the 19th century, a huge group of impoverished Irish immigrants came over due to the famine, and because of their lack of money and means, they basically were the slum folk and thought of as criminals. After a period of time, that group got wealthier, and moved into better parts of the city, away from the inner city. The next wave of immigrants to come over was the Italians-- who, due to lack of money and means, lived in the inner city slums. They gradually got more wealth and status, and moved into better parts, and the Irish moved into better parts, etc.

So yeah, just thought I'd share. It's an interesting little bit of sociological theory focused around cities.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

No to all of those.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[riddian]

I would have to say no to all of those.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[elaminator]

No to everything. It is common to own guns, but not to carry them in public.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Ahh, you mentioning carrying them in public kind of made me laugh. Plenty of pickup trucks have gun racks mounted in the back window, and generally have a few rifles stored there from Sept-Dec for hunting. And shooting at poachers, or shooting at rival poachers.

Or trespassers! I got shot at once for straying into a fringe of wooded area that bordered a school. Whoops! But it was cool, I wasn't hit.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[elaminator]

I can see people carrying rifles in their trucks for hunting!

...I'm curious as to where you live though, that someone would shoot at you for trespassing on their land. That's...a huge overreaction.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[childings.livejournal.com]

Uhhhh lots of marijuana use in my family and my parents used in front of us but I still don't think it's wrong or any less normal than someone drinking a beer, they would do it when I was supposed to be asleep anyway on the weekend when they had friends over to play D&D and such. As far as the community goes, I grew up in a fairly urban area so drug use was not too uncommon but nobody acted like it was normal, outside of marijuana use

Lots of physical and verbal abuse going on in my family so that was definitely the norm, but it wasn't considered "ok" in my community, nor the carrying of weapons unless concealed (and the whole thing about concealed weapons is that nobody knows you have them, also it's legal in the state I grew up in)

Re: Questions about upbringing

[childings.livejournal.com]

Oh and to further elaborate about the guns thing -- my parents owned guns but they were safely stored in the house and unloaded and I don't remember even knowing where they were, or knowing they had them other than them mentioning them and me seeing my mom's revolver once (which was an antique anyway). When we would go see my relatives in Arkansas during the summers sometimes they'd shoot, they live in an extremely rural area where this is common, hunting and fishing are pretty much all the recreation there is out there, so it wasn't seen as abnormal. I still don't think it's abnormal. I was allowed to shoot a few times but once when I was younger the recoil on a shotgun I was allowed to fire really scared the shit out of me, and later in college I shot a revolver at my uncle's place and I really sucked at it, so I just never had any interest in it. Range shooting actually seems like fun but... whatever

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

As for drug use, I sort of meant more hard drugs. Like, my area was pretty rampant with meth abuse. Labs all over the goddamn place. My neighbor had one, in fact.

I'm sorry to hear about the verbal abuse in your family. :( It's pretty standard where I grew up, too, to the point where verbal abuse isn't considered abuse, it's just kind of the way you get spoken to.

(And yeah, I do mean abuse, as in the way that most adults disciplines and addressed children is generally through fear, threats, insults, etc. Just cause it's normal doesn't make it any less terrifying when it happens. It just sort of happened to everyone else, too. I only realized it wasn't normal when I went away to college.)

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Yes if you consider alcoholism 'drug abuse'.

Otherwise, no.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Someone in my family abuses prescription pain pills. :\ But no to the others.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

I have a family member who's an alcoholic and addicted to painkillers, which is... a potentially lethal combination. (We've tried getting her help - she's refused every time, lied about drinking, said that she's stopped but we kept finding empty vodka bottles, the works. She's now left the country and is almost completely out of contact.) And a lot of teenagers and young adults use drugs recreationally - another family member (a teenager) smokes pot regularly, two others smoke it casually, my brother's smoked pot and taken E at parties. But that's basically viewed as 'kids will be kids', and I'd hesitate to call it drug abuse or addiction - the only one who has a serious problem is the alcoholic.

Other than that, no to everything else.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

Yes to a few. I didn't live in the greatest areas, but I know there's much worse out there too.

I don't know about whole community but... Some of my schools had a lot of fights. I was in a few. And with all the drug use even at school it's a surprise I only ever had cigarettes. And pot.

It was a sketchy neighborhood. I still wonder why I don't at least carry a knife around even though I'm in a better area now.

I don't know about incest or domestic abuse. If there had been, it was probably hushed or just not addressed in public.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[making_excuses]

I grew up with a family where drugs and alcohol was seen as something normal, but nothing else in your list. But it was not a part of the bigger community, more a small set of people living kinda close to each other and hanging out in each others flats. Norway don't have a lot of "bad" neighbourhoods.

I might be in the exception of having drug addicted/alcoholics around me all my life and never been hit.

Edit: My family are constantly in prison too, because of theft/Drugs and so on and that too is seen as "normal", it is no biggie.

Re: Questions about upbringing

[(Anonymous)]

For the first, I do remember that a drug dealer was caught two houses down from me.
The police staked out his house by parking a tractor down the street and sat it there for years. My parents were too protective for me to learn about drugs until much later from school, though.