case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-05-13 06:50 pm

[ SECRET POST #2323 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2323 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 069 secrets from Secret Submission Post #332.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-14 01:06 am (UTC)(link)
i.e. I won't think about it, then I'll "share" it

Are "sharing" and "ignoring" really your only two options of dealing with upsetting things? o.O

(Anonymous) 2013-05-14 01:37 am (UTC)(link)
Who said I'm "ignoring" it? A lot times what doesn't upset me upsets the person I'm sharing it with. They get upset and make a big deal about something I regarded as nothing, inconsequential, a (very) minor irritant, and then get upset about that I'm not upset. Well, not until they get upset. Then I get upset/mad that they're upset usually. I don't like drama. Sometimes, I can see their point and sometimes that'll upset me, but usually the whole situations/whatever is long past and getting upset now is pointless....b/c of this whole cycle I don't usually share things w/people. It's just not worth upsetting my peace of mind. It's lose-lose. I can work things out by myself.

Sometimes it is something that is upsetting to me and the other person doesn't regard it a big deal and tells me to get over it. Not what I'm looking for. I want empathy, they want me to shut up. Makes me sorry I shared. Also, makes me mad/angry about all the time I've listened to them rant about their problems for hours on end and they can't listen to me for 5 minutes w/o telling me to shut it/calm down. And if they do get upset, I usually end up having to calm them down b/c I don't want to deal w/their drama. It's lose-lose. I want to be the one calmed down tyvm since I'm the one it happened it.

I do sometimes talk things over w/very trusted friends, but mostly they've fallen by the wayside for the most part due to rl (kids, moving away, etc.). Sometimes I post online to see what people suggest if I think I need an outside perspective, but I usually don't. I draw, write, and can get my feelings out, perspective on it, that way usually.