[ SECRET POST #2265 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2265 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 106 secrets from Secret Submission Post #324.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Look, what do you want us to say? The cosplay community is not the most welcoming one and some are known to be extremely unpleasant about any cosplay that is less than perfect (I'm not saying ALL cosplayers are like that, but there are plenty of cosplayers who are) and yes, if you are overweight and you cosplay a character (which, less face it, is most likely no overweight) you're going to be laughed at by strangers.

The thing is, you're already laughed at by stranger even without cosplaying.

I won't say 'just don't give a fuck', because you obviously do. I guess you should learn not to, and it is hard to do, but it's the only way.

[(Anonymous)]

Pretty much. Unless OP gains more confidence, they are just going to get depressed by any negative comments they might get. And people who say that doctors bully them tend to have rather bad self-esteem to begin with.

[quantumreality]

I dunno, I've heard some doctors can be real jerks to their patients about weight issues.

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah... 2 years ago my mom went to the hospital because of breathing issues. The ER people thought it was a heart attack (it was pneumonia, completely unrelated to her weight) and made her stay a day to figure it out. The cardiologist treated her like shit because of her weight (he was extremely cruel to her). When her blood test results came back her was in shock because she had great cholesterol levels, no risk of diabetes, etc. He seemed really embarrassed for how he treated her (plus the whole no heart issues thing).

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT. Of course they can be, just like people in any other profession. But most people brush that kind of behavior off or call them for the jerks they are, whereas the ones who see themselves as victims tend to use the word bullying.

[charming_stranger]

Well, you certainly sound like an expert on the subject. Where can I find your research paper on people's typical reactions to unprofessional behavior from their doctors? I'd love to read it; the way you describe the results sounds like the complete opposite of what I would have expected, given the power dynamics between a doctor (who, after all, is an authority in this context) and a patient.

[(Anonymous)]

I've read a few stories about overweight women with PCOS or fibromyalgia or some other pain disorder that tried to get help from doctors and were initially told that if they "just lost some weight," all their problems would go away. This was even if the women had family histories of such disorders and their symptoms were textbook - the doctors would rather dismiss their problems out of hand just because they were heavier than average, rather than take them seriously and try to rule out things they can actually diagnose.

Granted, doctors seem to have issues taking women with pain disorders seriously in the first place, but it's not as if misogyny and fat-phobia don't greatly overlap.

[(Anonymous)]

Heh. I have PCOS and am on Metformin for it. The one time I went to one of the campus doctors to get my script refilled, I went in, told him why I was there, had to listen to a twenty-minute tirade on how I clearly overate and had a completely sedentary lifestyle (I don't - I tend to eat small portions, prefer healthier food to junk, and move plenty) and how my obesity was going to cause me to die of a heart attack, had to have my height and weight recorded just so he could record my BMI...

Bear in mind that I had said from the outset that I needed a script refill for Metformin for PCOS.

And he's gone off on a tirade about how my lifestyle, without actually ASKING me anything about it, was clearly causing me to be obese.

When I was asking for medication for a condition when causes obesity.

~Such~ a nice guy.

(Of course, he's somewhat trumped by ANOTHER campus doctor, when I went in with stomach complaints, who clearly decided that I had an anxiety disorder (he asked if I was stressed, I said 'maybe a little, final assignments are due next week, but nothing out of the ordinary and it's never caused stomach problems before) and PRESCRIBED ME ANTIDEPRESSANTS. ALSO without actually taking any psychiatric history!)

[diet_poison]

there are not words for how dumb that is. -.-

[(Anonymous)]

I've heard tales of jerkass doctors and that's terrible. =( Thankfully I've never encountered one, but I do fear that I will meet one who is an ass so I'm afraid to go to a nutritionist to help me lose weight.

[(Anonymous)]

Umm, nutritionists aren't medical doctors? The couple I know socially are nice and not jerkasses. They're there to help you to learn to eat right and get healthy and provide information to help you do that. They also know that they're not as necessary as medical doctors, who can get somewhat get away w/being jerkasses (at least, until they screw up bad. There's research showing nice, friendly docs don't get sued for malpractice even if it was their fuck up, but jerkasses do get sued for malpractice even if it was't malpractice, but the patient thinks it was).

I don't think I've ever had a jerkass doctor, but I have had a couple of incompetent doctors who I seriously disliked, but I was a minor at the time and Mom liked them for some reason. If someone's being a jerkass, just walk out. Docs aren't god contrary to whatever they may believe or even the police--you can just walk out on them.

[(Anonymous)]

So far, the nutritionist I'm seeing is the only health professional who has NOT been incredibly rude, patronizing, or otherwise jerk-y to me about my weight. She is very encouraging and I am slowly but surely seeing results! I have to admit, though, I have absolutely zero intention of ever going back to any of the other doctors I've seen lately on account of their attitudes.

[(Anonymous)]

Nutrionist isn't a legally protected term in most states, so I'd be wary to meet one too. Dietitian would be safer ;D

[(Anonymous)]

I have overweight relatives and they all had bad experiences with doctors who couldn't look past the weight issues (for things that were not weight related) and shamed them.

Medical professionals should not be interested in making patients so uncomfortable that they avoid seeking medical aid until they absolutely have no other choice. That is just so much worse than health problems caused be being overweight.

Long story short: yes, some doctors do bully overweight patients, even though they ought to be professional enough not to.

[elialshadowpine]

TW: ED, numbers, fat shaming


Yup. I'm actually needing to look for a new psych because the one I have will not stop harassing me about my weight. I'm 4'11 and 190, which is certainly overweight but not as bad when you consider I'm heavy boned and big framed. But according to my psych, I need to be "preferably 90lbs, no more than 110lbs"... when I was 130 I was a size 4, lady, wtf.

I have fibromyalgia and RA and I'm on immune suppressants but she keeps trying to convince me that I need weight loss surgery. This last appt, she tried to tell me that if I lost weight, it would make my fibro go away. (One, I developed fibro when I was 120lbs ish. Two, IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY.)

Never mind that I'm seeing her for treatment of PSYCH issues, but she spends half the appt ranting at me about stuff that isn't pertinent to my mental health and in fact triggers the fuck out of me.

[(Anonymous)]

i'm not fat but i once had a doctor ask if i wanted him to recommend a plastic surgeon for my nose... not for any medical reason, just, i have a big nose. another one wrote a script for steroids i didn't really want or ask for to treat acne, when i was a teen, and going in for something totally unrelated.

doctors can be kinda jerks.

[(Anonymous)]

Bravo! Way to derail the thread. I bet your 'big nose' never meant you were denied medical services so no one really cares. Because if your 'big nose' was a 'big ass' you could be legally denied medical services and insurance.

[(Anonymous)]

Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with you? We're all talking about asshole doctors, their experience is every bit as valid.

[(Anonymous)]

No-one is holding their hand and saying "only your problems matter".

Which, tough.

[(Anonymous)]

You are baffling.

[(Anonymous)]

Right, no one under 200 has any problems.

[(Anonymous)]

Aren't you a stupid fat fuck.

[chardmonster]

Oh hey it's a fat activist.

I'm sorry your life is so uninteresting that you've decided that your personality is Being Fat.

It's about as valid as girls who decide their personality is Being A Blonde.

[sugar_spun]

So, it's cool for doctors to be jerks, so long as they're not jerks about your weight?

[(Anonymous)]

You should care, because a doctor shaming a woman about her nose is misogyny. Which is the same thing that is happening when you're shamed for being fat. Misogyny. There is no such thing as fat phobia. yes you can be denied insurance and stuff like thay for being too big, but same with a lot of otherphysical and mental conditions that aren't anyone's fault so thats not fatphobia.