Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2013-04-18 07:11 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2013-04-18 07:11 pm
[ SECRET POST #2298 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2298 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 021 secrets from Secret Submission Post #328.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
no subject
I wince at 50 Shades because I know it shows an unhealthy relationship. If I wanted to get into a BDSM relationship, I would be praying like all fragging hell my partner is not a fucked up over-possessive stalker douchebag like Grey. I'd want someone who really understands "Safe, Sane, and Consentual".
(Note: I am mid-thirties virgin with no real interest in changing that status, let alone actually getting into BDSM. All my reliable BDSM knowledge comes from fics written by people who have practised BDSM. I trust their judgement on such things a long way before I'd trust a 50 Shades fan.)
no subject
No kidding! Being a dominant is so much more than just beating and screwing (from what I understand; I know a lot of people in the scene). There's so much psychology involved and so much mood reading. From my outsider perspective, I would think that the dominant party would have to have the most control over themselves. You know, to not punish in anger, to remember limits, to be able to stop no matter how much fun they were having.
I much prefer Anne Rice's Sleeping Beauty BDSM series (which I got at 17) for a million reasons, but one of the top things it has over 50Shade is that the Sleeping Beauty series is not the kind of screwed up that can be imitated. Even the most mind-numbingly dense 50SoG fan wouldn't be able to hurt themselves with Rice's book because the fairytale setting plus the medieval motif plus the slave system set up makes it clear that this is a fairytale kingdom where this is how things work out, so unless they want to build a time machine or go find a real life prince, this book won't directly cause bad BDSM relationships the way SoG could/will. It's pure fantasy and it doesn't hesitate to remind.
no subject
My favourite BDSM story was a LotR fanfic, where it shows the same basic type of BDSM that went round Fandom at the time, then revealed that the relationship was totally fucked up and showed how the couple slowly recovered and built something that worked.