fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2330 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2330 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 068 secrets from Secret Submission Post #333.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I can fucking fumble a coup de gras and cut off my own finger. Who does that?

One of our most memorable D&D games was when our paladin and his horse were pursuing a bad guy, and the paladin got out his lance and prepared to skewer the guy.

He fumbled. He rolled a critical, hit friend. The only 'friend' near him was the horse.

So our paladin ended up taking out his own horse, then fumbled his recovery and knocked himself out with his own sword. The bad guy got away, of course.

We STILL talk about that game!

There are two types of excellent and hilarious tabletop gaming stories.

1) When someone tries something completely ridiculous and succeeds in the luckiest, most epic way possible.
2) When someone tries to do something, anything, and fails in a completely unexpected, out of left field, 'HELP. THE DICE ARE TRYING TO KILL ME,' way.

That is definitely the latter, and also hilarious.

OOH OOH I have a #2 story.

Back in the days of 3.5, I was in a game that started at level 1. We all made our characters, and we got contracted by the king to go do something. Well, our wizard was messing around, and he said "LET'S SIGN THE CONTRACT IN BLOOD!"

The DM had him roll to hit to poke his finger with a needle. He critical hit and did 4 damage total to himself.

This particular wizard also only had 4 hit points.

So he stabbed his finger and then passed out and we had to drag him to the infirmary because my cleric only had one healing spell for the entire day and she wasn't going to waste it on him.

My husband loves to tell the story of his almost level 20 paladin in 2e that fumbled a climb check, fell out of a tree, broke his neck, and died.

And when they resurrected him, he didn't have the stats to be a paladin again (since you had to reroll stats), so he became a death knight and killed everyone in his church, his fiancee, and his fiancee's family.

And THAT'S what you do when life gives you lemons.

And my husband just corrected me that apparently paladins can only be 17 in 2e and he was 12. And his party didn't have enough money for a resurrection so they had to do reincarnate, which is why he rerolled. Obviously, I didn't dabble much in 2e, ha ha. :)

[ SECRET POST #2330 ]

Dice rolls make the best games!

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Re: Dice rolls make the best games!

Re: Dice rolls make the best games!