fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #248 ]

[ SECRET POST #248 ]

⌈ Secret Post #248 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

1.

10.

11.

12. [ repeat ]

13.

14.

15.

16.

17.

18.

19.

20.

21.

22.

23.

24.

25.

26.

27.

28.

29.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 143 secrets from Secret Submission Post #036.
Secrets Not Posted: 0 broken links, [ 1 2 3 ] not!secrets, 0 not!fandom, [ 1 2 3 ] personal attacks, [ 1 ] attempt at parody, [ 1 ] repeat.
Next Secret Post: Tomorrow, Tuesday, September 11th, 2007.
Current Secret Submission Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Nice to see someone else actually realizes that knowing your own sexuality isn't as easy as looking at some femmeslash or having a crush on your RP partner.

I'm not saying you can't be a lesbian without experience or anything. It's just harder to know, personally, that you're a lesbian without experience.

How can you tell if you like chocolate cake over vanilla cake if you haven't tried either one?

How can you tell if you like chocolate cake over vanilla cake if you haven't tried either one?

That reasoning is completely ridiculous if you apply it in reverse. How can you tell you won't like having sex with a man if you are a lesbian, if you've never tried it? How can you tell you won't like it if you are a straight man, if you've never tried it?

Of course it's ridiculous to throw yourself into a label just because you have one crush on a girl, or you like yuri or whatever. Your hands can get you off, fictional characters can get you off, tentacles can get you off in fantasy, so the sky is the limit when it comes to human sexuality in thought and mind.

But a lot of straight girls do not like their first experiences with men, sexually. A lot of them don't have many good sexual experiences with men until they find the right one. So if a lesbian gets with another woman, and ends up not liking it, is she therefore not a lesbian? All of her past feelings for women are now invalidated based on this one experience, this one woman not doing it for you? What about a woman who saves herself for marriage, and ends up not enjoying sex with her husband that much and never really being into it? Is she really heterosexual? She still gets off to the thought of men, but I suppose that's just not enough.

I don't think sexuality is that easy. I don't think it should have a set of rules, either, such as "If you havent done this and that, you cant be sure. If you do this and that, but sometimes feel like going back to doing THIS, then you must have been confused or faking. Etc etc."

Social constructionism plays a giant role. A girl can be confused and have a crush on a woman and of course end up having a harder time actually acting out a sexual act with her, because guess what? It's hard for people to be comfortable with things like that and enjoy it. It doesn't mean her feelings aren't real, though. Unless you actually really want to say that.

There are couples very much in love that end up having the sex die down between them. I guess that means it was just a phase and they no longer love each other. They would have better times with strangers, so they should just go with them instead.

Blah blah I could apply it to anything and point out the hole in that.

It seems like alright logic until you apply it to all sexualities. So let people be confused or not be sure of what they are but say they are something anyways. It's a part of growing up. No need to be self-righteous about it. Really, who gives a shit? People only let it bother them because they want something to be bothered by.

Why do you give a shit about what other people think about it? Do you let these opinions bother you because you want something to be bothered by?

Are you bothered by the fact that she's bothered by it because you just want something to be bothered by?

Are you bothered by the fact that she's bothered by me being bothered by her wanting something to be bothered by?

I'M SO CONFUSED.

Are you bothered by the possibility that I might be bothered by her being bothered by someone else's opinion because she simply wants a reason to bothered?

Ummm, I'm not dictating a large part of someone's identity in this culture and telling them they need to do certain things to be considered something. So yes, that is why I am bothered.

PS you smell.

I'm sorry the internet has offended your delicate sensibilities.

And, yes. Yes, I do smell. I smell like spearmint.

lol internet tough guy.

Betta recanaaaaize.

Lol if you ever voice dissent or argue on the internet you are actually secretly crying behind the monitor and are sensitive and sad

Pretty much. Kind of like if you present an opinion on a controversial subject that doesn't quite fit in with the norm, you're a bigot and ignorant.

I think it's a fair trade.

Nah, I haven't seen myself call you ignorant or a bigot. I kind of just stated my opinion back. I forgot your opinion shield was on! Meaning that if you share your opinion, and I share one countering yours, it means I'm not letting you have yours and think you're a bigot and horrible and should die.

PS, your opinion IS the norm outside of LJ. In fact the lesbian community is pretty hateful and psycho about that stuff GRR YOU FAKE BI GRR ARE YOU BUTCH OR FEMME GRRR YOUVE SLEPT WITH MEN BEFORE GRR GRRR

Which is kind of why they are considered to be hateful douches by a lot of people. And why the media had to be retarded and create the image of the 'fake' lesbian (ie perfect pretty only doing it for attention) and a 'real' lesbian (mean ugly bitch).

Not you. I happened to get nosy and look at a few other comments on the secret.

And honestly? I don't really care if it's not the norm outside of LJ. Different opinions are peachy, I can watch people get all butthurt if I don't agree with theirs. But what astounds me is how people who slightly or fully agree with a secret are often put on the chopping block. Got beef with a secret, take it up with the OP, even though no one's opinion is going to be changed in the end.

Some people definitely get too touchy. I am always up for debate, so I will state my opinion. But if someone thinks that you need experience to back up or be sure of your sexuality, while I generally disagree with the sentiment I won't really attack them too harshly. Why? Because in certain circumstances (as people are, you know, a case by case subject) there ARE girls/guys that are just expirementing but really don't plan to live the lifestyle of the behaviour they've wrongfully 'labeled' themselves as. And in the end, it's up to the people outside whether that is okay with them or not.

Certain secrets, when attacking a denomination of people or making generalizations, however, are bound to ensure backlash from anyone who agrees with that.

People just like their opinions heard on the internet. It makes them feel special, or they like to see who has common beliefs/interests. B) And some people generally like to hear different opinions.

The OP's secret and generalization/assumption about the antisocial thing was stupid. But anyone who just agrees with an aspect of the secret and generally states their opinion doesn't apply to EVERY case shouldn't really get people attacking them.

But this is sexuality. It's taboo, overrated, and overly controversial. You'll always get anger flung at you for anything you say D:

It seriously sounds like you're the butthurt one here.

I'm just so used to people disagreeing with the IDEA of me (I like girls. So I'm a lesbian. Always have liked girls. One day I might like a man though D: WILL THAT MEAN I WAS FAKING THE ENTIRE TIME?), that I never get hurt when people disagree with my opinion. I get confused when people feel attacked if their opinion is unpopular or disagreed with?

I mean, I probably have the most unpopular opinions ever on the age of consent. But I never feel attacked because I understand that it's a sensitive subject for people. Idk. I feel bad if I offended anyone though D:

Oh my god. Can't we all agree that sexuality is fluid and not at all easily boiled down to "gay, straight, bi" because there always are and always will be exceptions to every rule and all of us just stop getting butthurt about the entire thing.

Why the hell does everyone care so much what one person with photoshop thinks? Obviously, judging from the comments, they are in the minority, so why does it even matter?

Oh my god. Can't we all agree that sexuality is fluid and not at all easily boiled down to "gay, straight, bi" because there always are and always will be exceptions to every rule and all of us just stop getting butthurt about the entire thing.

Apparently not. And it's not like any secret on here really bothers me past some passing annoyance. I just felt like sharing my opinion. :)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #248 ]

re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22

Re: 22